UFOs over Stratford Upon Avon

[surreal]

Just spotted this story and wondered if we have any 'whores living round there that might have seen this?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=470579&in_page_id=1770

UFO sightings bring town to a standstill
Last updated at 09:12am on 26th July 2007

A crowd of 100 stunned stargazers brought a town centre to a standstill when five mysterious UFOs were spotted hovering in the sky.

Drinkers spilled out of pubs, motorists stopped to gawp and camera phones were aimed upwards as the five orbs, in a seeming formation, hovered above Stratford-Upon-Avon for half an hour.  The unidentified flying objects lit up the otherwise clear night sky above Shakespeare's birthplace in Warwickshire on Saturday.

Although Air Traffic Control reported no unusual activity, some witnesses were convinced they were witnessing an extra-terrestrial spectacle.

The strange episode started just after 10.30pm, when the lights were seen hovering slowly over the town before three of them formed a triangular shape with one positioned just to the right.

A few minutes later a fifth came into view travelling towards the others at breakneck speed before slowing down and stopping a short distance away.  Sceptics dismissed the UFOs as nothing more than hot air balloons, fireworks or even lanterns which had broken loose from a local rugby club.

Others, however, claimed the speed and agility of the objects was unlike any known aircraft and said the odd movement, lack of noise and the length of time in the air discounted any man-made explanation.

Edit:  Nice to see not even a UFO story is immune from typical Daily Mail comments

Lets hope they are coming to sort this corrupt world out. Or are they coming for the next election, should win hands down.
Or are they migrants from the planet zog after housing and the generous benefits we give, they must have heard about it.

- Jeffrey Orme, Swadlincote, Derbyshire

[wherearethespoons]

Send those bastards back. They come over 'ere...

[hencole]

Chinese lanterns.

[petula dusty]

Fuck it.

[surreal]

so none of you from Stratford?  No-one carving mountains into their mashed potato or anything?

[ziggy starbucks]

I wonder what an alien anal probe actually feels like. I hope they're gentle.

[Al Tha Funkee Homosapien]

I think if they can travel across the vastness of space to our little planet then they have probably invented a lube as good as if not better than KY jelly. I hope they call the next day and don't just ignore me and move onto someone else. I hate one night anal probings. They make me feel so cheap. I want a long term anal probe these days. Someone who will look into my eyes and stroke my face whilst inserting a greased inspection probe into my puckered and brutalised anus.

[mothman]

That's it, Al, let the healing begin. It's OK to cry. . .

[Al Tha Funkee Homosapien]

I'm always crying...inside

[George Oscar Bluth II]

I question the effectiveness of anal probing as a way of finding out about the human race.

[Al Tha Funkee Homosapien]

Don't knock it until you've tried it. And by 'tried it' I mean forceably unleashed upon you whilst being pinned down by large beings.

[Mr. Analytical]

I question the effectiveness of anal probing as a way of finding out about the human race.

  Who says they want to find out about the human race?

  Maybe there's a message scrawled on an interstellar motorway services toilet wall that we're the sweetest probees this side of Andromeda.

[katzenjammer]

It's just their method of communicating, varying angles, pressure and thrust are used to form different words and phrases.

[Clone Army]

Stratford Upon Avon happens to be an anagram of "Prod vat of torn anus", coincidence? I think not!

[SetToStun]

Stratford Upon Avon happens to be an anagram of "Prod vat of torn anus", coincidence? I think not!

Genius :-D

[duckorange]

It was marsh gas combined with the full moon in Uranus. There is no space ship

[Borboski]

I don't know what I think of the Penn & Teller Bullshit show - it's quite gratifying venting of rage - but then they do one on smoking, or even one they did on survivalists where their own absence of any proper data or thought out arguments become apparent.

BUT!  There is a great one on alien abduction where they end this middle aged bonkers lady a massive dildo, and she says, "Oh yes, this is what very much like what they used on me!".

[Borboski]

"Moon"?

"Uranus"?

You saucey sod!

[ziggy starbucks]

maybe all those signals and radiowaves we've been sending out from earth across the galaxy have been horribley misinterpreted. We've been saying "we are humans we mean you no harm" but those messages have been translated by the aliens as "come to earth and investigate our cute bottoms, we love it".

or maybe its like the ancient greeks. They would only accept testimony from a slave in a trial after the slave had been tortured, to make sure the slave wasn't lying to save his master's arse. Maybe the aliens only accept evidence from humans when there is something up our bottoms. It works on the principle that if a human hasn't got a probe up his arse, then he isn't to be trusted.

or maybe the 'probe' isn't a probe at all, but infact is an alien penis. I like that explanation best.

[Al Tha Funkee Homosapien]

When all those radio waves are converted into signals that are sent down fibre optics (well copper wiring in this country) through the internet into streaming media hubs in every house they're gonna be really pissed off that the favourite shows have stopped. Like in that episode of Futurama.

"Single Female Lawyer
Fighting for her clients
Wearing sexy mini skirts
And being self-reliant

...Single Female Lawyer
Having lots of sex... "

[buttgammon]

A very similar story was on the front page of my local paper today as well. I suspect there's a reasonable explanation but I can't be bothered thinking about it because it's just a case of silly season coming upon us once again and the papers publishing any old rubbish.

[Utter Shit]

Blatantly the Jews are up to something.

[FanOfKylie]

Stratford Herald reveals today that UFO's were actually illuminated Wedding Balloons. Thought it unlikely that Intelligence from Outer Space would head straight for Stratford-upon-avon.
Favourite ever Stratford Herald Headline from the 80's was a massive frontpage article titled 'U2's The Edge Spotted In Stratford-upon-avon'. Tells you everything you need to know about what a dull place Stratford-upon-avon is although we have given the world the drummer and keyboard of Suede and some young person's band named The Klaxons I believe.
Does anybody-else come from a town with less than a musical heritage ?

[mook]

My girlfriend is from Eastbourne, so she can boast of coming from the town that spawned both Leapy Lee and Toploader. Bet that makes you feel a shitload better about Stratford-upon-avon now doesn't it.

[zozman]

Just seen the youtube footage.  If they're aliens, they're pretty shit aliens.

[Huzzie]

Just seen the youtube footage.  If they're aliens, they're pretty shit aliens.

Link us then, ya cunt!

EDIT: I don't need you, Zoz! http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=3MJl-YTuYo8