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"I'm presenting Blue Peter, Ironically"

Started by Retinend, March 23, 2010, 05:08:25 PM

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Retinend

Anyone catch Blue Peter these days? There's one jerk of a presenter who is an absolute constable. Just two examples from the show I saw... #1: whilst celebrating their viewers' achievement of raising a considerable sum for a charity who finance operations for Indian children with cleft lips, this guy says "well done nation!" ... followed with a wry smirk and two, Brent-like triggers pointed at the camera. Then he smirks at some mate of his off-screen. #2: Not much later, he's interviewing the actress who plays Nannie McPhee about the new film in which she plays Nannie McPhee, and invites her across the set. She starts walking ahead of him and he says "oh wait, I should show the way. I'm the presenter, aren't I? ho ho ho". This is by no means acceptable. Is there anything we can do to stop him?

Goldentony

I propose relaunching Magpie as a straight laced news service

biggytitbo

Is it as bad as that time Mark Curry got his arse out in the 80s?

Gulftastic

That's Joel, and he's harmless enough! He is soon to leave for Hollywood, as his BP challenge this year is to try and get a part on TV in the US, so there'll be some amusing scenes of him auditioning. They'll probalby not show him sucking off the Casting Director.

Besides, when you've got lovely Helen Skelton on there, who cares who else it on?


buttgammon

She's not a patch of Mabel, though. At the risk of sounding a bit sexist, she's one sexy bitch.

biggytitbo

I'd certainly like to have an expedition up Helen Skelton's amazon.

Gulftastic

Quote from: buttgammon on March 23, 2010, 06:08:40 PM
She's not a patch of Mabel, though. At the risk of sounding a bit sexist, she's one sexy bitch.

She retires at the end of this month. She is now 15 years old. Granny Dog Porn.

buttgammon

She's still looking pretty fit, I have to say. Age is just a number; a lovely shiny coat is more important to me.

DJ Solid Snail

That's clearly a slightly disguised Richard Bacon.

And is it just that I'm getting old now, or am I right in thinking none of the hosts look like proper grown-ups anymore?

boxofslice

Maybe it's my age but catching BP recently the current presenters seem to come from the same agency that gives us the kind of twats they get to present T4.

biggytitbo

#11
Valerie Singleton was only about 20 when she started doing Blue Peter. It's just in those days young people looked like your auntie and were more sensible.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Valerie Singleton spent most of her teens with severe Crohn's disease, which left her dilapidated and, aptly, a singleton.

biggytitbo

She's like me, she farts like a dying dog so no-one wants to go out with her.

The best Blue peter moment was when Konnie and Liz modelled Victorian corsets.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

I preferred it when the presenters had to explain to the kids what cocaine was, because of Richard Bacon.

kidsick5000

Quote from: biggytitbo on March 23, 2010, 08:01:50 PM
She's like me, she farts like a dying dog so no-one wants to go out with her.

The best Blue peter moment was when Konnie and Liz modelled Victorian corsets.

Was it better than when they did it in the 80's with special guest Maggie Philbin?


Google image there, making sure memories are tarnished with the cold light of reality

biggytitbo

A 10 year old girl and a bunch of tarts modeling saucy underwear on childrens TV. It was a more innocent time...sigh.

The Widow of Brid

Quote from: biggytitbo on March 23, 2010, 08:01:50 PM
The best Blue peter moment was when Konnie and Liz modelled Victorian corsets.

There was also the time when they went to the beach in Brazil in sensible swimsuits were told they needed to 'dress like the locals' - put on skimpy bikinis, basically - and then played volleyball.

I love that sequence both for the obvious reasons, and for the fact that it was clearly put out solely to make any viewers over the age of ten wonder whether it had actually happened or if Konnie Huq's busts had finally sent them deranged and they'd hallucinated it all. 

biggytitbo

Konnie is a saucy mare. I remember when she did celebrity fame academy wearing a sheer dress and she clearly had no bra on the minx.

I also once made up a rude limerick about her.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

I would literally fuck my own chin to share even ten minutes of bedroom action with Huq.

Personal info goldmine nugget: my first ever wank was watching Konnie Huq on Blue Peter.

A cumstained mess generally accompanied her appearances on screen. But enough about Stuart Miles and how he got the job. She's a fine, fine figure of a woman and I would very much like to have sex with her.

biggytitbo

10 minutes bah. Give me half an hour with Konnie Huq and she'll really know what sticky back plastic is.

Quote from: thehungerartist on March 23, 2010, 10:47:10 PM
Personal info goldmine nugget: my first ever wank was watching Konnie Huq on Blue Peter.

You've gone up in my estimation. Welcome to 'Ignore'.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

I had wanked long before Konnie Huq's potentially prepubescent first appearance on Blue Peter.

I just want to make that CLEAR RIGHT NOW.


The only downside I can imagine to the Huq Fuq would be her stupid sidewards nasal cud-chew of a voice.

biggytitbo

I had a wank before she was born even though she's older than me.


brb.


Shoulders?-Stomach!



biggytitbo