The Quimbles

[Mr Brightside]

New kids TV show set inside a vagina, featuring three small creatures known as Quimbles. Each day, they embark on adventures while teaching you to count and read.

Theme tune . . .

Quimbles . . . Quimbles . . . Quimbles, yeah, yeah, yeah!

Meet Pedro and Andy and Goblin Paul
Watch as they teach the kids, kids one and all
The poor kids, the rich kids, the black or the white
The straight ones and gay ones; they're all alright

So come inside to their vaginal realm
Where trees grow in seconds, the birch and the elm
And pandas play freely with the fish in the sea
The clever clogs Quimbles teach you and teach me!

They're the Quimbles!

[checkoutgirl]

Definitely is poo this lad.

[JoeyBananaduck]

Definitely is poo this lad.

Rude.

[JoeyBananaduck]

That's not how I remember the theme tune though. Maybe it changed after series 6?

Quimbles of Wombledon, common as muck
They live in a cunt
And they don't give a fuck

They live for the filthy, the mucky and torrid
No morals to speak of
And the language is horrid

They fill young girls with dismay and despair
As they teach little bros
To flick V's and pull hair

They flob on the carpet
They're sick on the walls
They use mother's best cutlery
To scratch their balls

So be sure not to watch
For there's no pleasant features
To the Quimbles of Wombledon
Such repulsive creatures

[pancreas]

Definitely is poo this lad.

No it's got to be poo's son. poo would always deliberately sabotage his own rhymes and scansion.

[Glebe]

I'm not watching this.

[Mr Brightside]

I'm not watching this.

You're not the target audience. If you've got kids, be sure that they tune in when it starts next week on whatever the equivalent of CITV is these days.

[Glebe]

You're not the target audience. If you've got kids, be sure that they tune in when it starts next week on whatever the equivalent of CITV is these days.

I don't have children, but I shan't be letting them watch this.