Worst Dancing by A Pop/ Rock Star

[TheMonk]

Watching Top Of The Pops repeats, witnessed this attrocious attempt at dancing by Paul Young and two equally uncoordinated backing singers.
https://youtu.be/5pvmhSgmLN0
That hands clenched waving side to side thing; the floor manager should have stopped them in rehearsals and had a quiet word.

Other examples?

[buzby]

OMD's Andy McCluskey in anything.

[DrGreggles]

I always thought that George Michael was surprisingly shit at dancing.

[Lisa Jesusandmarychain]

Louise Wener of Sleeper fame.

[doppelkorn]

Apparently Lady Gaga can't dance, so her choreographer invented some "moves" where she kind of makes a claw and jerks her limbs about. It suits her quirky image and disguises her lack of ability.

[Glebe]

Watching Top Of The Pops repeats, witnessed this attrocious attempt at dancing by Paul Young and two equally uncoordinated backing singers.
https://youtu.be/5pvmhSgmLN0
That hands clenched waving side to side thing; the floor manager should have stopped them in rehearsals and had a quiet word.

To be fair it's not THE WORST THING HE'S EVER DONE.

[wosl]

Roland Orzabal on a jetty.

[Lemming]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sehg7gEbgyU

I don't know what Michael Stipe is doing there. It might actually be the best dancing by a pop/rock star.

Also, both members of Strawberry Switchblade were extraordinarily bad at dancing:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lYh_3EGcqdI

[wosl]

I would say Stipe's trying to wind Buck up there; trying to offset Buck's usual sub-Keef pigeon-toed staggering around with a little effete twisting.

[Colin Sanction]

Either Ian Curtis https://youtu.be/rDx5Mvsx_Vo or this clown https://youtu.be/GK4lD3Uf8_o

[TheMonk]

That Croaking Paul Young video is still one of the most depressing things on the internet.
Phil Collins doing some terrible dad dancing.
Maybe it's for the best he may be doing his upcoming shows with a walking stick.
https://youtu.be/tZnD6HqCKZI

[Phil_A]

Stipey and Thom Yorke not being quite sure what to do on stage during this duet, and settling on lots of awkward shuffling and arm gesticulations. It's almost endearingly awkward.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-0O_QD-UZ8M

[Technique]

very weird this thread appearing because yesterday, for no good reason I can explain, I found myself looking up Paul Young TOTP appearances on youtube to check out those very same backing singers (something I have never had the urge to do before at all).

They used to appear quite a lot on TV back then because they also worked with Jools Holland. The Fabulously Weathly Tarts was their name. And their dancing on the clip I looked up yesterday is quite brilliant. Especially during the chorus. Quite a moving experience for my young self to witness. In oh so many ways.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yete0n6TLug

[Brundle-Fly]

Stipey and Thom Yorke not being quite sure what to do on stage during this duet, and settling on lots of awkward shuffling and arm gesticulations. It's almost endearingly awkward.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-0O_QD-UZ8M

I lasted up to the point Stipe crouches at the edge of the stage posing in his sarong to earnestly chug mineral water. Looks like a gibbon about to take a crap.

Talking of which, Chaz Jankel appears to have crapped himself in this clip. Tune though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J8LvYKXdUe0&list=RDJ8LvYKXdUe0#t=44

[non capisco]

or this clown https://youtu.be/GK4lD3Uf8_o

Ahh no, I love that. Lost in that tune, he is.

[Dr Rock]

I seem to recall that Bananarama's 'dancing' was mostly marching about on the spot, then marching forwards a bit, then back again.

[phantom_power]

Roland Orzabal on a jetty.

I think when they did that on TOTP he stopped miming with his guitar to do that dance. He must have been proud of it

[buzby]

very weird this thread appearing because yesterday, for no good reason I can explain, I found myself looking up Paul Young TOTP appearances on youtube to check out those very same backing singers (something I have never had the urge to do before at all).

They used to appear quite a lot on TV back then because they also worked with Jools Holland. The Fabulously Weathly Tarts was their name. And their dancing on the clip I looked up yesterday is quite brilliant. Especially during the chorus. Quite a moving experience for my young self to witness. In oh so many ways.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yete0n6TLug

They really are are great - as I've been saying over in the TOTP thread, they completely steal the show every time they appear as part of Young's Royal Family. Maz (the blonde one) later married The Millionaires and Royal Family fretless bass wiz Pino Palladino, and Kim is a Reverend in the Unitarian church in New York.
They released a couple of singles after working with The Royal Family on No Parlez - The Last Time in 1983 as the FWTs, and When the Outlaws Come as 2 Much in 1985:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ufnu9aY0Xxc

On the subject of the thread, Bernard Sumner's 'Rave Dad' dancing, shown here on the Reading '98 performance of BLT:
https://youtu.be/lJjkU9bTqlU?t=24m45s
(It was even worse when he was E'd up on the Technique tour in 1989, but apart from a couple of seconds of live footage in the video for Run 2, I can't find a decent clip).

EDIT: I've found one - the TOTP (live) performance of Fine Time:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YVqzsVNGM7c

[TheMonk]

Roland Orzabal on a jetty.

If only Curt was looking out of the other window he could have ran out and helped his mate Roland get rid of that swarm of wasps.

Ladies and gentlemen, Jim Kerr.
https://youtu.be/dKzrnHjipTU

[manticore]

Either Ian Curtis https://youtu.be/rDx5Mvsx_Vo

No, that's the best dancing.

[non capisco]

I seem to recall that Bananarama's 'dancing' was mostly marching about on the spot, then marching forwards a bit, then back again.

The sodding choreographer was a twot twot twot

[non capisco]

I think when they did that on TOTP he stopped miming with his guitar to do that dance. He must have been proud of it

It actually looked less shit in that brief bit where he did it on the TOTP performance, almost playful and knowing. Tears For Fears are fuckin boss, leave 'em alone.

[Mr Banlon]

Roland Orzabal on a jetty.

That dance was actually a thing at my school when Mad World came out. A kid called Luke did a perfect rendition of it in the playground the day after the video was shown on The Pops. The girls fucking loved it.

[Mr Banlon]

https://youtu.be/byQIPdHMpjc?t=188

[Jockice]

That bloke from Blancmange.

[3D]

No mention of this guy?

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=GK4lD3Uf8_o

Action. Image. Exchange.

[kngen]

Not being blinded by her extreme attractiveness, it was my wife that pointed out to me that Shakira, for all her sexy 'whore dancing' moves and lithe flexibility, is actually a terrible dancer.

She's clearly been dancing her whole life, knows all the moves, and probably has the best choreographers money can buy, but it's true: looking beyond the near-pornographic gyrations, she's got the co-ordination and grace of a newborn foal. She still has a fair old go at it though, bless her.

Item A: Shewolf

Item B: Hips Don't Lie (they make her sit down for a lot of this, to avoid her lurching about like a drunk robot, which seems to be her go-to move)

Item C: Beautiful Liar - seems unfair to have her up against Queen B, who can dance her ass off in her sleep, but not even jump cuts and not a whole lot of actual dancing can disguise the fact that she's not even in the same universe as Beyonce when it comes to this stuff. They should have cut in a bit of this


to make her look slightly less out of her depth.

[buzby]

No mention of this guy?

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=GK4lD3Uf8_o

Action. Image. Exchange.

Either Ian Curtis https://youtu.be/rDx5Mvsx_Vo or this clown https://youtu.be/GK4lD3Uf8_o

[3D]

Ah, I did wonder. He must cost that band an absolute fortune.

[Porter Dimi]

GIMME SOME REGGAE!