Define Masculinity

[Johnny Yesno]

Owning a power drill.

[Godzilla Bankrolls]

Being able to fix something in the house that you didn't put there yourself.

But not calling your parents afterwards to tell them you fixed the front door lock all by yourself, without any help from the other three men you live with.

[Neville Chamberlain]

The ability to shag birds, drink beer, take the lid off a jar of Marmite without using a towel, AND put up a set of shelves all at the same time!!!

[GetTheeBehindMeStan]

The ability to shag birds, drink beer, take the lid off a jar of Marmite without using a towel, AND put up a set of shelves all at the same time!!!

Nope, sorry. Multi-tasking is so girlie.

[quadraspazzed]

[Neville Chamberlain]

The ability to shag birds, drink beer, take the lid off a jar of Marmite without using a towel, AND put up a set of shelves all at the same time!!!

Nope, sorry. Multi-tasking is so girlie.

Bah! You're right!

OK, how about: "The ability to shag birds, THEN drink beer, THEN take the lid off a jar of Marmite without using a towel, and THEN put up a set of shelves."

Is that more manly?

[Johnny Yesno]

The ability to shag birds, drink beer, take the lid off a jar of Marmite without using a towel, AND put up a set of shelves all at the same time!!!

Nope, sorry. Multi-tasking is so girlie.

Bah! You're right!

OK, how about: "The ability to shag birds, THEN drink beer, THEN take the lid off a jar of Marmite without using a towel, and THEN put up a set of shelves."

Is that more manly?

As long as you do all of those activities without reading the manual. And own a power drill.

[hencole]

Opening a jar with a knife and slicing of the tip of your finger and using a tea towel to stem the flow of blood.

[quadraspazzed]

[Sivead]

is he shaging his sister?

[quadraspazzed]

HE IS A REAL MAN!

[Catalogue Trousers]

So being a real man appears to be looking like you're taking a big painful shit while dressed in a posing-pouch.

[quadraspazzed]

While shagging your sister.

Exactly.

[Fielding]

Lifting an old pool table onto the back of a lorry with a load of other masculins, without using a tea towel.

Maybe too literal, but can someone post the ball of cocks please?

What I like to do is take a picture of my own little fella, fire-up photoshop, cut 'n' paste in to 'penises.jpg', then challenge friends and well-wishers to pick him out without using a tea towel.

[Catalogue Trousers]

MojoJojo - will this do you, old chap (huh huh, I said "old chap")?

[Johnny Yesno]

Bill Bailey's definition: Carry stuff. Don't get in the way.