Facebook II

[phes]

http://www.fbpurity.com/

This thing has saved me from certain homicide. Now my friends are quiet, contained and respectable individuals once more! I don't ever have to see them joining groups, liking pages, or find out who has changed their profile pictures ever again! There are so many features to it that you can choose to hide. You could pretty much block everything from your news feed besides status updates if you wanted to.

I just can't get Safari to run Greasekit to input this code and it's DRIVING ME MAD.

Phes... IS LOSING HIS MIND.

[MuteBanana]

How does that Chris Rock bit go again?

http://www.facebook.com/pages/My-children-mean-everything-to-me/95718937090

Also

It's
"Sons Week" If you have a son who makes your life interesting and fun,
has been a blessing in your life, and makes your life worth living by
just being around, copy and paste this to your status..

[Hank_Kingsley]

This site seems to be an aggregator of things that people have "liked" on Facebook. Fairly bleak, although not for typical reasons of racism etc. but more the vast amount of nonsensical things people are willing to publically approve on the internet.

I think that's really cool, LOL JK I think it's shit!

[Uncle TechTip]

"opening the freezer doors soo they fog up and u get too draw smiley faaces(:" - 23,000 likes

That's wrong on about four levels. Also, upside-down smilies, who in the world does this?

[rudi]

I just assumed it was a speller and faaces should have been spelt faeces.

[Ambient Sheep]

This FBPurity thing sounds ace!  I don't want to hide my friends outright, but yes, I don't need to know every time they've liked some crap or won an award on some shitty Flash game.  I might well look into that, thanks!

[alan nagsworth]

No problem. :) The one thing that made me get it was when I saw "

• friends liked 'I'm going to laugh when karma punches you in the face.'"
  
  THAT IS NOT HOW KARMA WORKS

[MuteBanana]

Finally something to post. Abortion drama!

1st girl is 27. 2nd girl is 15. No idea how old the other two are.

1st girl - Fuk this shit now made up my mind no wat im doin fuk friday it aint im my mind now fuk wat ppl think mite be evil but its my life after 2nite i dnt even care its my life

2nd girl - WELL IF YOUU GET RIDD OF IT THAT IS EVIL. JUST LIKE DRINKING CIDER AT A TIME LIKE THIS.

1st girl - Wtf dnt even drink cider thanks

2nd girl - DIRTY LITTLE TRAMP THEN AINT YAHH IF YOUU USED SUMMINK IT WOULDNT HAVE HAPPENED.

2nd girl - YOU DRANK SOME YESTERDAY YOU FUCKING LYING SLUT.

3rd girl - She's entitled 2 make her own decisions,u do wots best 4 u Hun,doesn't make u any less of a person

2nd girl - YEAH EVEN IF SHE IS HARMING A LITTLE BABY BUT THATS ALRIGHT BECAUSE SHES ENTITLED TO AY.

3rd girl - yeah actually she is,its her body so no1 else's business.wot about all those ppl that have 2 get rid of em 4 serious reasons,life or death or because of the result of a rape?

1st girl - Wtf i had half a glas wiv orangeade who the fuk are u to diktake to my life u dnt like my life if u got saink to say cum say it to my face

3rd girl - dont let any1 tell u wot u can and cant do.....stupid girl has no idea x

1st girl - Yea u no that diny cunt

4th girl - wots this?? a teeny bop trying to tell u all about her sex education lession that she has just learnt at school lmfao dont think that she got to the part yet where it says u are actually allowed a unit a day of alcohol

1st girl - Yea u no that lol dnt think she got to that part at all her self u aint seen state ov it omg sily litle girl thinkin it can dictate to me wrong move i tel ya

4th girl -  lol she cant have any kids by her comments.....one day one day then lets see her opinions then pmsl

1st girl - Yea u no that omg i was pised off wen i read her coments oh wel hope she ends up wiv a right cunt and lives the life ay omg teeny bopers think they now what life is
----

And yes there probably is an easier way of doing that then copy/paste. But sod it, its done now.

[Uncle TechTip]

"if u got saink to say cum say it to my face" is a glorious sentence. Saink, will this be in the dictionary in ten years?

Now let's hope the next Facebook snapshot isn't the Gateshead gunman... reading the articles it seems Facebook is central to the whole story. What do they do at times like this, would the police get automatic right to find out IP addresses and such? He's been posting since - though the hitlist reports sound fishy, only because nobody can see it except his 87 friends. I expect these are all being phished as we speak.

[El Unicornio, mang]

The first girl is 27?? She definitely needs to have an abortion, for the unborn baby's sake if nothing else

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

In Hypothetical Internet Justice World, the tale ends with the one horrified about girl 1's abortion getting into a fight with her (very plausible indeed, reading the above) and accidentally falcon-punching her into a miscarriage and 40 barren years of sterility.

Yes, it's wrong, and I do feel bad for thinking like this.

[El Unicornio, mang]

I'm disappointed no-one said "She aint werf it!", but I think maybe people only say that on Eastenders.

[MuteBanana]

Considering the 15 year old seems to the brightest, maybe that's a good sign for future generations.

I like how one justifies the pregnant woman having an abortion by bringing up reasons 'life or death or rape' when none of these apply to her friend.

[Milo]

Aye, as if those instances are somehow more valid, when in reality all reasons are equally valid.

[MALCOLM]

Why do people write/type like that?

I can't believe that's the absolute peak of their spelling abilities, so is it for attention? is it somehow quicker to type if somewhat longer to decipher? is it seen as cool or something?

[MuteBanana]

Update:

15 year old girl - WTF EMMA ID KNOCK YOUU OUT YOU CUNT AND DONT KNOW WHAT YOUR MATES ARE ON ABOUT OR DONT THEY KNOW THE DAD IS THE SAME AGE AS ME LOL

4th girl - it doesnt matter how old the dad is its not ur kid... and im not a friend im a relative thanks aunt to the other kids.... so wots ur problem with emma having a cider and being pregnant??? ur only wot?? 15 sort ur life out hun or is u jealous coz she got to that bloke and u didnt!!!!

I think the 15 year old should just give up personally. I'm not actually friends with her, but I might send her a message to tell her she's got her head screwed on. Unlike these girls with 10+ years on her.

[Utter Shit]

Thinking all abortion is evil regardless of the scenario is "having your head screwed on"?

[MALCOLM]

I wish someone would burn down facebook

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Why do people write/type like that?

I can't believe that's the absolute peak of their spelling abilities, so is it for attention? is it somehow quicker to type if somewhat longer to decipher? is it seen as cool or something?

Quite often it's people texting to facebook from their mobiles, which we can all agree was a terrible, terrible thing for technology to allow us access to.

[MuteBanana]

Thinking all abortion is evil regardless of the scenario is "having your head screwed on"?

Well that's obviously a bit of an over reaction. But she at least knows that having unprotected sex with an underage lad, drinking while pregnant and then opting for an abortion isn't exactly behaviour to be proud of.

[petula dusty]

Yes, she should have the child because that would make everything right.

[rudi]

Well that's obviously a bit of an over reaction. But she at least knows that having unprotected sex with an underage lad, drinking while pregnant and then opting for an abortion isn't exactly behaviour to be proud of.

But calling the mother evil etc is perfectly fine. Right.

"Saink"? That'd make them well southern, right?

[chand]

I too am slightly baffled that you see this 15-year-old as the voice of reason. In four shouty sentences she declares abortion evil, and calls the other girl a "tramp" and a "slut" and berates her for drinking an unspecified amount of cider. And then makes a fifth post threatening to knock the other girl out?

[rudi]

<stage whisper> _{*I think MB is that 15 year old girl*}

[vrailaine]

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Music/112936425387489

Seriously? 10 of my "friends"(out of 70) have liked this? Over 7 million in total? Jesus Christ.






EDIT-Ahhhhhhh, it's just for the "interests" section of the profile, phew.

[Still Not George]

As an aside, I had an almost unbearably awesome idea for a Facebook game the other day. Can't talk about it for obvious reasons, but watch this space.

Previously I had seriously considered creating a game called "Intermittent Reinforcement" in which playes click repeatedly on a large box which releases items after a random number of clicks. Said items could then be shared with other players and collected to gain meaningless achievements with names like "Meaningless Achievement".

[Stanley Turbine]

Well that's obviously a bit of an over reaction. But she at least knows that having unprotected sex with an underage lad, drinking while pregnant and then opting for an abortion isn't exactly behaviour to be proud of.

Surely the one time it is perfectly fine to drink as much alcohol as you want while pregnant is when you're going to have an abortion? What is there to be worried about? That the dead foetus might have brain damage?

[spanky]

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Music/112936425387489

Seriously? 10 of my "friends"(out of 70) have liked this? Over 7 million in total? Jesus Christ.






EDIT-Ahhhhhhh, it's just for the "interests" section of the profile, phew.

Sadly, I'd seen people 'like' it before Facebook converted your interests into fan page form.

[vrailaine]

Sadly, I'd seen people 'like' it before Facebook converted your interests into fan page form.

Did they really like music?

[Still Not George]

Did they really like music?

Bear in mind how many CVs have "listening to music" in the Interests bit.