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Memorable Snippets of Conversation

Started by Small Man Big Horse, June 15, 2007, 09:35:31 PM

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Small Man Big Horse

A few years ago I was temping at Esure, doing filing with about 10 other people. It was a surprisingly good mix despite a pretty big age gap between some of us, and despite the tedium of the work it wasn't too bad a job because of that. One morning a girl called Amanda (hippyish but fun) was about an hour late, and when she eventually arrived she apologised but admitted it was due to the fact that she'd been out till five in the morning after being invited to a party by a group of strangers. She was a bit ashamed, and promised to our boss that it wouldn't happen again.

An older guy (50ish, smart, but often quiet) suddenly piped up with "Enjoy it while you can lass. It doesn't last" in the most melancholic way I've ever heard anyone say anything. And as I've got older and realised the truth in that, it's stuck with me ever since.

So does anyone else have bits of conversations that they've never forgotten?

buttgammon

I have loads of little bits of conversations floating around in my head which randomly appear from time to time.

A completely bonkers girl who has been in a few of my classes a couple of years ago:
"What does fiscal mean?"
Me: "Financial. It's to do with money and finance."
I didn't even get a bloody reply!

And the same girl again, when introduced to 'Earth (Gaia)' by The Orb on my iPod: "Oh. Ambient house. I doubt I'll like this, then."

A lad in my class when I was about 10.
"Sorry I'm late, miss. I got up late because me dad came home at about 4 in the morning all drunk and he hit me mam, so he kept us up late." Really harrowing, and probably one for the 'Bleakest Snippet of Conversation You've Ever Overheard' thread more than this one.

Artemis

God yeah, I've got loads of these. Usually one liners rather then conversations though.

Starting a job for a bank years ago, I was getting to know my fellow new starters and one of them was fifty something and when we were discussing money and how it probably won't make you happy in the long term, he said "if you can't be happy, be miserable in comfort". It was really quite a sad insight into a life that had obviously gone wrong somewhere down the line.

In another life, I was sat with my fiancé on a couch and she was suffering the affects of too much methamphetamines (which is neither pretty nor funny, as anyone who's witnessed it will know). She had managed to convince herself, in her warped state, that I was in fact Jesus. She started spouting some really crazy shit and I locked eye contact with her and said "You're not making sense right now". Somehow I struck the perfect balance of compassion, sincerity, worry, concern and love. My delivery shocked her out of it and it was one of 'those' moments.

mister_enmity

The most memorable snippets for me usually tend to be insults.

One time, when I was in year 8, I had crooked teeth and a boy in my class recently got braces and showed them off to the class. A particular cunt in the class told me not to steal them. Regardless of the supreme snideness in the insult, looking back at it, its actually kind of funny.

I was in Somerfield and there was an argument going on with a customer and a shop assistant about the amount of change he was supposed to recieve. He was pretty aggressive and he kept pointing at his reciept to say that he was owed a lot more than he was paid. He then asked the assistant whether he had his eyes up his arse.

Borboski

Quote from: Small Man Big Horse on June 15, 2007, 09:35:31 PM
An older guy (50ish, smart, but often quiet) suddenly piped up with "Enjoy it while you can lass. It doesn't last" in the most melancholic way I've ever heard anyone say anything. And as I've got older and realised the truth in that, it's stuck with me ever since.

So does anyone else have bits of conversations that they've never forgotten?

He's right, though, eh?

Borboski

I always remember a tiny chap weedy irish chap, weeping in the checking in desk in Nottingham police station, being left to rail against himself while we watched, wailing, while we watched and waited, him completely pissed wailing "THERE'S A BODY IN DUNBERRY WOODS NEAR *******, WE TOOK HIM OUT AND WE SHOT HIM, HE SAID HE WAS SORRY AND WE DRAGGED HIM AND WE DRAGGED HIM AND WE DRAGGED HIM AND WE PUT HIM AGAINST A TREE AND AND HE SAID HE WAS SORRY AND WE SHOT HIM AND HE'S BURIED IN DUNBERRY WOODS."

Small Man Big Horse

Quote from: Borboski on June 15, 2007, 11:47:39 PM
He's right, though, eh?

Sadly for me has been. Everyone I know is either engaged or married, most have kids, and a night out has to end by 11pm as the babysitters need to be driven home. It really shouldn't be like this at 32.

Borboski

AND THEN HE SCREAMED AND SCREAMED AS WE PULLED HIM INTO THE WOODS AND KICKED HIS FACE IN UNTIL HE WAS BARELY BREATHING AND THEN WE SHOT HIM.

Evil Knevil

 Ah, I remember you worked at a desk for the filth... How'd you get into that kind of work? I'm interested to do similar myself.

rudi

THEN HE WET HIMSELF AND I HAD TO CHOP HIM UP THEN VINNIE JONES TURNED UP AND I WAS IN A GUY RITCHIE FILLUM...

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote"Oh. Ambient house. I doubt I'll like this, then."

What a downright sloppy deduction.

buttgammon

Well, it was coming from an especially small-minded "I only listen to metal and nothing else. If the band have ever worn anything other than black then I think they make silly bubblegum pop music for 6 year olds" type.