Suggestions Thread

[Neil]

Well there's no doubt that this place is boring the living fuck out of me currently.  I only actually miss about 3 or 4 of the Greta Garbo's, but there's no doubt that losing a userbase it took 7 years to build up has had an effect on this board - which I always knew it would  as I saw it happen before in exactly the same way.  

GB has helped, as GD had become interminable (i.e. full of threads about stuff I'm not interested in personally, news/Dr Who/Jesus/football/puter games etc), but I'm still not satisfied and am willing to try more things.  Although, really, I think the only thing that can really be done is to sit and wait for decent new posters to sign up.

In general I also think things need a bit of a shake-up and people need to be inspired to do and say different stuff.  So, suggestions motherfuckers.

[Mr. Analytical]

Might I suggest a forum in which we roleplay our pets?

[chocky909]

What was it that interested you in the olden days that is lacking now exactly?

[surreal]

What was it that interested you in the olden days that is lacking now exactly?

Yeah, I know you complain about quality on the boards quite often Neil, but I'm not sure what it is you do want?  is there a forum that you wish this place was as good as?

Personally, I think since the Scouring of the Boards its been pretty good here again - people aren't scared to post (except in CC but that goes without saying) and there are a lot of new names (though hiding a lot of old faces I expect).   I think you underestimate people's opinions of the place - I read a LOT of the web and this is definitely a top 5 site for me.  Basically, are you building the site for you or for the community?

Maybe we need more forums - how about one for movies/TV/DVD, which would clear GD up a bit?

Also, any chance of doing anything about the constant timeouts on the servers?  I'm sure if you asked for donations to keep things running smoothly you'd get some...

Just my $0.02

[daisy11]

I was bored today and feeling ill due to tummy bug, but am very excited now as this will be my new job:

I5 finds women spies hard to lure
Reuters
By Mark Trevelyan, Security Correspondent Reuters - Sunday, May 13 11:43 am

LONDON (Reuters) - Security service MI5 is keen to bring more women on board as it launches a new recruitment campaign this week -- the latest stage in a drive to double its size.
(Advertisement)

The domestic spy agency, around 1,800 strong at the time of the September 11 attacks on the United States in 2001, has swelled its ranks to more than 3,000 and expects to reach 3,500 by the end of next year.

But despite being able to point to two recent female leaders, it is struggling to attract women recruits. While women make up around 47 percent of all employees, they account for only 38 percent of new applicants.

"We need to get that increased so we're not going to have a problem further down the line," said a security source. "We have to reflect the diversity of the UK to do our job properly."

The nature of surveillance work, for example, requires a healthy balance between male and female operatives to keep track of suspects without attracting attention.

In an unusual initiative, MI5 last year placed ads in the female changing rooms of health clubs in a bid to find women surveillance officers -- a physically demanding role involving shadowing suspects for hours at a time by foot or in a vehicle.

This week's campaign will include ads on London buses and underground trains as MI5 seeks to fill a range of jobs from caterers to drivers, intelligence officers, linguists, surveillance officers and technology experts.

Applicants face screening by a recruitment agency to weed out dreamers and no-hopers. Then they must pass an initial assessment centre, an interview with an MI5 recruiter, a day-long barrage of tests at agency headquarters and a final selection board. In parallel with the final stages, they are subjected to six to eight months of security vetting.

Reflecting the shift in focus from Northern Irish guerrilla groups to Islamist militants, MI5 also recruits increasingly from Britain's ethnic minorities, who make up some eight percent of all staff.

It is especially interested in fluent or native speakers of languages like Arabic and Urdu.

While its staff numbers have expanded, the agency says the threats it faces have sharply increased too.

Its then head, Eliza Manningham-Buller, said last November that her officers and the police were dealing with some 200 groupings or networks and some 1,600 identified people "actively engaged in plotting or facilitating terrorist acts here and overseas".

[actwithoutwords]

Also, any chance of doing anything about the constant timeouts on the servers?  I'm sure if you asked for donations to keep things running smoothly you'd get some...

Just my $0.02

2 fucking cents isn't going to stop too many server time-outs. Particularly given the  current exchange rate.

[Al Tha Funkee Homosapien]

No no, more forums is not the way to go. It's just makes things even more separate and cliquey.

[Saygone]

You could try joint writing efforts.  Instead of the constant bitching about shite, propose an idea for a script or something, and ask for contributions.  But put time limits on them or something.  And votes or something to choose the best lines or scenes. I don't know I'm drunk.

[Neil]

What was it that interested you in the olden days that is lacking now exactly?

Good question, I'm flicking through the old GD archives now to see how things were.  Ironically, at that point I wasn't too into GD, whereas now I'm bored of CC and the people who go on about the fucking Goodies, Boosh and Josie Long etc all the time.  And it's an art-form I don't spend much time watching/listening to, so I suppose it's only natural I'd get bored of talking about it.  Maybe I've just grown out of the site and forums in general, as I also find Chris Morris to be bollocks now, and that crosses over with the lack of time I spend on comedy, which makes the site and forums just another chore like washing the dishes.  If I had any sense, I'd delete the whole thing and go and play my guitar or something.  

Personally, I think since the Scouring of the Boards its been pretty good here again - people aren't scared to post (except in CC but that goes without saying) and there are a lot of new names (though hiding a lot of old faces I expect). I think you underestimate people's opinions of the place - I read a LOT of the web and this is definitely a top 5 site for me. Basically, are you building the site for you or for the community?

Well I feel like a real dick building it for "the community" now, given recent events.  There are ex-members of the so-called "community" I've known for a decade who won't even speak to me.  Ultimately I do continue with it as I feel I owe it to people, but really, I'm getting fuck all out of it.  This is getting off track though - me saying 'well, I don't like it, but they do, so fair enough' is leading to me just basically ignoring huge swathes of the forums because I don't give a tuppeny toss about Dr Who or Jesus or whatever.

Also, GB is now starting to get its first 'always on page one threads' like that 'post pics of yourself' one, and that always leads to a massive sense of ennui for me.  

I'm not convinced the current set-up is right - I've thought about essentially just stating again and banging everything into one or two sub-forums so that people end up reading and contributing to threads they wouldn't normally see.  Or combining the music forum with GD as it's basically all just media discussions now.

[Emma Raducanu]

I think we should have a film thread.

[chocky909]

I think until the search function is fixed, the more forums the better. Is a fix likely?

[clareQuilty]

If you're not feeling it, why not just let it go? It's not like you make any money out of this place and you need it to keep food on the table.

I used to really liked professional wrestling when I was younger but it would bore the fuck out of me having to run a whole forum/website devoted to Hulk Hogan.

Is there anyway you could abdicate your position to someone else and just post the threads you want to read, concentrate on the music discussion etc.?

The thing is that there's only a finite number of discussions that are really possible and people are by their nature going to return to the ones that they're familiar with. With any forum there's going to be the sense for long time posters that they've seen it all before whereas a lot of the people posting nowadays are young scamps who weren't into the whole Chris Morris thing 10 years back or so.

You don't owe anyone anything- jaysus, the amount of stuff i've got for free from this place and i've never even see a hint of having a paypal donation box! It's commendable but it's very very rare.

There are so many networking sites and great places like last.fm where people could set up forums and whatnot if this place wasn't here. You shouldn't feel compelled to keep going just because people are used to this place.

[A Passing Turk Slipper]

I think if it's just a chore for you and you're not getting anything from it you shouldn't be scared to just say fuck it and close it for a while, be it a month or a year or if you prefer your life without it forever. It has been different here recently and I'm not exactly sure why or what's changed other than the few posters that went away after the big clique war of 07. Not sure what to say really, I don't think there's any specific thing that can be done to bring the board back to the 'glory years'.

[The Plaque Goblin]

...And it's an art-form I don't spend much time watching/listening to, so I suppose it's only natural I'd get bored of talking about it.  Maybe I've just grown out of the site and forums in general, as I also find Chris Morris to be bollocks now, and that crosses over with the lack of time I spend on comedy, which makes the site and forums just another chore like washing the dishes.  If I had any sense, I'd delete the whole thing and go and play my guitar or something...

If there is a very particular subject you're interested in now why not just create a new forum for it and see what happens?

Perhaps it is just time to change the theme of the website completely too.

[Funcrusher]

I think we should have a film thread.

I'd probably post on a films sub-forum if there was one, as long as it wasn't all sci-fi movies and comedy. At the mo' there just tend to be one or two film threads mixed in with general discussions, which just tend to get lost. Not sure if that's the kind of suggestion you're after.

[Funcrusher]

...And it's an art-form I don't spend much time watching/listening to, so I suppose it's only natural I'd get bored of talking about it.  Maybe I've just grown out of the site and forums in general, as I also find Chris Morris to be bollocks now, and that crosses over with the lack of time I spend on comedy, which makes the site and forums just another chore like washing the dishes.  If I had any sense, I'd delete the whole thing and go and play my guitar or something...

If there is a very particular subject you're interested in now why not just create a new forum for it and see what happens?

Perhaps it is just time to change the theme of the website completely too.

I wonder if I'm alone in being someone who posts on here a bit who isn't really that interested in either Chris Morris or comedy in general. I'd heard from someone who posted here that it was a good general discussion and music type forum, so signed up for that. I'd agree with other comments that the standard of discussion here compares pretty well with other forums I waste time at work on.

[chocky909]

Agreed. This is largely twat free zone compared to many other forums. The community polices itself and it would be missed, massively.

[Sam]

Why doesn't someone just create a forum that stands alone and isn't related to this site or any other, call it "Verbwhores" and put a message on the site directing everyone to it. Then after a while shut the site down.

The only problem I can see is that it would become too cliquey. Having the forum attached to the main site means plenty of new people will sign up to the forums, whereas a forum on its own wouldn't attract any new members, except by word of mouth.

But seriously, Neil, don't carry on if your heart's not in it. You're under no obligation and you can do whatever you want, after all its your site. It would be a massive shame to see it go as this place has given me countless hours of joy and boredom relief and there are some genuinley fantastic people on the forums, not to mention all the great comedy, music, films and other media I stumble across that I wouldn't otherwise have found out about.

It's up to you. Go with what you think is best and I'm sure most people on here will support you.

[All Surrogate]

Is there something wrong, Neil?  I mean, something other than the board?

[Neil]

Why doesn't someone just create a forum that stands alone and isn't related to this site or any other, call it "Verbwhores" and put a message on the site directing everyone to it. Then after a while shut the site down.

But that's already happened, people have already taken what I've created and then erased me from it.  That's part of why I resent it now.  What a waste of time and energy!

Is there something wrong, Neil? I mean, something other than the board?

Yes.

If there is a very particular subject you're interested in now why not just create a new forum for it and see what happens?

There already is a music forum, but it's not very good.  The only part of the forums I like now is posting stuff in SDJ.  But I'd like to try and bring some fun back to GB so I can check in while I'm listening to stuff.  I don't watch TV as I listen to so much music, so I rely on this place to give me something to read at the same time.  

Ah, fuck. Sorry.

[chocky909]

I recommend a hot bath, a big glass of milk and an early night. Always makes me feel better.

You were all pumped up and enthusiastic about redesigns a few days ago too...

Run the bath now, go on.

[All Surrogate]

Is there something wrong, Neil? I mean, something other than the board?

Yes.

Ah, time to crack out ELIZA; go go gadget telepsychotherapy!

[Artemis]

Is there something wrong, Neil?  I mean, something other than the board?

That was among my first thoughts, too.

I hear your criticisms about the board, Neil, and many of them I agree with, however I don't want to have to consider whether or not you'd personally be interested in a subject before I post  a thread on it. The idea of GB was a good one, and it started off really well, but it was inevitable that after a while, the notion of having a place to post more human and personal subjects would descend into a series of bland, uncreative and uninspiring topics, several of which would find themselves near the top all the time.

Blaming the congregation is a bit off-colour. You have a forum here with a large (ish) and active userbase, who are relatively diverse and capable of discussion on a wide range of topics without things always degenerating into flame wars. That's more then a lot of forums will ever get. I don't think the answer is to openly lament the lack of decent posters, which I'm sure I'm not alone in finding a bit insulting, but instead to be a little more pro-active in your moderation. To have sub-forums which you've specifically designed with a genre of threads in mind, then allowing any old crap to be posted, then blaming your lack of moderation on the state of your users is a bit much, in my opinion.

Perhaps the way forward would be to agree on something a bit more descriptive then 'chat and creativity' as a tagline to the forum; something that makes it clearer what each sub-forum is about, then become more pro-active in the deletion of thread like "How Do You Spell Your Name?" etc. Such moderation needn't be tyrannical and overbearing, just the simple deletion of obviously dull threads with perhaps a follow up PM to the author. The inclusion of a better explanation for each forum would limit the number of these threads and after a while, it'll just settle down to a forum perhaps slightly less active (in terms of numbers of new threads) but of a higher quality.

[clareQuilty]

Is there something wrong, Neil? I mean, something other than the board?

Yes.

Ah, time to crack out ELIZA; go go gadget telepsychotherapy!

She's shit. I told her I felt like a pair of curtains and she completely missed the point.

[Funcrusher]

Is there something wrong, Neil? I mean, something other than the board?

Yes.

You do sound a bit down - my sympathies for whatever ails you at the moment.

[Small Man Big Horse]

Ah, time to crack out ELIZA; go go gadget telepsychotherapy!

I told her about how my Mum's depressed at the moment and having suicidal thoughts. She then asked "Do you wish she did do it?" and when I replied "No", she came back with "You are being a bit negative".

I won't be using the site to seek further advice.

[Eight Taiwanese Teenagers]

This site is still brilliant and if you need someone to help you with it I'm sure a hundred internet hands will be up in the air.

[clareQuilty]

Aye, it is a great site. Also, who needs those prima donna cunts anyhow? Long live the new flesh!!!

[rudi]

I told her about how my Mum's depressed at the moment and having suicidal thoughts. She then asked "Do you wish she did do it?" and when I replied "No", she came back with "You are being a bit negative".

Ha ha! Fabulous.

[Neil]

To have sub-forums which you've specifically designed with a genre of threads in mind, then allowing any old crap to be posted, then blaming your lack of moderation on the state of your users is a bit much, in my opinion.

It's fine for you to blame me though?  

I think you've put rather a lot of words into my mouth there.  You're responding to things I never actually said.  

Perhaps the way forward would be to agree on something a bit more descriptive then 'chat and creativity' as a tagline to the forum; something that makes it clearer what each sub-forum is about, then become more pro-active in the deletion of thread like "How Do You Spell Your Name?" etc. Such moderation needn't be tyrannical and overbearing, just the simple deletion of obviously dull threads with perhaps a follow up PM to the author. The inclusion of a better explanation for each forum would limit the number of these threads and after a while, it'll just settle down to a forum perhaps slightly less active (in terms of numbers of new threads) but of a higher quality.

Have you any idea how much shit I'd have to take from people?  Look at how offended you are at just the suggestion that things could be better than they currently are!

I was looking for suggestions that would make the forums better.  There shouldn't be "obviously dull threads", they should be interesting regardless of the subject.  So far the photoshops haven't really come back as I'd hoped, it'd be nice if they were mixed with discussion threads for instance.  I'm part of the problem as I should be putting the effort into thinking up and keeping alive some decent threads, but I've been knocking my pan in on the redesign - partly as when that's done I can then let the user-base keep the site up-to-date, and I can perhaps get on with something I'm actually interested in.