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New Meaning to 'Oral' Education

Started by @ssmaster, May 11, 2004, 11:33:02 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

@ssmaster

UK pupils to get lessons in oral sex!
http://www.webindia123.com/news/showdetails.asp?id=37757&cat=World

Which bright spark thought up this idea, this is just a lazy solution to teenage pregnancy problems.

<laddish mode> Mind you I would have loved my old French teacher to teach me oral. </laddish mode>

hencole

QuoteHowever, Tory MP Ann Widdecombe insisted, "If you tell young people how to do it, they will do it and end up increasing pregnancies."

Poor Ann still not knowing how babies are made at her age.

chand

QuoteHowever, Tory MP Ann Widdecombe insisted, "If you tell young people how to do it, they will do it and end up increasing pregnancies."

Yeah, I'm sure they won't find out otherwise. Maybe we just don't tell them and they'll stay celibate for all time.

@ssmaster

I'm suprised that Widdy commented on this at all. Surely she would of just dismissed it as perposerous and gone home to her mother and her bedroom full of teddies,

MonkeyDrummer

Why don't they just go the whole hog and teach kids that the proper way to have sex is anal. That way the kids will be happy, screwing the arses off each other and by the time they realise what the scam is, they'll be resposible adults, albeit with a very skewed perception of sex.

smoker

"promote alternative forms of loving"

maybe brown love will also be on the syllabus then

hencole

They should cut the genitals of babys before we even get to this stage.

Bogey

It was from my science teacher in year eight that I found out about bumsex.
I remember being very shocked.

PhuckNose

Quote from: "@ssmaster"I'm suprised that Widdy commented on this at all. Surely she would of just dismissed it as perposerous and gone home to her mother and her bedroom full of teddies,

How many teddies has she got?
You got any pictures of her wearing one?

(Funny, didn't think they came in that size...)

mayer

Quote from: "Bogey"It was from my science teacher in year eight that I found out about bumsex.
I remember being very shocked.

i'm not bloody surprised! i hope he got done for it, etc.

Santa's Boyfriend

Quote from: "mayer"
Quote from: "Bogey"It was from my science teacher in year eight that I found out about bumsex.
I remember being very shocked.

i'm not bloody surprised! i hope he got done for it, etc.

He was probably careful enough to explain it within the context of a loving relationship, much like that woman who explained to a group of primary school children what a mars bar party was.

Krang


MonkeyDrummer

is it not when you split everyone into teams, cut mars bars up into one piece per member of team, place the cut up mars bar around 15 feet away and race to eat it.

gazzyk1ns

Quote from: "hencole"They should cut the genitals of babys before we even get to this stage.

Don't be stupid Hencole, they should remove the genitals of the parents before we even get to that stage.

hencole

Quote from: "gazzyk1ns"
Quote from: "hencole"They should cut the genitals of babys before we even get to this stage.

Don't be stupid Hencole, they should remove the genitals of the parents before we even get to that stage.

You're right, this interbreeding between the sexes has got to stop.

Pinball

Sex lessons in schools? That's soooo 1995. Have they not heard of the World Wide Wank? The kids they're "teaching" about oral sex are probably already well versed at degree level in all manner of devient practices, the prurient little scalliwags ;-)

"The Internet interprets censorship as damage, and routes around it"

gazzyk1ns

Yeah Pinball is right, a nervous 38 year-old supply teacher trying to tell them that a blowjob exists is probably going to have a limited effect on people trading CD-Rs of amateur horsesex.

Quote from: "That linked article"According to The Sun, teachers will talk to pupils about 'stopping points' before full sex and promote alternative forms of loving.

Hehe "loving", could there be a more inappropriate word there?

Pinball

"Wear a condom" and "take The Pill" are the two most relevant messages I would have thought, rather than "Don't do it". The latter really won't work, despite visits from US evangelists and their incumbent rings and virgins.

mwude

Quote from: "gazzyk1ns"amateur horsesex.

Does this not imply that 'professional horsesex' also exists?  If so, where do I sign up?  It's got to be one step up from the call centre I'm currently in.

gazzyk1ns

Yeah but it's rubbish, there's a lack of penetration and the horse doesn't look "into" it.

Purple Tentacle

Quote from: "gazzyk1ns"
Quote from: "That linked article"According to The Sun, teachers will talk to pupils about 'stopping points' before full sex and promote alternative forms of loving.
Hehe "loving", could there be a more inappropriate word there?

Oh sweet jesus please stop me laughing, I've got work to do here.

I've just got an image of my old 40 year old grey haired English teacher having to explain that just before you think about shoving it in, it might be better to have a good old wank and a nosh, or perhaps taking it up the Gary.

Bloody hell, just throw condoms at the kids and let them find out for themselves.


Incidentally on the tube last night I found that I was sat next to a used condom for 40 minutes.  If I had leaned over I would have TOUCHED it.
I'm never going to east London again, the people there are dirty people.

smoker

Quote from: "Purple Tentacle"Incidentally on the tube last night I found that I was sat next to a used condom for 40 minutes.  If I had leaned over I would have TOUCHED it.
I'm never going to east London again, the people there are dirty people.

but did it get on in east london or before?

Purple Tentacle

Quote from: "smoker"
Quote from: "Purple Tentacle"Incidentally on the tube last night I found that I was sat next to a used condom for 40 minutes.
but did it get on in east london or before?

Ha, I've now got an image that the condom actually got off the tube BEFORE me, all the sperms propelling it towards some vulnerable Hammersmith womb.

thatmuch

Quote from: "@ssmaster"UK pupils to get lessons in oral sex!
http://www.webindia123.com/news/showdetails.asp?id=37757&cat=World

Which bright spark thought up this idea, this is just a lazy solution to teenage pregnancy problems.

Why? It's exactly what schools should have been doing for years. If kids really appreciate that there's far more to sex and making love than intercourse, and realise that giving pleasure in other ways is just as valid, surely that can only encourage more respectful attitudes to eachother. Better than a five-second fuck and wooosh I've lost my virginity and might be pregnant (if I'm a girl) (I'm getting lost here).

I think teachers should be suggesting - playing around is fine, as long as you know how to say 'no' if you're uncomfortable with anything, but intercourse is best left to when you know what you're doing and really trust someone.

You twenty-somethings seem quite puritanical to me! But then I was never a teenager so what would I know?

@ssmaster

Quote from: "thatmuch"
I think teachers should be suggesting - playing around is fine,

Enter John Cleese a'la Meaning of Life

Smackhead Kangaroo

OH innocence where hast thou gone?


how about "Don't bother doing it, you're knob/tits are too small and you'll be shit"

Morrisfan82

Quote from: "Purple Tentacle"I've just got an image of my old 40 year old grey haired English teacher having to explain that just before you think about shoving it in, it might be better to have a good old wank and a nosh, or perhaps taking it up the Gary.
They should do Sex Ed in Ladybird book format.

New words: wank, nosh, Gary.

Edit: just realised what a fantastic porn star name 'Sex Ed' is.

Smackhead Kangaroo

Quote from: "Muteki"New words: wank, nosh, Gary..... True


Sounds like an English Budwweiser advert.

thomasina

[Mallory from Natural Born Killers] Thats the worst head I ever had in my life! *BANG*[/Mallory]

If it stops the tragic killings of young men who lick the wrong bits, it can't be a bad thing.

thatmuch

Here you are, young puritans!  

ORAL SEX LESSONS TO CUT RATES OF TEENAGE PREGNANCY
By Mark Townsend
The Observer
Sunday, May 9, 2004

http://observer.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,6903,1212734,00.html

Encouraging schoolchildren to experiment with oral sex could prove the most effective
way of curbing teenage pregnancy rates, a government study has found.

Pupils under 16 who were taught to consider other forms of 'intimacy' such as oral sex
were significantly less likely to engage in full intercourse, it was revealed.

Britain's teenage pregnancy rate is the highest in Europe. In 2002 there were 39,286 teen
pregnancies recorded. The government has spent more than #60 million to tackle the
problem but so far failed to halt the rise.

A sex education course developed by Exeter University trains teachers to talk to teenagers
about 'stopping points' before full sex.

Now an unpublished government-backed report reveals that a trial of the course has been a
success. Schoolchildren, particularly girls, who received such training developed a 'more
mature' response to sex.

The study by the National Foundation for Educational Research found youngsters were
'less likely to be sexually active' than peers who received traditional forms of sex
education, dispelling the fears of family campaigners who believe such methods actually
arouse the sexual interest of teenagers.

Now the government will recommend the scheme, called A Pause, to schools throughout
England and Wales following the success of the trial in 104 schools where sexual
intercourse among 16-year-olds fell by up to 20 per cent, according to Dr John Tripp of the
Department of Child Health at the University of Exeter, who helped to design the course.

Teachers who sign up to the course are primed to deal with queries from pupils on all
kinds of sexual experience. Those behind the course stress the scheme does not suggest
teenagers experiment with oral sex. Instead they say A Pause promotes the message that
other forms of physical intimacy are safer than full intercourse.

'It teaches people assertiveness skills and that they should be only as intimate as they feel
comfortable with,' said Tripp.

A Department for Education and Skills spokesman said the report's verdict would be made
available to all schools. 'All teachers respect peer-reviewed material, and this will help
influence their decision,' he said.