EastEnders

[Dead kate moss]

Poor Jack must have had a bump to the head. He seems to be under the delusion that Sharon is the sexiest woman in the universe rather than a strange looking wide headed acre of blondeness that overacts all over the shop. He doesn't seem alone, others are finding Shaz irresistable, just as Kat Slater can improbably have her pick of the men in Walford. Yet nobody acts like Lauren is the stunner she is. Perhaps I've said too much. Mmm Lauren.

[Johnny Townmouse]

The notion that Jack would even give that fucking hippo a second look is laughable.

She looks like someone has permanently photoshopped her head.

[MuteBanana]

Yet nobody acts like Lauren is the stunner she is. Perhaps I've said too much. Mmm Lauren.

The show seems to think no lad would go near a binge drinking Lauren despite her probably being like many girls her age. The other week she organised a day time drinking session and at the end everyone left, even Fatbot, despite Lauren giving him signals she wanted to have some fun.

[MuteBanana]

Being a big Eastenders fan I have an account where I upload my favourite clips.

Here it is - http://www.dailymotion.com/user/mut3banana/1

And for recent Eastenders viewers, here's one of my favourite moments of the past couple of years.

Michael Moon and Eddie Moon.
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xod28n_juscuzyougotabitagreyinyerhair_videogames

[Smeraldina Rima]

Just for a bit of fun in the Eastenders watching corner of Albert Square of CaB, who's Kat Slater having an affair with? I haven't been able to work it out because they're all going out for walks and checking their phones at the same time.

Part of me suspects it will be one of the people who haven't been filmed collecting their milk and brooding, etc. So maybe Fatbot or Tyler, a woman, a returning or new character or the corpse of wellard.

I've only just noticed that Kim calls Janine Janice. Nice touch.

[Dead kate moss]

We don't know, and it's quite annoying. As is Alfie Moon behaving like that Armstrong & Miller character who keeps being talked out of the obvious evidence his wife is knobbing someone else.

BTW

https://www.google.co.uk/search?num=10&hl=en&safe=off&site=imghp&tbm=isch&source=hp&biw=1004&bih=576&q=terrahawks&oq=terraha&gs_l=img.1.0.0l10.3535.5703.0.7337.7.5.0.0.0.0.798.2455.0j2j5-1j2.5.0...0.0...1ac.1.csIbmaRN_Wc

[Smeraldina Rima]

Oh, I know we don't know. I meant who do you think it is? I value your guess, Dead Kate Moss.

[Dead kate moss]

Thank you. I don't know though, either it's the obvious suspects and that's lame, or as you say a real surprise and they have given out no clues. The TV mags don't know because I check their covers when I go to sainsburys. All is revealed next week apparently. I'll guess at Max.

[buttgammon]

They're just throwing us red herrings and like Heather's baby, it's going to turn out to be someone most people didn't suspect. My money's on Fatboy.

[Rev]

Christ, it's such a dull plot line.  And it's probably Max since whatsername that plays Tanya's leaving for a bit, but who fucking cares?  Affairs are always shit in Eastenders, let's have a nice murder or explosion or something.

[Smeraldina Rima]

There's noone quite like Shane Richie in a traumatic scene. They had a manslaughter and an explosion recently so it was time for an affair. They should have a pox on the square, a plague reducing all sinners to crawling around and shedding skin, losing power of speech and dream. Ricky Butcher returns and sings we've got a good thing going in the allotment.

There's a lot of people leaving the soap these days. I had no idea Anthony was going so his gambling episode floored me. I haven't considered Masood for the Kat Slater affair, or his brother with the eclectic ipod. Outside bet.

[MuteBanana]

Lou Beale doles out some advice to her family before she goes off to bed to die.

Astonishing stuff and Anna Wing is her usual fearsome self.

One of the, if not THE, greatest exits in the shows history.

Just remember Lou did this with the knowledge she'd be dead by the morning.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ULQXR5ZI0s

[Dead kate moss]

1. Alfie is such a fucking doormat. Not even dfemending to know the name of the guy(s) Kat's been knobbing, so at least he can stop suspecting everyone else? Who wouldn't demand to know the name, even if you had no plans on doing anything, you'd need to know in case they got together again. Unbelievable and makes Alfie such a pathetic character now. Him and Kat were likable, now they are ruined. Ruined!

2. Nearly complained to the BBC about how they are depicting this social worker as a heartless baby-snatcher. Social workers get enough shitty unfair press (and are far more likely to die in the course of their job than the police btw) and the BBC are telling many impressionable viewers, young mums maybe, that make a simple mistake or leave the washing up not done and the social services will whisk your baby away. Totally badly written too.

3. Sharon continues to be written as 'The Wesley' with everyone having immense respect for her, laughing at her jokes, always a font of wisdom etc... that will probably turn the audience against her the more they overdo it (as in Trope-Namer Wesley off SNG, if I haven't got my tropes mixed up)

[Smeraldina Rima]

Alfie Moon was listening to Jeff Buckley's Forget Her on friday's episode. He always struck me as more of an I'm Your Man by Shane Richie sort of guy.

[Johnny Townmouse]

Oh Max you silly plonker cunt.

[MuteBanana]

There were some cracking theories on what Derek and Max got up to while they were away.

Max accidentally killing someone and helping to support the widow and kids. Max and Derek getting involved in exposing illegal immigrants. Max and Derek being pimps.

Nah, Max and another woman. That's the story the people can't get enough of.

Derek's last rant was stunning.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oe6zwssOZtI
NO MAN!

Max and Jack are an underrated brother team. Always do better in scenes together, bit of bad blood, but at the end of the day they'll fight each others corner.

[Rev]

I'm not taking the piss here, tonight's episode was one of the best-written pieces of television I've seen in ages.  With the exception of the final doof doof bit, which seemed to be there just because there had to be a dramatic line to shuffle into that position.

Nina Wadia leaving seems to have been unexpected, and this whole thing rather hastily assembled, and as contrived as it was the boxing up of stuff completely worked.  This is how people generally split up; no fireworks, no violence, and with residual love.