Alien: Covenant.

[TheWoodenSpoon]

Seen this twice now, easy and enjoyable way to throw a couple of hours on a crap day. I quite like it, even though it's rather predictable (but then damn near everything is these days).

I still think his 'robot' acting is, for me, surprisingly and inappropriately broad, lacking nuance, especially compared against, say, Ian Holm's Ash.

Ash being a robot was a big surprise though. David was revealed as a robot almost immediately. Ash is a much later model anyway so of course he won't be so obviously synthetic, at least until you clobber him over the back of the head with something heavy.

[Howj Begg]

I saw Ridley Scott in Soho about two months after Prometheus came out. I gave him a look. He knew.

[TrenterPercenter]

It's the shittest Alien yet.

Ridley Scott showing that not only is he a shit version of his previous self, he is also a shit version of James Cameron too.

[Kelvin]

It's the shittest Alien yet.

Is it, though?

Is it?

I mean, I know there's a lot of Alien: Resurrection revisionism going on, post-Prometheus, but really... is this actually worse than Resurrection? I mean, could you stand before god and say that with a straight face?

[Sexton Brackets Drugbust]

Seen this twice now, easy and enjoyable way to throw a couple of hours on a crap day. I quite like it, even though it's rather predictable (but then damn near everything is these days).
Ash being a robot was a big surprise though. David was revealed as a robot almost immediately. Ash is a much later model anyway so of course he won't be so obviously synthetic, at least until you clobber him over the back of the head with something heavy.

The 'David's an earlier model' suggestion often comes up, but when all other technology is depicted as infinitely superior than what we see, what? 30 - 80 years later in Alien and Aliens respectively, I personally don't buy it.

I just think it's a bit of a hackneyed robo-performance with a limited bag o' tricks to draw from, all of which I've seen before. It's great that people can get on board with the acting choices, it just doesn't work for me.

Lance Henrikson's Bishop is revealed as a synthetic early on in Aliens and, for my money manages to convey a detached otherness without so heavily leaning on some of the more obvious performance shorthand for 'robot.'

[TrenterPercenter]

No you are right it marginally less shit than resurrection.


*Mega spoilers to follow*

Of course this is largely down to it being made two decades later so looks and sounds much better.  Yet the direction is abysmal, characters are painfully stupid I'm going...for a leak/clean up/follow this weird android and look into this menacing egg.

But wait; hey this place is deserted, 8km to the distress call.....arrrgh a sick crew member better lock the med bay door lose my shit and blow up the ship, doh, oh well don't worry there is a massive fuck off city in running distance that we didn't see on entry and wasn't picked up on any of our scans.

Utter balls.

[Sexton Brackets Drugbust]

The characters in the original Alien are so well drawn and economically presented. We know a surprising amount about each of them, in a comparatively small space of time, and details like the class system/social hierarchy within the crew really serves to enrich the film universe.

The characters in Prometheus aren't nearly so well drawn, and end up being largely forgettable, aside from their general stupidity.

[Replies From View]

Anyone want to report on how much teal and orange is used in 'Alien Comandante'?

[Steven]

I watched Prometheus again and it's still incomprehensible shit, but I was reminded by this hilarious scene with David's simpering smile while Shaw bags his head up:

[thugler]

Bit of a weird film. Thought it was about as good as prometheus, which I actually quite liked apart from some of the lamer plot elements

Lots of action, which mostly isn't done that well, but the backburster scene was good. I thought the CGI throughout was pretty mediocre though, especially for the spaceship stuff early on. The middle section once they meet David felt like old school star trek, bit jarring tonally. The flute teaching scene had about three massive innuendos in a row which caused roars of laughter. The main problem was the action scenes were fairly dull and didn't have enough tension bar the backburster one. Half the characters are completely pointless too. Saw the twist coming too, and it seems odd why he helped her fight the alien and didn't just help kill her.

[weekender]

could you stand before god and say that with a straight face?

What's a 'god'?

[TheFalconMalteser]

The only good bit was when David said "I do the fingering".

[Kelvin]

What's a 'god'?

A giant bald alien who created life by drinking poison, apparently.

[Small Man Big Horse]

It's only taken $36 million in the US, which isn't a disaster but rumours suggest that Fox aren't happy with the number. So maybe they will get Scott to fuck off and hand the series over to a director who has the ability to make decent films, I'd be a lot more enthusiastic if he wasn't involved.

[Alberon]

Maybe resurrect Neill Blomkamp's Alien 5? Going back to Sigourney Weaver must surely interest them.

Ridley Scott is great with visuals (Usually. It has to be said that Prometheus looked a lot better than Covenant), but he can't whip a script into shape for love nor money.

[Dr Rock]

Anyone want to report on how much teal and orange is used in 'Alien Comandante'?

I want to know this too, although I am confident the answer is 'shit loads'. Now that i think about it, another good thing about Guardians Of That Galaxy vol 2 is the lack of the teal and orange madness.

[buzby]

Anyone want to report on how much teal and orange is used in 'Alien Comandante'?

I saw it last night - not that much, as far as I can remember. Most of it takes place on the Engineers' homeworld, a fjord-and forests landscape (actually New Zealand) in the middle of a storm so the exteriors are quite grey and dark. The interiors are very similar to the interiors of the ship and temple in Prometheus.

The look of the Covenant is like a cleaner, higher-tech version of the Nostromo (externally it's a cross between the Cygnus from The Black Hole and 2001's Discovery with added solar sails).

the film was OK, not great but not terrible either. It was similar enough to Alien at times to make it feel like a soft reboot. The crew still make stupid decisions like the crew in Prometheus, but at least they have the excuse of being in couples this time.

[Howj Begg]

I liked this!

Let's be honest though, this wasn't really an 'alien' movie. It was an insane robot movie.

Fassbender gave excellent insane robot, he really was a treat.

Katherine's waterson's part was a bit underwritten to me.

even thoguh we knew it was David all along in the ship, it was still played with wonderfully witty ambiguity.

In fact I thnink this was the funniest alien film in the franchise. Alien resurrection tries to be funny but fails imo. In this Fassbender's wonderfully hammy performance really ties the whole thing togteher into a black comedy.

[Howj Begg]

Wanted to see more of the stone city. Wanted to see more backstory of the engineers. Once again something that looks amazing is left mysterious, like in prometheus. i like that in theory, but would want to know more.

Really fun film though, and it didnt go too overboard in the religious stuff, it just nodded to it several times. i dont mind those themes being present in the background in this saga. You just dont want it to become too silly.

And without question, some of the LOTR aspects of the  middle part of this film were silly. In a way I don't mind, it was sort of awe inspiring,  but yeah, very silly.

[Howj Begg]

Saw this last night.

Great cast




Otherwise, diminishing returns.

Haha I leaned over to my friend and whispered iggy pop too

[Howj Begg]

I think Kelvin's been bang on the money in this thread, but I think more of Fassbinder than he does. I think it was a very good performance. Someone said earlier that his performance of David was too inappropriately broad for a robot, but I loved that. He is an insane robot, which means to say he has acquired consciousness. He has emotions and goals. I think Fassbender played that brilliantly.

[Howj Begg]

Bit of a weird film. Thought it was about as good as prometheus, which I actually quite liked apart from some of the lamer plot elements

Lots of action, which mostly isn't done that well, but the backburster scene was good. I thought the CGI throughout was pretty mediocre though, especially for the spaceship stuff early on. The middle section once they meet David felt like old school star trek, bit jarring tonally. The flute teaching scene had about three massive innuendos in a row which caused roars of laughter. The main problem was the action scenes were fairly dull and didn't have enough tension bar the backburster one. Half the characters are completely pointless too. Saw the twist coming too, and it seems odd why he helped her fight the alien and didn't just help kill her.

this is a great post.
middle felt like old skool star trek, yes. i liked the innuendos, because david later tries to snog walter. his is an insane robot's idea of love. CGI wasn't better then it neded to be, i agree with that. there is one truly horrifying death though, the woman who's bitten across her shoulders.

as i say, i dont think the twist was a twist, cos everyone knew from the start when we see fassbender after the fight. we're meant to enjoy the hammy comedy, whilst also being entertained by the 'ambiguous' touches.

[Hollow]

Entertaining nonsense...not worthy of the name, they should've called it Prometheus II.

I'm now convinced Scott is done as a director...I think they should steer him into the retirement home.

But, not the worst film ever, not the worst Alien film either...quite gory and that was nice.

5/10

[Replies From View]

I always insist on pronouncing the title of this film ALIEN COVE-NANT (rhymes with MAUVE-RANT).

People are bothering to correct me!  I say "ah right" and then keep saying COVE-NANT.


Fucking awesome thing to do, I tell you.  Arguably better than the film itself.

[Shit Good Nose]

I still think it's better than Guardians of the Galaxy 2.


And I never thought I'd be writing that sentence...

[Repeater]

It's no

[Replies From View]

Is it available to download yet?

[Hollow]

Yes a crappy copy, this is available however.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmwyWerz5KI

[Howj Begg]

https://humanizingthevacuum.wordpress.com/2017/05/27/queerture-feature-alien-covenant/
Love this guy's take, emphasising the queer aspects of Fassbender's performance, and the character. "Fassbender gets his best showcase for his bitch-priss elegance".

Spoiler

This is barely an Alien film. It is an insane robot film, and moreover, it's a film where that robot's sexual instincts are awakened, thus making him about as human as he can be. Being a psychopathic narcissicist, David's sexuality is woken by his doppelganger. A being which he cannot procreate with, cannot create anything from, in contrast to his work with the xenomporhs, where he is a creator. The latter themes serves as an ironic meta-commentary on religious belief and specifically religious belief in creation. The captain is a believer, but the film shows that only beings create other beings; the engineeers created the black goo (and thus the creatures in Prometheus), and David creates the xenomorphs. All of this creation is done in the lab. All of these acts of creation are done from dubious motives (like in most mythological creation tales); either for use as a weapon, pure curiosity about biological and evolutionary processes, and/or amoral narcissism. David regards the xenomorphs as perfect organisms, and I think its clear he regards himself as pretty perfect too.
David is very lonely, and has gone mad from loneliness. He has contempt for humans, so has no interest in them, but he would be happy for the xenomorphs and Walter to stay with him, as he admires their perfection. I think his fascination for the xenomorphs is partly due the fact that they regenerate so readily. This is one thing he badly misses: he talks about creation so much, but knows his ability to create is limited. The xenomorphs on the other hand mutate across generations with ease, their flexible DNA is extraordinary, and David is slightly jealous of that, as well as in awe of it. Although he is able to breed new types, all of the biochemical magic comes from the black goo. David is a frustrated creator, which may be the origin of his sexual impulse.

Scott has little interest in monster movies any more, but he is still interested in horror, just horror as it applies to certain themes: AI, evolution, sexuality, 'gods', and creation. There are enough terrifying implications in all these subjects to explore, and I think he does that really well in this film. 

The obvious direction for the next film, is to see David disembowelled by one of his own creations. I can see David smiling in exquisite pleasure right now at this honour. What kind of offspring results from that could be fascinating.

[Mister Six]

Had no interest in seeing this, but was dragged along by my missus anyway. It didn't even live up to those expectations. Hard not to empathise with David's belief that he is better than all human life when literally every human within 100 years of him is a fucking idiot at all times. Even the nonsensical design of the ship suggests that Earth is populated by morons.

Anyway: Aside from nervy Christian captain (who got the only human-related scene I liked, where he talks about meeting the Devil), chubby Ripley and the bloke from Eastbound and Down, I was incapable of telling who any of the humans were at any point, or caring about any of them. The plot just kind of meanders halfheartedly whenever David's not on screen - he was very clearly the only part either Scott or the scriptwriter gave a shit about - and goes nowhere in particular, then finishes with an overly CGIed, utterly unthrilling scene that's like the ending of Alien TIMES A BILLION except without the slightest shred of tension.

List of stupid fucking nonsense things humans did in the film:

* Designed cryo pods that cannot be opened from the inside, meaning that if the robot breaks down, is disabled or turns out to be evil, you can't get out.

* Also filled cryo pods with petrol or something, so if they go a bit wrong you burn to death horribly.

* Put the long-term cargo pods for the colonists on stupid dangly cables, in a ship with artificial gravity, so that if there's any rocking or destabilisation, they'll bash into each other and fall off, and kill the people inside.

* Made all of the active crew on the ship couples, so that in the event of something going wrong, they would act not in the interests of the mission and the 2,000 people in stasis, but in the interests of their partners.

* Didn't make nervy Christian fella captain because of his religion, but did put him in a position where he would be captain if James Franco bit it.

* Didn't equip the crew with hazmat suits or even little face masks in the event of, say, the planet they are to land on having viruses, malicious bacteria or gross little black spore things.

* Crew then flew to spooky unknown too-good-to-be-true alien planet, took down most of the people with them.

* When two of their members became sick, either did not have, or did not initiate, quarantine procedures.

* When examining guy in horrible pain, don't wear any kind of protective clothing so his blood can spray all over you.

* Then panic and lock someone else in the room with him.

* Then panic again and blow up the ship with you in it.

(I know I've changed tenses at this point; shush.)

* When walking into a big temple thing occupied by a mysterious android, don't enquire about all the blackened, stone-like corpses around the place.

* Similarly: all split up upon arriving, without establishing any kind of perimiter even though you know there's a murderous thing outside.

* When said android has yammered on about his creating creepy parasites and monsters, follow him into his creepy cellar, then trust him when he asks you to peer over a gross alien egg thing.

I can't be bothered going on, but you get the idea. It's chock full of indistinguishable idiot people doing unbelievably idiotic things to no real end.

Would much rather have had a proper film about David and his plans, rather than this formless anodyne nonsense.