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Pippa Middleton ties the knot with her famous anus

Started by touchingcloth, May 20, 2017, 09:08:29 AM

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Urinal Cake

What a pair of gaylords wearing those pants and holding hands!

Custard

Quote from: touchingcloth on May 20, 2017, 12:43:39 PM
And yet she's chosen to marry a garden centre manager. Fair play to her, I always assumed she'd be the type to go for some hotshot from the world of finance.

Still a millionaire though, apparently. Just with extra compost

QUICK POLL: Kate or Pippa?

I'd like Kate's face and bod, with Pippa's arse stuck on the back. If that's allowed

JoeyBananaduck

Quote from: greencalx on May 20, 2017, 09:42:12 AM
I think you mean gluteus maximus rather than anus, as I don't recall the latter being beamed into millions of households (although maybe it was and I was watching the other side).

Yer dirty devil.

Quote from: Shameless Custard on May 20, 2017, 12:47:40 PM
Still a millionaire though, apparently. Just with extra compost

QUICK POLL: Kate or Pippa?

I'd like Kate's face and bod, with Pippa's arse stuck on the back. If that's allowed

The answer is Kurvy Kate from her college days, of course


touchingcloth

Quote from: Shameless Custard on May 20, 2017, 12:47:40 PM
QUICK POLL: Kate or Pippa?

If this is allowed, Pippa first but with Kate watching.

The poll is for who you'd rather flay alive and lower into a vat of hot vinegar, right?

Glebe

Now that Rolf's out, Pippa's Arse has been put in protective custody.

Blue Jam

Great to see you here Attila- and I had been about to post this:



Clearly our nose-pickin', V-flickin' future king is a demon and he has already possessed his mother... Seriously, imagine having Prince George as your pageboy, and turning round to see him behind you in the aisle, looking demonic and dressed in an even more Victorian fashion than usual- I'd have nightmares.

MuteBanana

I like how he's showing the rest of them.

"Yeah I was doing this to the camera. Ain't you never seen a couple of lads holding hands before?"


touchingcloth


Attila

I don't think the nose-picking V-flicker is George -- he's also a Sinbad be-trouser'd page boy, but the nose-picker is a bit older, and his hair's different.


edited -- nose-picker is the blond kid in the middle


Attila

And he threw a temper tantrum after the ceremony






bleurgh


Shoulders?-Stomach!


Icehaven

Haha it's slashing down. I'm presuming this wedding is in the UK? No of course I'm not googling it, I can't have the internet thinking I'm a Royalist, my Facebook will fill up with adverts for plates. 

Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: Shoulders?-Stomach! on May 20, 2017, 02:08:38 PM
Pathetic troupe of doomed dweebs.

Yep. I think if I was royalty, or at least connected to it, I'd probably troll the nosy public and just get the fucker done with no guests and the minimum of witnesses rather than an ostentatious ceremony that's serialized in magazines.

Although I hate fuss so that's my ideal wedding anyway.

Attila

Which royal child is having a royal wee up the wall?


Glebe

Pippa's arse.

Sorry, I was miles away.

[nb]From her arse.[/nb]

Dannyhood91


Glebe


Jittlebags

Quote from: Attila on May 20, 2017, 12:40:24 PM
There's my tak-a-break from marking exams sorted.

Also, who is the royal nose-picker?



Is Princess Charlotte's actual dad Mickey Dolenz?

Oo, the priest looks like he's about to whip his cock out.

Nooses Give

Quote from: Glebe on May 20, 2017, 11:15:13 AM
You shouldn't have said that, mate. You shouldn't have said that.

*hopes unsucessfully that image won't haunt me forever*

You're right mate, I shouldn't have. It's all come back to me now, how it opened and closed and fidgeted and wheesed... I won't get much sleep tonight.

For whatever reason.

BlodwynPig

All rather distasteful having the minor royals looking like demented gay insane clown posse fans

Attila

Quote from: Jittlebags on May 21, 2017, 12:40:43 AM
Oo, the priest looks like he's about to whip his cock out.

This one image is the gift that keeps on giving; something new to see the more you look.

So many of the children look like a Cillian Murphy-spawned remake of Village of the Damned.

Rich Uncle Skeleton

Quote from: Jittlebags on May 21, 2017, 12:40:43 AM
Oo, the priest looks like he's about to whip his cock out.

"can ya tell what it is yet?"

MuteBanana

Older dark haired kid looks like Damien. Great. And Charlotte looks like the Queen already with that grumpy face on. Ungreate.

Blue Jam



Why did Duchess Donothing have to give Prince George a telling-off? From this week's Popbitch mailout:

Quote
   George got grumpy because he
   wasn't allowed any biscuits.
   Then he called Princess
   Charlotte a poo-poo and tried
   to push her over.

Popbitch don't believe the source is credible, but I do. I can totally imagine Prince Damian McOmenface calling someone a "poo-poo" and then trying to hurt them. Mountbatten genes in full effect.

Blue Jam

Quote from: touchingcloth on May 20, 2017, 09:37:29 AM
"What kind of stock are you having your wedding photographs printed on, Pip-Pip? Lay-flat ultra-high-grammage silk coated cardstock? Liquid digital ink on archival paper? Vellum? Vellum's nice."

"Marshmallows."

A tasty treat for you (and no, it's not some marshmallows):

Pippa Middleton and James Matthews' wedding favours included personalised fucking marshmallows

QuoteHELLO! Online can confirm that [Pippa] made sure guests left with unique wedding favours - personalised marshmallows, presumed to be from her younger brother James Middleton's business Boomf. The marshmallows were gifted to the 350 guests that attended the wedding breakfast and featured the bride and groom's initials on them.

It's no wonder as food entrepreneur James, who used to also run Nice Cakes, provided personalised cupcakes at the royal wedding in 2011.

StayPuft must be fucking gutted that he's run out of unmarried siblings to punt his crap unsold merchandise onto- his garage must be straining at the seams. Then again, James Matthews previously bailed out his pointless marshmallow printing firm after it nearly went bust, and I guess a few hundred boxes of overpriced crap sweets is a drop in the ocean to a hedge fund manager, so maybe he's got a customer for life- he certainly looked pretty happy about the union:



"Jobs a good'un."

(Biggy, look at StayPuft's hairline- it's time to get the popcorn out)

Cuellar

How the other half live, eh.

I have to make do with off the peg fucking marshmallows. And they wear out after one or two sessions.

Glebe

Quote from: Attila on May 20, 2017, 02:05:34 PM

It's like the ultimate fantasy version of England come to life... I bet even Peter Rabbit was there, the actual Peter Rabbit from fictional childrens' stories.

Quote from: Blue Jam on May 26, 2017, 03:59:49 PM

Head of the International Association of Shit for Cunts, there. "He was my north, my south..."

touchingcloth

Quote from: Blue Jam on May 26, 2017, 03:59:49 PM
Pippa Middleton and James Matthews' wedding favours included personalised fucking marshmallows

Hahahahahahahahaha.

Quote from: Blue Jam on May 26, 2017, 03:59:49 PM


Is it only me who on seeing that picture has the words of Reviewing The Situation pop into their head?

I'm reviewing the situation
Can a fella just sell mallows all his life?
All the trials and tribulations!
Need some new plans now my sisters are both wives.


(It's too early to say whether those new plans will involve picking a pocket or two, but they definitely will.)

Quote from: Blue Jam on May 26, 2017, 03:59:49 PM
Pippa Middleton and James Matthews' wedding favours included personalised fucking marshmallows

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

steve98

He pretty much has the marriage sweet-treat market sewn-up now(At least among the Aristocracy): What bride's gonna accept any brand of marshmallows other than "Middleton's" now?

Btw that's an actual "marshmallow" bloom in Middleton's lapel.