Author Topic: I know someone who owns a little dog  (Read 3841 times)

gazzyk1ns

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I know someone who owns a little dog
« on: October 26, 2006, 10:36:39 PM »
...And it is named "Marcus". However, due to the fact that it tends to bark incessantly when strangers are around, I have hilariously nicknamed it "Barkus". I thought you might like to know this, because as you have undoubtedly realised by now, that is the same as your surname. Have you ever owned a dog?

Aubrey Barkus

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Re: I know someone who owns a little dog
« Reply #1 on: October 27, 2006, 02:26:14 PM »
Quote from: "gazzyk1ns"
...And it is named "Marcus". However, due to the fact that it tends to bark incessantly when strangers are around, I have hilariously nicknamed it "Barkus". I thought you might like to know this, because as you have undoubtedly realised by now, that is the same as your surname. Have you ever owned a dog?


How interesting that we seem to have a small canine theme emerging.  Slap-Head-Suck-Black-Cock (to use his Indian name) was most insistent about my Rover and now this about a dog too!
But to answer your question, I have had all manner of pets in my time but never any luck with a single one of them.  Wilson the gerbil (cancer).  Mr Tibby the cat (38 bus to Hackney Central). Grubs the chihuahua (Mr Hiss).  Mr Hiss the snake (Bisected by VW Camper van door.  "Don't worry, maybe they regenerate like worms!"  No, they don't.) Andy and Sue, Zebra Finches (sat on by drunk child).  Mr Wilson and Capt. Mainwaring, Chinchillas (little nimble toes in electrical sockets; "KerBlammo!") Rolf  the weasel (toilet), Arthur Mullard, adopted seal at Gweek seal sanctuary (killed by falling microlight)  Oh, how I wish they were all with me now!  Apart from the smell and the noise and the expense and the fighting and the complaints.  
So, maybe what happened was best after all.  
Apart from Millard Fillmore the mouse.  No animal  deserves to be trapped in an industrial laminator.  
Though he does make a very handy coaster, if you can bear the imploring eyes peering up at you every time you raise your drink.

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