Cultural Hole Confessional

[Purple Tentacle]

Until the other night, I had never seen One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest.

Until the other week, I had never listened to Dark Side of the Moon.

I am 26.



Don't pretend, we've all got embarassing gaping holes in our cultural knowledge. Everyone has a film, book, piece of music that they KNOW they should have experienced, but for one reason or another, never got round to it.
Perhaps you've never got round to watching a James Bond film, or never read Shakespeare. Perhaps you would struggle to name 3 songs by the Beatles, or couldn't pick David Bowie out of a crowd of Bing Crosbys. Or maybe something more abstract, like you've never paddled in the sea.

No matter. In this thread, you may confess your cultural holes, and nobody shall mock. No "Oh my God, I can't BELIEEEEEEVE you don't know who Peter Sellers is" snottery, for let he that is without gaps in their cultural appreciation cast the first stone.

Oh, that's another one, I've had 'Heat' on my Sky+ box for almost 3 months now, and still not got round to watching it. I've never seen Heat. Imagine such a thing! Imagine!

[Ciarán2]

Until the other night, I had never seen One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest.

Until the other week, I had never listened to Dark Side of the Moon.

Did you like them?

I've never seen any of the "Star Wars" films, and I've never read any of the "Lord of the Rings" books. I'm 29 next week (hint hint).

[Carlos Tevez]

I've never slid down a banister.

[Purple Tentacle]

Yes and Yes.

It's embarrassing coming very very late to something that is clearly very good. You want to say "Wow, Dark Side of the Moon is a fantastic album", and people will just go "yeah, well durrrr."

[ffogems]

I've only recently been reading Titus Groan. I feel I should have read this sooner.

I've never seen Die Hard.
Or the Godfather films.
I've never seen The Day Today.

[Frinky]

I've never seen the Godfather Films.

I only last week watched all of The Armando Iannucci Shows.

I still haven't seen every episode of The Day Today.

[Purple Tentacle]

There's another aspect, of course, that I feel quite jealous of people who will get to see The Day Today (or read Titus Groan, or see Die Hard) for the first time, that they will experience the first thrill that you can never recapture upon re-watching it for the 100th time.

[mrpants]

I have never seen Rocky.  This is a huge deal according to my friends, but I haven't ever really felt the desire to hunt it out.

Not sure if counts as a cultural hole but I have never drunk Tequila in my life.

[Morrisfan82]

Christ, where to start. The Star Wars films and Ghostbusters are probably the top-of-list ones that make people do that horrible 'you've never SEEN them?!' face/shriek, as if they had a fucking plasma TV in the womb.

Everyone has a film, book, piece of music that they KNOW they should have experienced

That's the bit that gets me though, the implication that I owe something to George Lucas and Co. to make me allocate bits of my life to watching his trumped-up little school plays. They can all whistle for my attention quite frankly. (Which would work quite well actually wouldn't it.)

Edit: oh yeh, LOTR as well (books and films). And I'm quite happy with that if the Lord (whoever that is) will spare me having to sit through another fucking comedy LOTR reference. (spit)

Edit edit: I'll raise you The Godfather(s) as well.

Edit edit edit: And the Rocky(s). I'm going to press Submit now as I'll be here all day.

[Purple Tentacle]

That's the bit that gets me though, the implication that I owe something to George Lucas and Co. to make me allocate bits of my life to watching his trumped-up little school plays. They can all whistle for my attention quite frankly. (Which would work quite well actually wouldn't it.)

Well, I was thinking more of things you should have experienced to appreciate aspects of popular culture. I'd say not ever having seen "Star Wars" counts (and they're very good by the way, you SHIT) as it's kind of ingrained into so many childhoods and poor stand-up sets, while, sadly, Titus Groan might not, brilliant though it is. Ghostbusters would also probably count as a 'should have seen'.


Yeah, I suppose I AM thinking more of things where people are going to say "I can't BELIEEEEVE that you've never seen/read that!", and then scoff like mrpants did the other week when I made my Cuckoo's Nest confessional. But he's never drunk Tequila, and I've drunk so much I can no longer drink it as it has an instantaneous vomiting effect on me, so who won that, eh? Eh? EH?

[actwithoutwords]

Gah, I was just about to drop da Godfather bomb, and Muteki's edit got in ahead of me. Damn you.
I've never listened to a Bob Dylan album, or Jimi Hendrix. Or a Beatles album for that matter.
I bought 2001: A Space Odyssey a month ago and have yet to watch it.
I have not read so many books it's ridiculous.

[Deadman97]

I've never played a Zelda.

[Egyptian Feast]

I've never seen, or read, Lord Of The Rings.

[zozman]

I've got loads of these too.  

My mate was astonished that I've never seen Grease.  I've only seen the first LOTR and Godfather, I can only name about three Bob Dylan tunes and I experienced my first Morris radio show last weekend.  I've never ridden a horse (although I have ridden a camel).

[John Self]

I have never listened to The Wall.

I have never seen Gone With The Wind.

In spite of having written several essays on her, I have never read a Jane Austen novel.

I have never had one of those 'turkey twizzlers' that gastro-buff ELW10 is always raving about.

I have never even tuned into Radio 4, let alone listen to it.

I have never paid to have sex with a prostitute.

I have never really thoroughly read one of Purple Tentacle's posts.

However:

Perhaps you... couldn't pick David Bowie out of a crowd of Bing Crosbys.

I have never been so insulted in all my life.

[Totem Hokum]

I've never masturba- oh, wait.

[Frinky]

My mate was astonished that I've never seen Grease.

Jesus, I fucking envy you.

[ffogems]

I only recently got into 24. I'd quite like to get out now, but I can't.

Oooh, good one here - I only very recently played Super Mario 64.

[Carlos Tevez]

I've only got through about 5 minutes of ET as it was so boring.

[Totem Hokum]

Never seen the Godfather trilogy, nope.

Have never fully listened through a Pink Floyd or Queen album.

I have never played Halo (properly).

[Almost Yearly]

Couldn't be arsed to finish:

Lord Of The Rings, Ulysses, Catcher In The Rye, Illuminatus, bloody Perfume, oh you name it I couldn't be arsed to finish it, including every set text for English Lit O level (got a B, fuck you very much Thomas Hardy).

Not seen / listened to:

The Godfather, Blue Jam, Casablanca, Team America, etc.

No time for:

Half of The Beatles, any of The Smiths, The Fall, etc. (Northwest bands, huh, they thinks they is all that but they ain't.)



The brief is way too wide for me on this one, it's hard to know where to start and what to list, hence this laughable effort. As previously stated, I have only a pamphlet knowledge of anything; a trait I apparently share with Hitler.

[Purple Tentacle]

I have never paid to have sex with a prostitute.

Annoyingly, this was another idea for a thread, to ask who has paid for sex with a prostitute and what it was like, but using the Sinner account so people wouldn't be scared of being tutted at. However, since all that sinner-unpleasentness happened, clearly Sinner can no longer be used, and to be honest the only people I can see replying to a thread are either boasters or tutters, which would be unreadably dreadful, really.

[Almost Yearly]

Start the fucking thread stay away boy.

[DaFuzz]

I've never had sex (Gaping hole).

[clareQuilty]

In spite of having written several essays on her, I have never read a Jane Austen novel.

Hahaha, same here! God knows I've tried, and I'm an English student. Thing is, I got quite good marks by just using wikipedia and quotes taken at random to support my argument.
I don't think you actually have to read any of her stuff.

I've never seen Gone With The Wind or listened to Blood On The Tracks.
I'm surprised that i've pretty much seen all of the stuff mentioned, but a hell of a lot of it ('Godfather' '2001'...) I found grossly overrated.

[Eight Taiwanese Teenagers]

I only saw One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest last week, as well. It was excellent!

I've heard lots of Pink Floyd at friends' houses but never known what album was what or thought it was great...

I've never listened to Led Zeppelin.

[John Self]

Yeah, I remember that prozzie-thread suggestion, and I thought it was a pretty good idea too, an interesting topic. It was Circusfire suggested it, wasn't it?

to be honest the only people I can see replying to a thread are either boasters or tutters, which would be unreadably dreadful, really.

Well that's a bit judgemental- you're claiming to know how these despicable desperate and sordid mens' minds would work, are you? SHAME ON YOU PURPLE TENTACLE- SHAME, ON, YOU!![/b]

[Captain Crunch]

another idea for a thread, to ask who has paid for sex with a prostitute and what it was like

It would rapidly descend into a sludgy yawnfest because some tit would wade in claiming that marriage was prostitution and all men pay in the end and blah blah blah.

I'd agree that these 'Cultural Holes' are just a kind of tick box exercise for the feeble.  I still feel guilty for always going for a slash during Bonham's solo in 'The Song Remains The Same' though.

[Frinky]

I'd agree that these 'Cultural Holes' are just a kind of tick box exercise for the feeble.  I still feel guilty for always going for a slash during Bonham's solo in 'The Song Remains The Same' though.

I think the popular anecdote goes along that the toilets would always crowd up for the full 20 minutes during Moby Dick, so don't worry about it.

[Neville Chamberlain]

Haven't seen any Harry Potter films - why the fuck should I??? I couldn't care less about some jumped-up little twat at some posh school.

Haven't seen any of the Lord of the Rings - why the fuck should I??? I couldn't care less about some daft racist fantasy world populated by twatty little dwarves and white supremacists.

Only watched one Star Wars film (might have been Return of the Jedi) and it was shite.

And it's funny all this talk of Dark Side of the Moon. As a self-confessed prog-head, I thought it was about time I gave this a spin. It was, as I suspected, a total snoozefest that made me want to kick my speakers in. Like all post-Syd Floyd - absolutely bloody awful.

I have never seen Ghostbusters either nor have I watched a single post Roger Moore Bond film.