Tits out at 8

[Mister Six]

I think all this nudity-before-9-is-ok-as-long-as-it's-a-health-issue stems from This Morning some years ago when they had a bloke on messing about with his testicles looking for cancer.

Followed by page 3 model Leilani getting her tits felt up by the show's GP for a piece about breast cancer.

Nice work if you can get it...

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

tits at eight
I cannae wait

tits at nine
that'll do fine

tits at ten
tell me when

tits at eleven
I'm in heaven

tits at twelve
I'm all wanked out by then so they don't excite me too much

otherwise known as wanker's ring cycle

[Bogey]

What's going on with those Herbal Essences adverts? All the women are blatantly having orgasms.

Except they aren't. Or so it seems to me - it sounds like they've been told to make sounds that resemble but don't replicate climax-noises. The "yes! yes! yes!" sounds more like they've just won £25 on a scratchcard or something. As a result they have an erotic factor of zero.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

The ASA probably do have an orgasm sound-scale. Moan too authentically and watch your shiny advert disappear back into the edit suite.

"'Scuse love, could you cum slightly less realistically please?"

[Famous Mortimer]

Followed by page 3 model Leilani getting her tits felt up by the show's GP for a piece about breast cancer.

Nice work if you can get it...

From "What's New, Pussycat?"

Victor Skakapopulis: I've got something at the striptease. I help the girls dress and undress.
Michael James: Nice job.
Victor Skakapopulis: Twenty francs a week.
Michael James: Not very much.
Victor Skakapopulis: It's all I can afford.

[ziggy starbucks]

tits at noon
never too soon

tits at one
trousers gone

tits at two
knob ache, I will rue

tits at three
time for a sex wee

tits at four
I want more

tits at five
make me alive

tits at six
hands on dicks

[Lookalike Mark Chapman]

One two three o'clock, four o'clock, cock.

Someone said 'shit!' on Come Dine With Me the other week (so that would have been about 3 in the afternoon). I was a little shocked because  I always thought 'shit' was worse than 'crap' and only slightly down from 'fuck,' but, yeah, I've heard it all hours of the day on the radio too, so apparently I'm being a bit puritanical. As for tits - they don't interest me much. But there's definitely a perfume advert where the guy's got his arse out.

[ziggy starbucks]

is this an inappropriate thread to say how much I hate seeing baby's bottoms in nappy adverts. I don't need to see baby bottoms and shame on the parents for taking cash for essentially exposing their naked, helpless children on national tv.

They don't show adult's bottoms in diarrhea or pile cream adverts. Why? Because that would be bizarre and sick. But they think its ok to show baby bottoms, despite the evilness that comes out of them.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

is this an inappropriate thread to say how much I hate seeing baby's bottoms in nappy adverts

No, although if you

A) loved them
B) hated seeing the bottoms encased in nappies and wanted the bare arsecheeks large and in charge

...then it might be.

My threads have a very clear bottoms policy.

[alan nagsworth]

is this an inappropriate thread to say how much I hate seeing baby's bottoms in nappy adverts. I don't need to see baby bottoms and shame on the parents for taking cash for essentially exposing their naked, helpless children on national tv.

Yeah this is a beef I've had for some time. Especially when I'm eating my dinner, it's not on. It's sick is what it is.

[deadly lampshade]

I think you can say almost anything on Radio 4 at 6.30pm, except fuck and cunt. I've definitley heard shit, bastard and most 'lesser' expletives.

One of the guests on the dreadful Moral Maze last night said "fuck"! At 8pm!

(Cue mass outbreak of tutting across Middle England, angry letters to Feedback about decaying moral standards, etc...)

[Captain Crunch]

BB3 are planning a whole series on tits:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/showsandtours/beonashow/shows/boob_job_junkies.shtml

[mcbpete]

Channel 4 allow the words "shit" and "piss" before 9 now too, I noticed it last year and thought they were probably violating some set-in-stone law, even though I obviously wasn't personally offended.

Yeah 'shit' and 'piss' is fine at 8.

In fact (and this is a weird one) 'piss' is fine during the day, however the only time you can't say it is in the phrase: "Piss off", so "I've pissed myself" (which appeared in Home and Away a few months back) is fine, but "Piss off you blaggard" isn't.

And non-sexual nudity is fine pre-watershed too. You might [but probably don't] remember Keith Chegwin's Nude Jungle as part of five's nudey nudey week, where nudists scampered around doing challenges in a jungle in the nip which I believe was on at 20.00

[Spang!]

Who was the children's TV presenter who said that before long you would be able to say 'fuck' at 3pm? Was it Andy Crane?

[El Unicornio, mang]

I say 'fuck' at 3pm all the time

[Howj Begg]

Simon Parkin? I remember how the beeb were already unhapppy about him turning the air blue at 4pm. No wonder he never got the permanent gig.

[Fry]

I say 'fuck' at 3pm all the time

That's probably why you don't present cbeebies anymore.

[buttgammon]

Another pre-watershed 'piss off' - just now on Waterloo Road.

It doesn't phase me in the slightest, though hearing 'shit' at this hour tends to.

[Pylon Man]

is this an inappropriate thread to say how much I hate seeing baby's bottoms in nappy adverts. I don't need to see baby bottoms and shame on the parents for taking cash for essentially exposing their naked, helpless children on national tv.

Personally I hate that advert with the bloody 7 year old (or however old he is) having a poo. And then saying how much it stinks.

[weekender]

Personally I hate that advert with the bloody 7 year old (or however old he is) having a poo. And then saying how much it stinks.

Precocious maybe, but he's quite a clever 7-year old to appreciate the negative power of advertising.

[mothman]

I was cheered to see/hear the person 3rd-in-line for the throne of this country talking about having a shit at 7.05pm on national news.

[George Oscar Bluth II]

BB3 are planning a whole series on tits:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/showsandtours/beonashow/shows/boob_job_junkies.shtml

Pramface Mansion

[rudi]

I was cheered to see/hear the person 3rd-in-line for the throne of this country talking about having a shit at 7.05pm on national news.

I feel for the NCO he has to wipe his pampered arse.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

I remember being mildly unsettled by someone saying "crap" on Grange Hill.

Which is essentially bullshit given schools are the number one source of profanity in the world.

[semtex]

Sports interviews regularly feature bollocks and piss.

And that's outside the changing rooms.

That reminds me of watching some football match or other on Sky. Whilst interviewing one of the players in the tunnel just before the match, someone (the coach i think) can be heard yelling "fucking come on lads!!" Not bad for 3 in the afternoon.

[alan nagsworth]

In fact (and this is a weird one) 'piss' is fine during the day, however the only time you can't say it is in the phrase: "Piss off", so "I've pissed myself" (which appeared in Home and Away a few months back) is fine, but "Piss off you blaggard" isn't.

I was watching something on ABC1 (that's right, I went there) a while back and a kid who couldn't've been older than 11 says to his in-show dad, "You pissed him off, didn't you." This was at 2pm!

Terry Wogan's calm Irish tones didn't do justice to the fury and vehemence I put into the complaint letter, scrawled on a pizza box with a burnt match though it was.

[Ginyard]

Thinking of Wogan, I remember Don Johnson on his evening show years back. Terry was chatting to him via live feed from America when Johnson suddenly said 'wanker'. He then told him he must know what a wanker is. This was at about 7pm. Odd stuff.

[mcbpete]

I was watching something on ABC1 (that's right, I went there) a while back and a kid who couldn't've been older than 11 says to his in-show dad, "You pissed him off, didn't you." This was at 2pm!

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention the other bizarre caveat of piss, although 'Piss off' isn't allowed till 8pm, 'Pissed off'/'Pissed Him Off' etc. is fine any time.

[Pogue Mahone]

That reminds me of watching some football match or other on Sky. Whilst interviewing one of the players in the tunnel just before the match, someone (the coach i think) can be heard yelling "fucking come on lads!!" Not bad for 3 in the afternoon.

Did this go out live?

[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GwcpFXOsrY8&feature=related[/youtube]

[The Mumbler]

And non-sexual nudity is fine pre-watershed too. You might [but probably don't] remember Keith Chegwin's Nude Jungle as part of five's nudey nudey week, where nudists scampered around doing challenges in a jungle in the nip which I believe was on at 20.00

Naked Jungle actually went out at 10.55pm on 6 June 2000.

Only Fools & Horses got away with a lot, especially Christmas specials. Rodney's "Shiiitt!" on wiping the computer's information turns up in the first ten minutes of The Jolly Boys' Outing, first broadcast on Christmas Day 1989 at 4.50pm. Its near-universal popularity probably helped.