Spontaneous stupidity

[biniput]

Ever suddenly lept into a train of thought that ended very quickly in a raft of humourous suggestions.  Eg sometime a few weeks ago while painting my grandmothers front room.

brother:  There's a lot of pictures.

me:  There's almost thousands.

Dad:  Do you think we shout put a picture nail in the middle of the tv screen.

Me and brother: yes that'll work

Dad:  That will make it HD ready.

Me and brother laugh for a minute after that last remark.

Today while watching wimbledon.

Me:  Not this again. After every shot there will be endless clapping.

Brother:  They'll clap untill they have no skin left.

Me:  Yeah, they'll clap until all the bones in thier hands are smashed.

(a little later and someone mentions Parkinson)

Dad: He's packing up now.

Me:  His body packed in years ago anyway.

Brother:  He's just a hologram. Like on that holodeck bits of him go missing.

Me: Yeah like on star treck a part of him will fuzz up or go to leave some wire grid.  His arm keeps twitching with interfearence.

Brother:  He ends up streaked half way accross the studio. (makes me laugh now).

Me: He ends up black and white for 5 minutes, swearing about the technical problems.

The average timespan of these conversations is around 10 seconds and the speed makes it funnier as it comes so fast and may not read well but that should not matter. So anything else that comes into this regardless of how long or short the conversation will do.  Grandma's and mum's aren't the only ones who talk cack sometimes you know.  I find it good to keep a record of humourous thoughts anyway.

[biniput]

Surely someone has something to say.  A thread on wearing rubber gloves has got 28 replys all fucking ready.

[Small Man Big Horse]

The only one I can remember off hand that's happened recently when how a group of us were in the pub, and a drunken friend was rambling about how one time she'd accidentally mixed up her husband with her cat.

Her: Well I was expecting Paul to come downstairs, so when I saw Sid (the cat) I just didn't think and started talking to him as if he was Paul.

Me: That's just odd. You mistook an animal for a person.

Her: Yeah.

Me: I've got to say that I've never done that. Well, apart from that one time I went ballroom dancing with Pixie and Trixie*.

Her: They sure did know how to dance.

Me: It was the jealousy I couldn't cope with, fighting over who'd dance with me first.

Her: Was that why Pixie scratched Trixie's eyes out?

Me: Yeah...She never got over me winning the first prize with Trixie in the Surrey Championships...


But that is about the only one I've had in the last couple of years. I used to have them a lot, especially with one friend who alas I don't see very often anymore. Nowadays most of my friends have children and mortgages and expensive cars and prefer to talk about property prices and moan about how they just never have any time to do anything fun anymore. Damn them.

* Cats, and my Mum named them.

[pk1yen]

None of my friends ever carry these things on. Attempts to start some Derek-and-Clive-style stream-of-consciousness spontaneity-with-inappropriate-hyphenation are met with either confused looks (pity), or I'm just ignored.
I lack genius, I now see. And sound like a tool.

"Friends", indeed.

[evelyn_blake]

  I often engage in this sort of thing, especially on MSN. The other night one particular train of thought led to me and the girl I was conversing with planning a grotesque wedding we were to have. The next day (yesterday) I dutifully knocked up a facebook event thing to declare this so I thought I'd link it here:

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.ListAll&friendID=66319910

I stuck it up on my myspace blog given facebooks more restrictive. I wrote it embellishing round select tangents of our nonsense chatter so it's more a representation of the spontaneous stupidity really.

...and yes, that is how I conduct all my flirtation- both on the net and in person. I woulden't recommend it as a technique.

[Al Tha Funkee Homosapien]

I also have a cat called Sid.

My bezzie mate and I often carry on these nonsense sort of conversations much to the bemusement of everyone around us. I don't think they're funny to anyone else though.

[Oscar]

Stupid conversations find me, which is good because I like them.
However, the other day I got into an odd exchange of ideas with my osteopath about a direct descendant of Moses running Sainsbury's and being linked to terrorist factions. It was entertaining, but somehow all wrong to be lying on a table half-naked while a complete stranger fondles you and snaps your bones about, all the while suppressing his giggles because he's just come up with a mental image of Moses parting the frozen meat section.
Some situations need brevity.

[pk1yen]

These sort of conversations are good for picking up girls. Assuming you tread the like between "funny" and "mental" carefully enough. If you get a good one, you have plenty of future references, which quickly develop into private jokes, and from then, into whatever you make them.

That's right, I know what the ladies like.

[buttgammon]

I do love having these kind of conversations but there are only certain people I find I can have them with. They leave some of my friends cold.

And they are great for picking up girls. Generally, I like anyone who you can sustain a weird linear conversation about random topics with so I'll get along very well with any girl who likes them as much as I do. Although they can sometimes make me get very excited and go over the top so I can come across as a complete weirdo if it goes wrong so I do think there is a fine line between 'funny' and 'mental' as pk1yn said.

[evelyn_blake]

These sort of conversations are good for picking up girls. Assuming you tread the like between "funny" and "mental" carefully enough. If you get a good one, you have plenty of future references, which quickly develop into private jokes, and from then, into whatever you make them.

That's right, I know what the ladies like.

Really? Well I assume I must be dangled precariously over towards the mental side.