Friday Fun Thread!!!

[Lookalike Mark Chapman]

That's right, it's the Friday Fun Thread!

Possibly a terrible idea, but here it is anyway. Just a silly creative thread, really, but (here's the twist!) there'll be a different challenge set every week. The new challenge will be posted, somewhat surprisingly, on Fridays. The kind of threads I love basically start out with a fairly simple concept, a silly idea summed up in a paragraph or less, which then inspires all you intelligent and witty 'whores to get all witty and intelligent on our asses. Fake TV shows is a great example of the kind of topic I mean – but here, the challenge will change every week, within the same thread. It's not all about the Fridays – hopefully we'll post silly things all week until next Friday, at which point someone thinks up a new theme, and so on. So it's a bit like a textual version of B3ta's Image Challenge, or a forum-based version of Adam and Joe's Text The Nation. Hopefully it'll provide a bit of fun for people at work (or even not) and engender 'that Friday feeling' without resorting to excessive Crunchie consumption. And with this type of thread, once you know the theme you can pop Notepad open without your boss noticing too much, and be thinking up funny things - even when the website is playing up - to paste in later. Clearly, I've thought of everything. Is this a shit idea? I'm sure you'll all tell me. In the meantime – CHALLENGE WEEK 1!

I've thought long and hard (fnaar) about the first theme, and I think, really, there could be only one. Iiiiiit's.... PARALLEL PORN TITLES! Oh, you know what I mean – sexed-up versions of real film titles, as if they'd made a naughty version. Mainly puns I'd imagine, and the more depraved the better - as if you needed prompting. Classics of the genre already out there include The Ass Menagerie, Saturday Night Beaver, Phallus in Wonderland, Shaving Ryan's Privates, Doing John Malkovich, The Godfather's Parts – II, Good Will Humping, Night of the Giving Head, Snatch Adams, Intercourse With A Vampire, On Her Majesty's Secret Cervix, Sperms of Endearment, Lawrence of A Labia, Assablanca, Queer and Present Danger, Wet Dreams May Come, Inspect Her Gadget, Pam's Labia Rinse, You've Got Male Genitalia, and - of course - Cool Bummings.

Sometimes it's fun imagining what the films would be like, how they'd link to the films that inspired their titles. Sometimes the humour stems from the inappropriateness of the source film - Schindler's Fist, for example. Feel free to add more existing parody titles – even real porn titles – if they're funny, but I'd love if we could come up with a good set of our own as well. The list above should have given you some idea of what I'm on about - so if you're at home, have a glance at your DVD shelf, then try shoehorning the odd 'penis' in there (if you're at work, just imagine it). Here's what I've come up with so far -


Men In Black Men
A Lady and A Tramp
All Quiet on the Western Front Bottom
Austin showers
The Fourteen Year Old Virgin
Fanny McPhee
The Merchant of Penis
Bearded-clambusters
Five Children 'Do' It
Men In Black Men II
The Brothers Quim
The Constant Ladygardener
and
Three Men and A Little Vaseline


It's that simple. It's that puerile. So ...your turn, perhaps? Go on. You know you wanna. I'll try and come up with a new theme (and some examples) every Friday. If you want.

*post*

[Murdo]

Forrest Pump
Sleepy Swallow
Enema at the Gates
Black Cock Down
Bum and Bummer
Twelve Horny Men
The Cock
Big

[Lookalike Mark Chapman]

Nice! Very nice. Although I may have gone for 'Sloppy Hollow' :)

[biggytitbo]

G*A*S*H

[Danger Man]

Position: Impossible

[Blumf]

Edward Scissorglans

[the midnight watch baboon]

Amateur Anal: There Will be Blood
The Magnificent Semen
Buffalo  '69
First Cunt Is The Deepest
Diving Miss Daisy
'IN MAN' EMPIRE
Will*E
Dogging Gay Afternoon
Amateur Anal II: Do The Wrong Thing
Cocky
Rubbing Hood
Children (wank) of(f) Men
Beavers and Buttplug

[Murdo]

Bum After Reading
Milky
Max Pain

[biggytitbo]

Throbbing Hood: Men in tight.

[Deadman97]

[Lookalike Mark Chapman]

The Curious Case of Benjamin's Bottom
School of Cock
Grosse Pointe Wank
Invasion of the Bloody Snatches
Scatwoman
The Shawspank Redemption
Meet Ho Black
Stop! Or My Cum Will Shoot
Thelma, Louise, and a Golden Retriever

[the midnight watch baboon]

The Postman Always Rims Twice
Goodfellatias
The Empire Sucks Black

[chocky909]

Todd Solanz's "A Penis"
"The Long Fuck Goodnight"
"Hitch-Hiker's Guide To The Clitoris"

[MuteBanana]

New Coonts* Try Four Old Men
Nicki and Norah's Intimate Gay Tryst

*I'm going for number 3 on the Urban Dictionary listing.

[chocky909]

The Italian Blow/Hand/Foot Job
Brazil(ian)
Withnail And Jap's I
Jackie's Brown

[wherearethespoons]

Queer Window
Dr. Stranglove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bum
Swallow Hal
The Gays
White Men Can't Hump
Big Knobs and Huge Dicks
A Beautiful Grind
Clithanger
The Wanker Man
Cocky V
Bum Hur
Die Hard-on
Wank Girl
The Jizzness
Children of the Porn
Booby and the Beast
Sexy The Elephant Man
The Likely Nads
Driving Miss Daisy (into a little dark lay by and fucking the dirty slut senseless)

[petula dusty]

Dirty Bottom Scoundrels
Girl With A Pearl Necklace
Trouser Snakes On A Plane
Phwooooar! Games
Reach For The Thigh
He's Just Not That Far Into You

[Gradual Decline]

Tortilla Flaps (this actually exists)
The Cock-Eyed World (...and this)
The Final Cuntdown
Fanny Hall
Willy Elliot
Things To Come (On My Tits)

[wherearethespoons]

The Italian Blow/Hand/Foot Job

The Wank Job

[Cambrian Times]

Sex and the Clitty
101 Penetrations
The Pound of the Ass-kervilles
Uncle Suck
Ho Alone or Homo Alone

[Ginyard]

Dog Spray Afternoon

[gmoney]

Clitty Clitty Gang Bang
Sexual Predator
On Heat in the Night
Filthy Harry
Goodnight and Good Fucking

These are terrible.

[Ginyard]

Analdeus

[Glebe]

Heh!

[Ginyard]

3 Men to Your Ma

[OG Mudbone]

Pearl Necklace Harbour
Arlington's Load (so sorry)
Dead Man Fucking
Taken (Up the Arse)
Mr Holland's Anus
Bollock (as in Pollock)
Minorities Re-Porked
Tit-Tantric (hmmmm, dubious)

[Ginyard]

Schindler's Fist

[Ginyard]

Two hounds and some cum: a face odyssey

[Ginyard]

To drill a cock in bird

[chocky909]

Clear And Present Wanger

EDIT

Oh oh! Mine and Ginyard's previous two were posted on a Saturday. Therefore we lose.



Hurray!