Can we have a C&B marriage?

[Emma Raducanu]

Who'd be the groom? Who'd be the bride, the bridesmaid and the Vicar? Where would it be? How did the lucky two meet? In the toilets onboard a late night train?

I think [banned troll] would make an excellent Best Man. He could regale us with his encounters with the working class and how he'd played roulette with a pot noodle.

[monkhouse terror]

SOTS n buttgammon lol

(in there before everyone else)

[CaledonianGonzo]

Anyone been fucking for a while now?

[Oscar]

I have! I have!

[VegaLA]

Can we wait till my Divorce is final please ?
Cheers,
Love you !!

[Little Hoover]

Lalla and Zod. Because you know opposites attract, and Zod was at one point repeatedly insisiting he might be female for all we know.

[MissInformed]

We already did - Cerys and Still Not ppppppppllllyyyytthhhllllaaarrrggghhhhnnnttsstttttt, anyone?

SOTS n buttgammon lol

(in there before everyone else)

Hey, hey! Back off buddy! I do the match-making where SOTS and Buttgammon are concerned!

Anyone been fucking for a while now?

Ahem...*cough*

[Al Tha Funkee Homosapien]

Anyway SOTS is about 12 so unless buttgammon is under 16 it's all gonna get a bit Langham.

[SOTS]

He's younger than me. Not that that all matters because it's all COMPLETELY HYPOTHETICAL and MADE-UP.

[Ambient Sheep]

Ahem...*cough*

And we're not the only ones...there's another very lovely couple who actually met on here, but they're shy about it, and it's terribly sweet, so 'nuff said.

[Al Tha Funkee Homosapien]

He's younger than me. Not that that all matters because it's all COMPLETELY HYPOTHETICAL and MADE-UP.

Really?...So, what are you wearing?

[SOTS]

Clothes.

And we're not the only ones...there's another very lovely couple who actually met on here, but they're shy about it, and it's terribly sweet, so 'nuff said.

Oh, whoooo?

[Dusty Gozongas]

Oh, whoooo?

http://www.delia-derbyshire.org/

[Al Tha Funkee Homosapien]

Clothes.

Sexy clothes...?

No, don't answer that. Your silence says enough.

[buttgammon]

Oh, and we're both legal for the record so anything goes. Expect to see pictures of my cock everyone if I actually drink that 'eau de figue liquer' that's currently in my living room.

I wouldn't mind having a civil partnership ceremony with [banned troll] just so I could divorce him.

[Small Man Big Horse]

I'd end up being the fucking usher. It's always the same, I get told "You're like my best mate and everything but I have to ask my brother / nephew / some twat he doesn't really like just so as not to upset other relatives or people in our social circuit. And the amount of times I've been told "Man, I wish I'd chosen you, I'm really sorry" bugs the fuck out of me, I mean christ, one friend even chose a fucking girl to be his best man rather than me. But when they need someone to clear up or set up chairs who do they ask? Me, every fucking time. Well fuck you, I'm not going to be your usher, and I'm not going to your wedding because why the fuck should I spend £50 attending a celebration of your love? Christ, you're fucking unsuited anyway and you'll split up five years down the line but will I get my fucking toaster back? No. Cunts.

This is one of those drunken posts I'll regret submitting in the morning. Ah well. Fuckers.

[Ambient Sheep]

Oh, and we're both legal for the record so anything goes. Expect to see pictures of my cock everyone if I actually drink that 'eau de figue liquer' that's currently in my living room.

Whooaaaaa there buddy, don't you even THINK about doing that.  You may be over the age-of-consent, sunshine, but you're not yet 18, and thus if you even TAKE a picture of your cock, let alone show it to anybody, then you are in possession of child pornography and, if caught, will be prosecuted and placed on the Sex Offenders Register for being an auto-nonce.  You think I'm joking?  Sadly, I'm not.  If you then posted it on a thread here, every single one of us who opened the thread could then be prosecuted too.

You may be rude with young lady SOTS as much as you like (with her consent, naturally), but put those mobiles and digital cameras away while you do it.  And noooo naughty webcamming either.  You heard me!

[SOTS]

if I actually drink that 'eau de figue liquer'

That sounds like something that could make you sick just my looking at it.

You may be rude with young lady SOTS as much as you like (with her consent, naturally), but put those mobiles and digital cameras away while you do it.  And noooo naughty webcamming either.  You heard me!

It's like one of those things that if people say it enough people believe it to be true.

[Oscar]

This is one of those drunken posts I'll regret submitting in the morning. Ah well. Fuckers.

Small Man Big Hose, stop your flapping about being the best man.
Will you...will you marry me?

Please, i will be the happiest Grouch in all the world if you make me Oscar Big Hose.

[buttgammon]

I don't think I'll be going near that stuff anyway because while I would implicate you all with you looking at it (albeit inadvertantly) I'd get myself into trouble for technically drinking underage, anyway. So I wouldn't want to risk a minor wrist-slapping while getting all of you accused of being paedos.

[Ambient Sheep]

I don't think I'll be going near that stuff anyway because while I would implicate you all with you looking at it (albeit inadvertantly) I'd get myself into trouble for technically drinking underage, anyway. So I wouldn't want to risk a minor wrist-slapping while getting all of you accused of being paedos.

I don't think you quite get it...you'd be nicked for paedo-ism as much as we would!

Still, I agree that that doesn't compare to the rap for underage drinking, now that's REALLY serious stuff!

[buttgammon]

Well, yeah. Much like how I'm sure the penalty for stealing a small post-it note would be more than for some kind of online paedophiliac activity.

I think I get it. It would be legally impossible for me to consent to others viewing pornographic images of me even though I am above the age of consent because I am under 18, is that correct?

[Small Man Big Horse]

Small Man Big Hose, stop your flapping about being the best man.
Will you...will you marry me?

Please, i will be the happiest Grouch in all the world if you make me Oscar Big Hose.

How could I say no to that?

So yes!

There are rules though. The main one being that I'll stay at home and keep the house nice whilst you bring in the money.

[Fry]

Whooaaaaa there buddy, don't you even THINK about doing that.  You may be over the age-of-consent, sunshine, but you're not yet 18, and thus if you even TAKE a picture of your cock, let alone show it to anybody, then you are in possession of child pornography and, if caught, will be prosecuted and placed on the Sex Offenders Register for being an auto-nonce.  You think I'm joking?  Sadly, I'm not.  If you then posted it on a thread here, every single one of us who opened the thread could then be prosecuted too.

You may be rude with young lady SOTS as much as you like (with her consent, naturally), but put those mobiles and digital cameras away while you do it.  And noooo naughty webcamming either.  You heard me!

I don't believe that at all. I might just take picture sof my cock and...fuck how can I twist this for my own epic lolz?

[Oscar]

So yes!

There are rules though. The main one being that I'll stay at home and keep the house nice whilst you bring in the money.

Fabulous! I just I just don't know what to say.
It's going to be such a beautiful life we have together. You in your pinny, holding a rolling pin to batter the mice for dinner. Me passed out on the dog, muttering romantic poems. Imagine our kids!
You don't mind if I make the money through prostitution do you?

[Small Man Big Horse]

It was kind of what I was hoping to be honest. That way after being used abused all day long, coming home to me would seem like light relief in comparison, despite the pyschological torment I'd no doubt but you through. Aww!

[Oscar]

*giggle* you can "but me through" any day, Small Man.

Although I think i should say now, when I mentioned prostitution I meant I was selling your body, not mine.
I'll be doing all the work in sales and advertising, you'll mostly just be lying down(ish) so it's not really work for you.

[Dusty Gozongas]

Whooaaaaa there buddy, don't you even THINK about doing that.  You may be over the age-of-consent, sunshine, but you're not yet 18, and thus if you even TAKE a picture of your cock, let alone show it to anybody, then you are in possession of child pornography and, if caught, will be prosecuted and placed on the Sex Offenders Register for being an auto-nonce.  You think I'm joking?  Sadly, I'm not.  If you then posted it on a thread here, every single one of us who opened the thread could then be prosecuted too.

You may be rude with young lady SOTS as much as you like (with her consent, naturally), but put those mobiles and digital cameras away while you do it.  And noooo naughty webcamming either.  You heard me!

Erm....

Am I alone in thinking that you may be showing an over-compensating interest in certain matters Sheepy?


Steady on and hold your horses and whoah there me hearty.

And who hasn't?

That should probably have been 'whom' though, and I apologise.

[Ambient Sheep]

And who hasn't what?  (I'm genuinely confused by what you mean there, I can read it at least two, if not three different ways.)  I'll reply properly once I know what I'm replying to...

[Dusty Gozongas]

T'was worded as such.

Best left, I reckon.