"Students"....

[Phillippe Lambert]

Whilst I don't want this to be rant rant rant thread, (and in the spirit of new threads, since I'm sure this has been done to death, but there's a semi-point really!), I really do hate "students". By that, I don't mean each and every young person who goes to university (I was one until recently), but your stereotypical "student". You know the types. Those who like things because they're "cool", and "alternative". AKA they want to look pretentious. But then equally those other types of students, who are "wacky" and "zany". I've always struggled to put this into words without handy examples to point out, until today, whilst browsing my uni's facebook group, (see, I really was one), when someone had posted this abhorrence of a message:

Get Birmingham Recognised!!! Everyone send videos of your funny pranks to //www.studentpranks.com. We need to cement birmingham uni's place at the top of the funniest uni league coz at the moment even UCE are beating us and im not gonna stand for that!
Stay Classy Birmingham uni

Naturally, I went to have a look at the aforementioned website and my god, is it one of the most depressing sites I've ever visited. I met some great people at uni, but there are far too many of these sorts of people. Whereas as youtube is a vent for the bored classes to show off their general tedium/idiocy messing around with their minibikes in the playground, it really does concern me that some of these people are going to be the people who end up being our (my) boss.

Whilst I'm clearly too young to be able to hark back to the days when university was about reading the classics, etc etc, it disturbs me that it has become all too frequent an occurrence that generally well educated people (I mean of a standard to get into what is regarded as a good university), behave in these ways. Naturally I'm not saying that we haven't all done this kind of thing to and extent, but from my experience at university this website really encapsulates how atrocious the level of student-dom has become.

I think I've lost my thread slightly, and have actually just ended up ranting, but do please use your verbwhores wit and wisdom to create something of this thread. And do please go to the site, I feel the "Top Videos" section really is a fantastically pertinent example of the depressing level of student life nowadays.

Here endeth the sermon.

[Artemis]

It's just young people messing about, leave them alone. I'm sure if you thought hard enough, like me you could come up with plenty of reasons to hate almost every group in society. Take this one for instance: people who drone on about hating students because they have a hard time coming to terms with the ever more obvious fading of their youth. Take another one: 30-something men who have yet to grow out of this 'pissed up wanker' phase.

Pissing about, acting like a dickhead and liking things for the sake of it because they're 'zany' or subversive is just a part of being young - it's not something specific to students, though I live in probably the most densley populated area of students in the country, and I can forgive you for think it is. But it's not. For every twat who gets drunk and punches a street sign, there's another kind of quieter student but you don't see them on internet video sites so you don't categorise that person as a student, but they exist, as well you should know, being one once yourself.

PS Is it wrong that I found the top video quite amusing (the 'cop shove' one)?

[Milo]

When I was at uni there was one girl who started wearing a poncho about a year before the short-lived poncho madness occurred and was outraged (yet I suspect secretly pleased) when lots of other people started wearing them. She thought she was great and got a Third for her degree, which made me chuckle.

The moral is, the students who are most arseholey do receive justice and so hatred is wasted.

Where I work, however, is overrun with students and this leads me to dislike them just for getting in the way all the time - but that's just my problem rather than anything they're doing wrong. I suppose I should have expected it, working in a university and all.

[Labian Quest]

The pranks that I could be bothered to watch on that site were rubbish, not even pranks really just people pissing about, and I suspect this thread is in fact just a feeble attempt to generate more hits for someone's website. :p

Regarding students generally though, they don't bother me much and I can't really understand why people work themselves up into a lather about them, especially these days when they're funding most of their education themselves.

[Pinball]

That's Studentwang.

[Lt Plonker]

I think it was Virgin, who set up a scheme many months ago called the Virgin Mobile Show Off. It was, pretty much, a talent contest with no criteria or standards expected. Our student bar was partaking in the event, and spent maybe an hour desperately trying to round up the very few of us that were in the bar that Friday night.

They eventually rounded up a terrible looking bunch and kicked off the event with... Gervais Dance. Do your best Ricky Gervais dance.  Both me and my friend Mike looked at eachother with despair and promptly remained slack-jawed at the sight of these grotesque, beer-addled orangutans who through their arms about on stage like they were on fire. The rythmic grunting echoed pathetically around the bar. The second contestant got a a bit carried away and punched a hole in the ceiling, prompting the bar manager to come over and threaten them to stop the event from carrying on.

Sadly, they were let off, and more hobbledehoys were allowed to gyrate ridiculously on stage. The host, a lovely but desperate girl, tried to get the bar to cheer them on and was rewarded with some Gervais-chanting, but silence from our table. One guy decided to buck the trend and do his best Carlton, from Fresh Prince, which was terrible.
The round was about to end with the last contestant. The lovely host, turned to him, now sitting down back in his seat, gestured him on stage to be wacky, to which he very quietly gestured "No thanks" and carried on drinking.

I watched from behind my fingers!!!!!!

Still, it made for a memorable evening. I'm still slightly confused that the actual student host made certain assumptions about what other students like to do! Gervais dance? That sounds well good.

[aaaaaaaaaargh!]

Please post that in CC Plonker, please.

[rudi]

Judging by the tiny number of votes on the site, I'm assuming the lead-off post is simply there to direct traffic to said site.

Is that too cynical?

And such quality too - the third ranked 'prank' is Boris Johnson drinking a shot.

Ker-azy!

There's 3 minutes of my life I'll never get back...

[Hypnotoad.]

Judging by the tiny number of votes on the site, I'm assuming the lead-off post is simply there to direct traffic to said site.

Is that too cynical?

And such quality too - the third ranked 'prank' is Boris Johnson drinking a shot.

Ker-azy!

There's 3 minutes of my life I'll never get back...

Well, he does link to it 3 FUCKING TIMES

[neveragain]

I've only recently started university life and am drawn to admit there are an awful lot of... people who don't think enough, that seems to be the kindest phrase. Stop saying everything's 'lol random' (yes, some of these people say 'lol' as if it was an actual word) and stop going on about your boring, sodding night out. Oh, and keep the fucking noise down as well - if you're reading this - as you laugh far too long into the dusk. Most are genuinely nice though, so these complaints are tiny but the with the propensity to mount up.

My advice, which has started to work quite although let's see if it keeps up: once you find someone similar who's friendly, and that you like, for Christ's sake hang onto them. This goes for all other aspects of life as well.

[hencole]

Students in general are naive idiots. Not quite adult in their thinking they take a blindingly simplistic view of life, in part due to having little responsibilities.  Not that this is a bad thing, it's just that they really don't realise how stupid they come across until they're a few years older.

[23 Daves]

Students in general are naive idiots. Not quite adult in their thinking they take a blindingly simplistic view of life, in part due to having little responsibilities.  Not that this is a bad thing, it's just that they really don't realise how stupid they come across until they're a few years older.

You're not wrong there, Henry.  I used to get infuriated as a student when people used to sneer at me "You'll realise I'm right when you get out into the real world" but in actual fact, they were very often right.  I don't think being a student gives you much experience of what day-to-day working life is like or even society in general, where you'd be forced to mix with a wide variety of people of different backgrounds and ages, and not just the particular bunch of folk who all happen to have exactly the same interests as you and happen to be the same age as well (more often than not).

On the other hand, I wasn't a particularly whacky, wanky student myself, and nor were my friends.  If we were guilty of anything at all it was probably excessive idealism and ridiculous levels of optimism about our futures.  There again, I think if you don't go through a phase of your life like that then you are missing out a bit, so I wouldn't begrudge anyone else the same experience.

[wheatgod]

There are irresponsible, simplistic people outside of universities too, you know.

[Emergency Lalla Ward Ten]

Students in general are naive idiots. Not quite adult in their thinking they take a blindingly simplistic view of life, in part due to having little responsibilities.  Not that this is a bad thing, it's just that they really don't realise how stupid they come across until they're a few years older.

What sort of opinions are you referring to?

[Brutus Beefcake]

Probably Rick from the Young Ones type stuff.

[The Duck Man]

On Thursday I went on a drink with the editorial staff of the University magazine, which I write for on occassion.

Imagine my horror when I found out that all of them were Tories, and two were members of Tory Soc. All but one were quite nice people, but the conversation about politics was truely horrible to behold. Cunt: "The Liberals are only there because there has to be a third party, there's no actual point to them, they'll never get elected."

He then went on to bray about traffic wardens and how the bastards issued a ticket to his Daddy-funded-car (because the Uni magazine is essentially "contribute what you like" he does a page on flash cars that is relevant to no-one but him). He admitted that he was parked on double-yellows, but they were bastards because the double yellows were in a stupid place.

[buttgammon]

You're fucking right! Those fuckin' students are a bunch of fuckin' cunts. I saw a load of fuckin' students the other day, so I fuckin' smashed their middle class faces in! Bag 'o shite!

Sorry, but I think that post was unproductive even by my lower-than-ground-level standards!

[pandadeath]

I shall be going to Uni next year at the grand old age of 20 and I am dreading the socialising. I just want to go to study film, not steal traffic cones every night and sleep with Tory-ass women.

I think i'll just hole up in my room with a load of books, dvds and a komputor and wait it out for three years.

[23 Daves]

I shall be going to Uni next year at the grand old age of 20 and I am dreading the socialising. I just want to go to study film, not steal traffic cones every night and sleep with Tory-ass women.

I think i'll just hole up in my room with a load of books, dvds and a komputor and wait it out for three years.

That's what a surprising volume of students do, though.  I had a couple of friends who didn't seem to do much other than study and watch films.  Their sex lives were woeful as a result, but then mine wasn't exactly much better for all the socialising I did.

It is what you make it, basically.  You're going to be in an institution filled with people from all walks of life - all right, all walks of middle class life - with a wide variety of interests. One thing I will say in favour of university is that I've never met so many people in one place at one time who i've felt a kind of kinship with.  My closest friend stems from my university days, and not from my schooldays or my subsequent working years.  Therefore, I would say that if you go into hiding you're possibly missing out on mixing with a load of people who you will actually have a lot in common with, even if they do take a while to materialise (I didn't meet the best people until three quarters of the way through the first year).  

I was a year older than most of my fellow students when I went, so there were a few minor differences for me in the first year as well - for instance, I had actuallly gone out and got trashed numerous times before and taken drugs, so I didn't think either activities were rebellious or original, and I didn't titter about how "naughty" I was being or brag about it constantly.  

Anyway, the point is I happen to think that the first year at university is the worst.  Weather that and you're away. Everyone is away from home for the first time, possibly away from their controlling parents (if this applies) and goes a tiny bit "Mental!"  But it gets a lot better after that.  And trust me, it's a whole lot better than what preceeded it or what is to follow.

[Blue Jam]

The moral is, the students who are most arseholey do receive justice and so hatred is wasted.

Very true. I know too many people who became alcoholics while at uni and none of them were doing too well on their courses. One had to repeat a year which was pretty costly for him and he narrowly avoided getting thrown off the course.

I think I drank too much in my second year but it was mainly because I found a lot of the zany stuff tedious and couldn't enjoy going to certain pubs and the studen union unless I was hammered. I hope I wasn't an arsehole, I certainly wasn't lazy or privileged- I was too poor to have to pay fees and worked for various events catering firms, waiting tables to pay the rent. I reckon that point about students not experiencing different cultures may be valid- most seemed to get jobs in pubs frequented by other students but I mainly worked with people from overseas, at events all over London. That said I do hate it when people call post-uni life "The Real World"- I find it horribly patronising, because uni never felt easy to me and my time there certainly wasn't carefree and relaxed, mainly because I was worried about paying the rent and bills, just like anyone who works.

[23 Daves]

I think I attended university in one of the last feasible years where you could technically just about get by on a grant and some holiday work, so the criticisms levelled at me about "The Real World" were probably halfway fair - even if they did mostly come from my patronising sod of an older brother (who left school with one GCSE and is now a top "sales director").

There is a yawning gap between office life and student life too, I think.  It definitely took me time to get used to it.  I think I had quite a severe post-grad comedown.  For a start, in university lofty arguments are encouraged in projects and seminars, but try that as a member of admin staff for Lloyds TSB and you'll be in for a really big shock (not that I did, but you take my point all the same).  In university you're encouraged to be inventive and expressive, whereas in most offices you have to wait a few years to even be taken halfway seriously, unless you're really lucky.

[Ciarán2]

Just last night, I was talking to a friend about university and so on, and between us we came up with an idea for a thesis. The working title we were thinking of was "Academia and the Colony" or "The Colonial Academe". And the subtitle would be something like "The Role of Trinity College In Colonial Ireland". To our knowledge that hasn't been done. The questions that preoccupy both of us are "What do universities do? What does this or that university specifically do, and what historical contribution has it made to society?" Trinity College is very interesting in that regard. It was the intellectual powerhouse of colonial Ireland, students from Trinity (a protestant, British institution) opposed the 1916 uprising and actually shot at the rebels from the rooftops of the college. Trintiy produced great writers, most of whom supported the Free State and opposed Collins in the Civil War; Douglas Hyde, W.B.Yeats, etc. But it also produced the vile hanging judges, it was supported by and in turn was supported by the institutions which kept Ireland a class-riddled society; the medical, clerical and juridical institutions. So any good it has done for the State is kind of balanced out at least by the bad. This isn't a strictly republican argument, after all Yeats and his pals claimed to be a republican. It's more a mix of history and philosophy in questioning the role of an academic institution in a colonial state.

Er, yes. Why have I typed that out? Oh yes. Students. The question of what students do, is an interesting one I think. How has the role of the student changed over the years? What is the role of the university as an institution in society? How is it related to things like the Police, the Parliament, and all of the other institutions? All very broad questions, but hmm I think they're interesting ones.

[Pinball]

The government seems to view uni as a numbers game. They are obsessed with us matching the number of graduates churned out by China and India.

[Emergency Lalla Ward Ten]

I always felt I attended university in a sort of changeover period. It was 1992-95: the pragmatic/career-fixated attitude hadn't quite set in, but the radicalism and learning-for-its-own-sake appraoch was also considered a bit old hat. A lot of us didn't really know why we were there.

When the union held huge meetings about political matters, 90%+ students turned up. That's probably unimaginable now.

I do remember being slightly astonished that there were Tory students though.

[Hoogstraten'sSmilingUlcer]

I was thinking about this last night. I have a monomanical hatred of students - not all, obviously, just the majority of the pushy, arrogant, egotistical jumped up shits, some of whom will be curing us, drilling our teeth, writing opinion pages, loaning us money and running the country one day. The number of morons - actual morons - I've met is astonishing. I was talking to someone who had never heard of the Holocaust, and had heard of 9/11 but couldn't really say what it was; the phrase "How the fuck did you get in?" springs to mind. I live with someone who puts notes around the house, like "Please do not leave dirty cutlery on the kitchen table" and "If you are washing up, please do ALL the washing up in the sink." I don't mind washing up or keeping a tidy house, but you don't have to leave little fucking notes around the house, chiding us into your nightmare world of Hyacinth Bucket pretention. I pray she never has children; some gene pools should not meant to be continued. Apologies if this makes me sound like a cynical old bastard, but, in the words of Neil Simon, if there is one thing I cannot stand, it is little notes. Quite a few students (that I know, so not necessarily representative of all students everywhere) here are the stereotypical Guardian-reading, knee-jerk "There's human rights violations in our very kitchen" kind of people, and to be honest, I find the 'right-wing' students more interesting. The whole hypocritical slopbucket of cr-azee students can go fuck themselves, but sadly, quite a few of them are going to become good doctors, businessmen, teachers and what have you. Actually, they'll probably be better adults than they are students; ah, the folly of youth.

Ok, rant over.

[23 Daves]

At my old university, we had unbelievable volumes of shit students clogging up the place.  It was because it was an ex-poly that people from certain public schools went to if they absolutely couldn't get in anywhere else.  They were known, quite obviously and unimaginatively, as the "Tim Nice But Dims" by the rest of us.  They'd spend their time wandering around, voting Tory, and looking quite red-cheeked and bemused by everything.  I think ours was the only Student Union to actually return Conservative Society members into posts of responsibility through an election.  There also used to be this fat posh rugby playing twat who used to glare at me from across the union bar because he knew I voted Labour and was in the Labour Society.  He threatened to beat my mate up on the night of the 1997 General Election because he was a bit too pleased with the result.  Classy.

We also depended on Greek students a lot to boost the university's income, and they didn't really fit any usual demographic as well.  They were often from wealthy families and would wander around in very smart clothes doing the English experience not really bothering to socialise or get involved with the rest of us.  One of the Greek women I lived in Halls with used to tut and sigh at all the English menfolk for their shabby dress sense.

They're increasingly odd and diverse institutions now, aren't they?  It's got to be really difficult to use the word "student" as a generalisation.  I remember meeting people studying medical subjects whilst over from Jamaica and Kenya, Engineering Students with full timetables who'd barely get a chance to go out on the piss (and often didn't take it up even when they did, as they seemed to loathe the rest of the student population), art students who'd arrogantly cross-question every damn thing you did, wasters who came in from clearing then never attended a single lecture, only to disappear at the end of the first year... Back when I worked in a university (last year) I was also always shocked by how seriously everyone seemed to be taking it.  Walk into the cafeteria, and you could almost smell the final essay angst.  I don't remember any of that, though I'm sure it went on.  My memories are of people just getting on with it (though a better brain data-scan does reveal memories of friends of mine being close to tears with dissertation work, so that's almost certainly not correct.  You tend to only remember the good bits).

Actually, if I won the lottery tomorrow, I'd probably piss off back to university just for the hell of it, if only so I could get easy access to the brilliant libraries some of them have.

[Pinball]

I spent 6 years at uni, and since then regularly travel to various universities to discuss/coordinate research projects. For what it's worth my general impression is that students are pushed much harder now, and the general feeling is "it's too much like hard work". When I was at uni, I spent most of the time in extracurricular activities, and had a dozen papers published, and took part as a guinea pig in trials etc. before I graduated. Nowadays, with curriculae as they are, I don't know if I could do that.

Conversely, the fact that nearly half of young people go to uni now has made generalisations very difficult, and daresay brought the average down.

[Frinky]

6 years?


Were you imprisoned?

[Frinky]

We also depended on Greek students a lot to boost the university's income, and they didn't really fit any usual demographic as well.  They were often from wealthy families and would wander around in very smart clothes doing the English experience not really bothering to socialise or get involved with the rest of us.  One of the Greek women I lived in Halls with used to tut and sigh at all the English menfolk for their shabby dress sense.

The Greek students I used to live with would trim thier pubes in the communal shower and not clear up the mess after themselves, so when Frinky took a shower without his glasses on he'd wonder why the water wasn't running away and was reaching upto his ankles, and think that he'd have a squint and move away that odd black blockage OH GOD NO


We didn't get the rich Greeks, obviously. Ours just sat in the kitchen and smoked, for days on end, without moving. You could smell them from outside of the halls.

[Pinball]

6 years?


Were you imprisoned?

Two degrees. It did feel like prison towards the end, though ;-)