I want questions! (I'm appearing on Questiontime)

[Murdo]

You'll never top my appearance.

What happened then?

[lazyhour]

Oh, nothing special.  I just made absolutely everybody reassess everything they thought they knew by making a searingly insightful comment about our culture's treatment of art.

There is a screengrab somewhere of me with very short hair and a clever jacket making my amazing point.  And a photoshopped version someone did where I have bigger ears and redder eyes.

This all happened years ago, of course, and I've shrunken into an insignificant VW since then.

[Paaaaul]

Wear pink string around your head, so you can see yourself on telly,i did.

[lazyhour]

You only went on it to copy me.

And how many amazing points did you make about art, Paaaaul?  And what was your onscreen "facetime"?

And were you sitting proudly next to your parents?  No, I didn't think so.

[Artemis]

You needed to make it tighter around your neck and suspend yourself from a lighting rig instead of just sitting there.

You're never going to get the job done this way, you fucking amateur.

My apologies if I've read this completely wrongly and you're actually involved in some kind of covert S&M relationship with the guy in the back row, who has you by a leash.

[Evil Knevil]

I've got to leave in 15 minutes and I've still no idea what my second question's going to be... Help!

[Dusty Gozongas]

I've got to leave in 15 minutes and I've still no idea what my second question's going to be... Help!

"Do you ever envision the Labour party becoming a broad church again?"

Oh..too late...

[Paaaaul]

You only went on it to copy me.

And how many amazing points did you make about art, Paaaaul?  And what was your onscreen "facetime"?

And were you sitting proudly next to your parents?  No, I didn't think so.

I hate art, and my parents, and you.

[Evil Knevil]

3rd row, far right. Despite having my handed raised the entire time, nobody paid attention to me. I almost nodded off in the middle of the show when they were banging on about Iraq.

[Blumf]

You see the problem was you didn't shout out "Sir! Sir!" whilst you hand was up. And why did that woman who looks like a younger version of the baddie from the Apprentice (Katie?) get to ask two questions?

Anyway, quite enjoyed that, although it didn't really leave me with any particular favorite.

[Evil Knevil]

Katie-a-like got selected before the show to ask her questions (it's all worked out in advance).
I should also note that I volunteered to test the mikes at the desk and got to fart repeatedly in Peter Hain's seat. I hope some of the eggy aroma stayed behind and infected that oily cunt. When we were sitting at the desk, the audience asked us a few sample questions, and I managed to call them all 'criminal scum' for opposing speed cameras.

Harriet Harman was surprisingly nice, and actually said hello to me twice, once before the show, while they were waiting in the wings, and afterwards outside. My friend and I were walking past and he said 'oh look, there's Harriet Harman', which she heard, and promptly smiled and wished us a good night...
...

[Mr. Analytical]

oh look, there's Harriet Harman', which she heard, and promptly smiled and wished us a good night...
...

  she didn't say it suggestively did she?