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Confession time!

Started by alan nagsworth, September 02, 2007, 06:46:25 AM

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alan nagsworth

Dunno if this has done before/Can't be arsed to do a search etc etc.

Assuming there are a fair few of us here that don't know each other in real life whatsoever, this place is ideal for making confessions you could never tell the people who actually exist physically in your real life. Relax, your mates aren't looking over your shoulder, let it out... post a confession!

Once, when I was a kid, my dog gave birth to puppies and I remember throwing one in the air and catching it, you know, like an adult does to a child affectionately, and I dropped it on the floor. At the time I felt devastated and I've never even told my mates about it. Shocking.

mister_enmity

OK *gulp*

I don't know how to ride a bike.

weekender

I once had a wank in a park at midnight just because I could.

Suttonpubcrawl

I once had a wank in a public toilet just because I could.

alan nagsworth

I hope to god these are real. Not in the sense that it adds that extra reality to my vile thoughts, but because I'm taking it seriously! Also sorry for the seemingly abrupt end to my opening post, someone was literally looking over my shoulder, and it was a family member. Keep 'em comin' folks!

no_offenc

I'm fairly shite at swimming for some reason.

buttgammon

Quote from: no_offenc on September 02, 2007, 04:36:43 PM
I'm fairly shite at swimming for some reason.

I am too, possibly because I can't swim.

Cack Hen

I once inserted a pencil into my dogs anus. Just because I could.

Marvin

I kissed my ex-girlfriend's brother in front of her, and then kissed her in the same evening. Just because I could.

TotalNightmare

i like the new confession caveat "...just because I could..."

because i can now feel comfortable in confessing the following:

I raped and robbed this teenager infront of her family... just because i could...






...and then i got off the bus...

Hank_Kingsley

Ooh Marvin, you must be some sort of Bowie-esque pansexual pixie. An ex-girlfriend and her brother. In the same evening. I hope you were wearing eyeliner and a feather boa at the time.
I once stole 6 bottles of martini extra dry from an employer, just because I could. I don't even particularly like the stuff but I was on a bit of a thievery kick back then.

Hypodeemic Nerdle

Quote from: Suttonpubcrawl on September 02, 2007, 04:06:32 PM
I once had a wank in a public toilet just because I could.
I had one in the Tameside Council building toilets when I was 16 & on the YTS.

no_offenc

Quote from: buttgammon on September 02, 2007, 04:51:40 PM
I am too, possibly because I can't swim.

Ah, you see, that's where we're different - I'm alright if it's breast stroke or something that involves a lot of kicking, but I can't put my face in the water (fear stemming from looooooooong ago) and I can't do back stroke or butterfly for the life of me.

buttgammon

I can't even float in the water. I'm worse than you!

And I am so clumsy I spilled three separate glasses and cups today - a glass of water, a cup of tea and a glass of wine which shattered and left me with red wine on my bedroom carpet. To make matters worse, my mother heard the commotion from downstairs and isn't too happy that I have stained my own carpet and smashed her glass and that I've become extremely clumsy. It's all a bit ridiculous. It's an accident and it's not as if I'm a naughty child. I can't wait to move out.

chocky909

I chewed on grass all day once, just because I cud.

Lady Beaner

I fucked Captain Birdseye once, just because I cod.

I fucked some dead foot & mouth cows once, just because I culled.

chocky909

I was accused of being a pigeon once, just because I cooed.

Al Tha Funkee Homosapien

I once made some wine hot and spicy once. Just because I mulled.

Marvin

I chewed some partially digested food from my own stomach once. Just because I cud.

AC

I smacked Tina once, just because Ike'd

I once had a common Turkish name, just because Aykud.

Hank_Kingsley

I once got buggered in prison, just because I cried.

quadraspazzed

I once organised a campaign of suicide bombings, just because Al Quds [should be liberated from the Zionist oppressor].

Small Man Big Horse

I made great comedy with Peter Cook once, just because I Dud.

Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth

I made a computer program once, just because I code.

alan nagsworth

I wanted to do all of the above but didn't, just because I couldn't.

Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth

I also fought evil once, just because I good.

Mr Colossal

Quote from: chocky909 on September 02, 2007, 08:04:34 PM
I was accused of being a pigeon once, just because I cooed.


Well, I shit on a pigeon once, just because I crud.

Hank_Kingsley

Quote from: quadraspazzed on September 02, 2007, 08:54:51 PM
I once organised a campaign of suicide bombings, just because Al Quds [should be liberated from the Zionist oppressor].

Interesting. I kill A-rabs because Likud.*




* Likud may not kill Arabs. I am a friend of Jew and Gentile alike. Shalom.