£125,000,000

[Bogey]

I'd get a flight from Sydney to LA!

[Jaffit]

I was discussing the probability of winning the euromillions lottery with a friend the other day.

The odds of winning are 76 million to one right. The jackpot is 100 million. So surely if you had 76 million to spend you could buy every single combination of numbers, guaranteeing you win the jackpot and scooping a tidy 14 million pound profit.

Any budding mathmeticians care to highlight any flaws in my fiendish plan?

[mayer]

Multiple winners.

[butnut]

Also, it would take far too long to buy 76 million numbers. If you bought 2 a second, for 24 hours a day, it would still take 439.8 days to buy them all according to my possibly faulty maths.

[Jaffit]

Yeah i thought about that but there havent been any jackpot winners at all since november and the number of tickets bought reached record levels this week.

Plus im not taking into account all the smaller prizes youd win for getting say 5 numbers plus 2 lucky stars (which works out around £300,000 a pop). You would have every single combination covered remember so you would win EVERY smaller prize possible.

[Jaffit]

Also, it would take far too long to buy 76 million numbers. If you bought 2 a second, for 24 hours a day, it would still take 439.8 days to buy them all according to my possibly faulty maths.

You could hire some tramps or something to sit 24 hours a day at lottery outlets and pay them in used fag ends and half cans of tennants super. Ive got that boxed off.

[butnut]

How would you ensure that the tramps never bought the same ticket across the country? Would you give each one his/her own particular combination of numbers to buy? That level of organisation would take years and years to set up, by which point half of your well trained tramps could be dead.

[TraceyQ]

If any of you lot win it, will you pay off my credit cards and my overdraft, please?

[Go With The Flow]

I'd fund some decent television and films in Britain.

And do stuff like get a homeless man a haircut/wash etc, and then dress him up in a pimp suit.

[TraceyQ]

And make him dance!

[Frinky]

Frinky, I think you're underestimating severely the amount of money railways cost these days.

I think you're underestimating the power of the blackmail!


CHOO CHOO

[butnut]

I now picture Frinky as that guy who lives in luxury on his train in 'Once Upon A Time in The West.' I just hope Frinky doesn't suffer the same fate as that man.

[TraceyQ]

Such a child. Why can't you spend it on grown up things like high heeled shoes that go clack on the floor, a hat with a feather and chocolate fountain?

[Jaffit]

How would you ensure that the tramps never bought the same ticket across the country? Would you give each one his/her own particular combination of numbers to buy? That level of organisation would take years and years to set up, by which point half of your well trained tramps could be dead.

Im sure theres a supercomputer somewhere capable of assigning each tramp with a set of numbers and it wouldnt take longer than a day.

Or considering you can buy tickets online, why not set up network of computers that sits there buying tickets all day?

Im about to go and order a snazzy new helicopter as we speak...

[Frinky]

My train has gullwing doors, and in each carriage, there is a young debutante, each one posher than the last.

[TraceyQ]

All in-bred, like? Chuh. You wont be laughing when that plum in their mouth turns into a PLUM FOR A HEAD.

[Frinky]

You wish you were a home counties hussy, with a pair of shoes to match every pony. Jimmy Choo shoes.

CHOO CHOO

[TraceyQ]

Like I wish I had the pox.

[Frinky]

You want the Choos.

[butnut]

I reckon they would be able to detect such a sudden mass buying of tickets and put a stop to your fun.

Is it illegal to buy ALL the combination of numbers in a lottery? I'm sure I remember them talking about this when the lottery first appeared here.

[Frinky]

See what I did here

[TraceyQ]

It looks rubbish when you edit it afterwards, you know? Everyone thinks "Oh, look at Mr. Afterthought over there, not as funny as he thinks, is he? I'll bet he has pretend arguments in the mirror, thinking ' I Wish I'd said that, people would think I was so cool and probably make me King'," but really, really we all laugh at choo.

[Frinky]

Actually, I'd enter into the Barrett-Jackson auction and I'd buy this and this.

[TraceyQ]

Much more like it. Can I be Una Stubbs?

[Frinky]

I'd take a punt at this one, too

[TraceyQ]

Will you pass your driving test before or after you buy these?

[Lee]

According to The Times' Rich List 2005, £100,000,000 would make you the 384th richest person in the country. I think that might be enough of an achievement for me.

[Doctor Stamen]

I'd buy a 1970 Dodge Challenger and a bird of prey.  Probably a falcon or something.

[Frinky]

bird of prey

Good call.

[Cardinal Tit Storm]

I'd buy a 1974 Ford Falcon and dodge tax