Author Topic: Verbwhores' Radio Times  (Read 45003 times)

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« on: February 04, 2004, 12:00:35 AM »
Imagine, if you will, an edition of the Radio Times edited entirely by the members of this forum. Entries for comedy in the TV listings would become hideously expanded, whilst the ITV column would dwindle away to almost nothing. Radio will be similarly improved, with extensive comedy footnotes and the purging of all references to Dead Ringers.

The letters page would feature correspondence on Gertrude Stein, John Cage and an endurance reality TV wanking challenge. News Agents would be forced to relocate the magazine to the top shelf after the editor's controversial placing of a Michael Jackson/goatse mong on the front cover.

Sales would plummet, the editors would be sacked. Alison Graham would resume her rein of middle-brow shiteness.

But imagine no more, for I am initiating this thread due to (some measure of) popular demand. Basically, stick your notifications of good or interesting stuff on the telly or radio on this thread. Think of it as 'links to cool programmes'.

Stick anything you like in, but hopefully stuff that you think other people might not have noticed.

Frinky

  • Enormous chip on shoulder stemming from insurmountable superiority complex
Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #1 on: February 04, 2004, 12:21:34 AM »
Bump in the hope of Stickyfying?

easytarget

  • five gas lighters for a pound
Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #2 on: February 04, 2004, 05:13:50 AM »
On BBC7

Jeremy Hardy Speaks To The Nation  

Wed 4 Feb, 23:30 - 00:00  30 mins

How To Be An Adult: The estimable Mr Hardy launches us on the long journey towards maturity with this invaluable guide to adulthood.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/bbc7/

This is a really good show, Jeremy Hardy is brilliant.

There was a particularly good bit at the end of his show on Radio 4 last year in the question and answer section:

(after an audience member explained that you can get extra radio stations through your cable tv box)
JH: I could. Then I could put the telly on, listen to radio 7 and then stare at a blank screen, it’d be pointless but better than watching Dead Ringers
<audience cheers>
“Hello I’m Nigella Lawson”, I’m glad you told me I wouldn’t have had a bloody clue otherwise.

Ace.

Lt Plonker

  • Never forget.
    • Graymation
Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #3 on: February 04, 2004, 06:06:06 PM »
BBC Four 09/02/04
21.00
Tetris: From Russia with Love
The story of how a simple computer game developed by a programmer at Moscow's Academy of Science prompted a global battle for financial rights with billions of dollars at stake.
Quoted from DigiGuide

Sounds really interesting and I shall be watching as soon as it comes onto BBC2. :(

NaN

    • http://www.silvereye.co.uk
Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #4 on: February 05, 2004, 12:47:36 AM »
it's times like these that i'm willing to get on my knees and pray for a decent non-digital exclusive show...

why? why must you mock me so?

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #5 on: February 05, 2004, 12:49:07 AM »
This is a chuffing brilliant idea. Now I'll finally know what's worth watching/hearing, as I'm not a huge TV/radio-head these days. Monkey Dust is one of the few things I go out of my way to see these days.

imitationleather

  • "The French... are famous... for their kissing"
    • http://last.fm/user/ImiLeathr
Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #6 on: February 05, 2004, 03:34:18 AM »
Talk to the Hand
Every sodding night
Ftn
3.45am

Ah yes, this is what Freeview's all about. Simply appalling yoof discussion show presented by a scary looking woman with an afro and a less-convincing cockney accent than Jamie Oliver. Oh, they discuss all the issues! He's no good for you, drugs, double standards, fans of Westlife, it's all in there.

Every episode has a hippy type with pink hair who goes on about "healing people with colour" and how she was an outcast in drama school because "everyone was jealous of her". Yeah, that's right daahlin. It wouldn't have anything to do with you being one of the most annoying people alive and that every second spent in your company is more dangerous than taking a shower is Auschwitz, would it?

What's even funnier is that as you watch more and more episodes you see the same guests being repeated over and over again, but just with different names. And that's not all, throughout the show there are vox pops with people supposedly going about their business in town. Nothing strange about that, you may think, and you'd be right. But then you realise that they have all been on the show as guests in previous episodes!

Must see television. Watch it before Charlie Brooker writes about it in his column next week (hoho!).

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #7 on: February 05, 2004, 04:42:47 AM »
CHARLIE BROOKER! Oh, Zeppotron's favoured son, how thou hast fallen. Mind you, I still love him so.

Le Trotter Noir.
BBC 1
Friday, 9PM-Close

Controversial French art-house version of the classic grifter's sitcom. Del boy runs in slow motion on an elaborate treadmill comprised of aborted foetuses while Rodney masturbates Grandad to climax with a hollowed cucumber. Another blistering satire from directorial veteran Pierre 'Etension, ideal for fans of BBC2's "The Office".

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #8 on: February 05, 2004, 09:53:13 AM »
I am so fucking pissed off at that Tetris programme being stuck on BBC4, especially as when it finally gets round to being on BBC2 it will be broadcast at one in the morning.

Cunts, cunts.


Would someone be a dear and point out when it's coming on normal telly?

And didn't the BBC get into a load of shit for running Eastenders a day early on BBC Choice because they're a public service, and showing "exclusive" popular shows on digital before terrestrial was a breach of their remit?

Why doesn't this apply to decent programmes?

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #9 on: February 05, 2004, 11:52:15 AM »
Get into the habit of listening to BBC Radio 4 comedy

Weekdays: 6.30pm

Saturday: 12.30pm

Here's a link for what's on and off air:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/comedy/

Well worth it as many of these programmes eventually transfer to BBC2 and it will give you a chance to lord it over all the johnny come latelys who foolishly believe that the television version is the first time the nation became aware of a programme.

You may continue listening to Heart FM the rest of the time.

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #10 on: February 05, 2004, 12:11:46 PM »
The Tragic Roundabout

Alan Partridge 'bounces back' for this new series focusing CCTV-captured accident black spots at some of Britain's busiest roundabouts.

The format, put together by Partridge himself, includes interviews with maimed drivers or bereaved relatives.  Alan invites viewers with interactive remotes to join in by trying to identify the models of featured car wrecks, and guessing what music was likely to be on the stereo.

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #11 on: February 05, 2004, 01:24:05 PM »
I think the point of this thread is to warn people about real programmes, not make up amusing pitches for non-existent ones. There was a thread for the latter on the old board - maybe someone should start another...

Tom Rad

  • This line intentionally left blank
Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #12 on: February 05, 2004, 03:10:55 PM »
Quote from: "Purple Tentacle"
I am so fucking pissed off at that Tetris programme being stuck on BBC4, especially as when it finally gets round to being on BBC2 it will be broadcast at one in the morning.

Cunts, cunts.


Would someone be a dear and point out when it's coming on normal telly?


I''ll second that.

Quote
And didn't the BBC get into a load of shit for running Eastenders a day early on BBC Choice because they're a public service, and showing "exclusive" popular shows on digital before terrestrial was a breach of their remit?

Why doesn't this apply to decent programmes?


Why indeed? I'm not sure about this, but I was under the impression that Channel 4's public service remit requires them to broadcast the programs they have on their cable/digital channel E4 on the terrestial Channel 4 as well, eventually (cf. all their American comedy/drama imports like Friends and Six Feet Under which were first shown on E4 and then much later on C4). Is this right? And if it is, does it apply to the BBC, too?

Ambient Sheep

  • Take thine own advice!
Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #13 on: February 05, 2004, 03:23:26 PM »
Quote from: "jutl"
I think the point of this thread is to warn people about real programmes, not make up amusing pitches for non-existent ones.

Yes, but I thought the latter myself at first, as that's what the description looks like at first, it's only in the fourth paragraph that it becomes clear what the purpose is.  Perhaps some rearranging of the initial post (not yours, I know) would help.

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #14 on: February 05, 2004, 03:54:39 PM »
Quote from: "Purple Tentacle"
I am so fucking pissed off at that Tetris programme being stuck on BBC4, especially as when it finally gets round to being on BBC2 it will be broadcast at one in the morning.

Cunts, cunts.



A Freeview box (which will give you BBC4 forever) costs as little as £60 - the equivalent of ___ packets of fags.  ( Well I dunno, I don't smoke. )

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #15 on: February 05, 2004, 04:06:43 PM »
Quote from: "Shaddock"
Quote from: "Purple Tentacle"
Cunts, cunts.


A Freeview box (which will give you BBC4 forever) costs as little as £60 - the equivalent of ___ packets of fags.  ( Well I dunno, I don't smoke. )[/b]


Hehe, you should work for Comic Relief.


"This is Purple Tentacle. He is without digital television. For just £60, he, and thousands like him, can watch Eastenders: Revealed! and Liquid News for up to 80 years. Next time you buy a packet of fags, think about Purple Tentacle."


As I've said before, I get a very very good terrestrial signal where I live, and due to over-compression thanks to the God and wanking channels I find the digital picture incredibly poor-quality, like bloody Realvideo.

[Major Misunderstanding] No sir, you can wave that can in my face all you want, you'll not get a penny out of me.

imitationleather

  • "The French... are famous... for their kissing"
    • http://last.fm/user/ImiLeathr
Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #16 on: February 05, 2004, 04:10:09 PM »
You can't watch Liquid News for much longer. It's been AXED!

*Swooshing axe sound effect*

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #17 on: February 05, 2004, 04:18:09 PM »
Quote from: "Purple Tentacle"
Quote from: "Shaddock"
Quote from: "Purple Tentacle"
Cunts, cunts.


A Freeview box (which will give you BBC4 forever) costs as little as £60 - the equivalent of ___ packets of fags.  ( Well I dunno, I don't smoke. )[/b]


Hehe, you should work for Comic Relief.


"This is Purple Tentacle. He is without digital television. For just £60, he, and thousands like him, can watch Eastenders: Revealed! and Liquid News for up to 80 years. Next time you buy a packet of fags, think about Purple Tentacle."

As I've said before, I get a very very good terrestrial signal where I live, and due to over-compression thanks to the God and wanking channels I find the digital picture incredibly poor-quality, like bloody Realvideo.


Well, Mr. Purple if you send me a private message with your address, I'll attempt to send you a video recording of the programme  -- my video timer works 9 times out of 10.

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #18 on: February 05, 2004, 05:16:15 PM »
From Vic and Bob.net....
Quote
The new 'make or break' R&M television project, Catterick, begins 15th February on BBC3

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #19 on: February 06, 2004, 12:13:23 AM »
Just saw this advertised after 6ft under.... Saturday 7th and Sunday 8th February 2004, at 9pm Channel 4  Angels in America It has Al Pachino in it.... (although he over does it rather alot these days)

Quote
Al Pacino, Meryl Streep and Emma Thompson star in the $65M HBO epic event.

In 1998, the National Theatre selected Angels in America - performed as two full-length plays - as one of the ten best plays of the century, and author Tony Kushner was awarded a Pulitzer Prize after its triumphant Broadway production.

Directed by Mike Nichols (The Graduate, Silkwood, Primary Colours), this two-part, five-time Golden Globe winning six-hour film explores the sexual, racial, religious, political and social issues of the Reagan era.

Angels in America also stars Mary-Louise Parker, Jeffrey Wright, Justin Kirk and Ben Shenkman, with featured performances from British actors Michael Gambon and Simon Callow.



And here is the IMBD entry for it.

edit to insert times.

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #20 on: February 06, 2004, 01:18:02 AM »
Damn, the shows have to exist? Typical.

War at Sea
8 Feb 7:00 pm
BBC 2

Another excuse for genuine programming, the BBC produces yet another War Documentary from entirely the same perspective as the four thousand that preceded it. Narrated by the unbearable Professor Andrew Lambert, I'd only advise watching this if you have a masochistic desire to hear the story of "how plucky Britain drove back the Hun" again, you've been living in a 10x10ft steel box since 1935 or you’re a rabid reader of Paul Dacre's finest John Bullshit.

animals on film
« Reply #21 on: February 06, 2004, 06:34:44 PM »
animal camera
wednesday the 11th?

i've seen an advert for this and am not entirely sure when it is, but it looks brilliant.  they have, with visible discomfort to the subjects, fitted cameras on to eagles, and tiny little cameras on to other insects.  it looks like another big, impressive, bbc nature programme, and finished with a super-slow-motion image of a bee leaving someone's hand (that isn't an animal camera bit, but looked good nonetheless).  there was clips on the ad of flying through a woodland scene, with flapping wings on each corner of the screen, presumably attached to an eagles face.  animal cruelty aside, this looks fantastic.  will perhaps edit if i find out when it's on.

Tokyo Sexwhale

  • When I get that feeling, I want Sexwhale healing
Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #22 on: February 07, 2004, 06:09:10 PM »
Terry Jones' Medieval Lives - BBC2 Monday 8pm.

For fans of "Monty Python and the Holy Grail" or his early-90s series "The Crusades."

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #23 on: February 08, 2004, 09:29:37 PM »
The Exorcist III
Channel 4, Monday, 11PM

I haven't seen this film for ages and I remember joining several fellow whores in singing it's praises in the 100 Scariest Movie Moment's thread a few months back.

Decapitations, sharp dialogue, a constant aura of menace and Brad Dourif acting as mad as a bucket of frogs. Hurrah! Can't wait.

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #24 on: February 08, 2004, 09:34:21 PM »
---------------

Blue Jam

  • Formula 1 jazz nutjob
Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #25 on: February 09, 2004, 09:27:14 PM »
BBC2, 10.35 PM, tonight (09/02): documentary on Peter Sellers, in which his family talk about him. It includes interviews with his son who wrote a dirt-dishing biography, so should be worth watching.

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #26 on: February 10, 2004, 12:32:12 PM »
Tuesday 10th (tonight)
Channel 4
11.05pm  Comedy Lab An insight into the thoughts, ideas and emotions that pass through comedian Demetri Martin's head in a single minute. His mental processes are exposed during a journey to an audition for which he's already late. Shot in New York, his inner experiences are illustrated using film, music, drawings and animation .

This guy's Perrier award winning show was on BBC4 last month and it was pretty good, so I'm  looking forward to this.

Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #27 on: February 10, 2004, 02:54:39 PM »
Quote from: "12 years, 11 months old"
Tuesday 10th (tonight)
Channel 4
11.05pm  Comedy Lab An insight into the thoughts, ideas and emotions that pass through comedian Demetri Martin's head in a single minute. His mental processes are exposed during a journey to an audition for which he's already late. Shot in New York, his inner experiences are illustrated using film, music, drawings and animation .

This guy's Perrier award winning show was on BBC4 last month and it was pretty good, so I'm  looking forward to this.


i was meaning to bring this up in comedy chat but i couldn't remember the guy's name. it's supposed to be very woody allen / seinfeld-esque, i plan to give it a watch

gazzyk1ns

  • "I don't give a shit if your dad's dead or anything else"
Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #28 on: February 11, 2004, 08:17:52 PM »
At a quarter past midnight tonight (well, tomorrow morning, you know what I mean...) is something called "Rock N Roll Myths", which is apparently what it sounds like. Might be good, dunno. After it is that "Rather Good Videos" programme, which does usually have a few rather good videos on. Apparently the presenter made that fucking shite advert for Switch with the pelicans/toucans, though, so ignore him.

imitationleather

  • "The French... are famous... for their kissing"
    • http://last.fm/user/ImiLeathr
Verbwhores' Radio Times
« Reply #29 on: February 11, 2004, 08:33:09 PM »
They only ever play about 20 seconds of each video though, and there's too much padding with those animations that stopped being funny about two years ago. Ah well, TiVo always tapes it for me...