Topic: Amusing Wikipedia Stuff [split topic]

[dr_christian_troy]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ian_Fleming

If you want to read about Ian Fleming, at present you will be greeted by some mediocre portrait by a 'local' Greek artist, rather than an actual photograph of the good man:



Not necessarily funny, but it does seem rather odd.

[Mary is not amused]

We should be exposed to more shit art: it makes us appreciate the good stuff all the more.  It works that way for me, at least.

[DJ Solid Snail]

Neck or no neck, I think that's rather good myself.

[dr_christian_troy]

Neck or no neck, I think that's rather good myself.

That's fair enough. I just think it's a bit unusual for that specific painting to represent Fleming on the wiki page, when there's decent photographs like this:

[DJ Solid Snail]

Copyright, innit.

[Kennedy Heroin]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cycling#Equipment

Bikes can also be heavily customized, with different seat designs and handle bars, for example. The British art critic and presenter of the South Bank show, Melvyn Bragg, is a keen cycling enthusiast having customised his stunt racing bike with handle bar tassles, tubeless tires, and even icons of the A team, which appear with a flick of a switch.

[Jemble Fred]

Made my day.

[AsparagusTrevor]

I want to believe the person who wrote that saw that spoof of Vic & Bob's and genuinely believes it's true.

[Small Man Big Horse]

From the message board on Glenda Jackson's imdb page:

Should I become a Fan? Love similar actresses like Vanessa Redgrave 
 
I Love similar actresses like Vanessa Redgrave and other British actresses, like Kate Winslet, Tilda Swinton, Helen Mirren and Emma Thompson.

I like Maggie Smith, respect her but she never really appealed to me like the aforementioned women did. Especially Vanessa, who I absolutely love and adore.

Which other British actresses or American ones or any other nationality are similar to Glenda Jackson.

Never really seen any films with her in them but of course have heard a lot of praise for Glenda in "Stevie" and to a lesser extent "Women in Love".

Of course there is her fiasco with her 2nd Oscar for "A Touch of Class". Interesting, is that she has never personally collected her Oscars, in that she never attended the ceremonies where she won. I personally feel that Joanne Woodward probably should have won in 1973, but having not seen "A Touch of Class" nor the other nominees, I can't really say. Though, I can say, I've seen "the Exorcist" and that film deserve *beep*

So what performances should I check her out in?

I'm thinking, from what I've heard (i.e. her awards), her top 5 are:

1. Women in Love
2. Stevie
3. Elizabeth R (TV)
4. A Touch of Class
5. Sunday Bloody Sunday
6. Hedda
7. Mary, Queen of Scot?

How would you rank her most critical works/performances?

I hear now she's a politician in Britain, well good for her. Vanessa should be one too, but she's too racial (and that is a GOOD thing - that she is radical, not the part that she isn't in politics).

So well appreciate your thoughts.

I also think actresses of the time who are equally good (awards-wise/critics choice wise) include Jane Fonda, Sissy Spacek, Faye Dunaway, Liv Ullmann, etc.

I know it's not laugh out loud material, but it just struck me as really bizarre. Why would someone ask if they should be a fan or not, and instead just watch her films and see if they like her? Alas no one has replied yet, so I guess we'll never know her decision.

[Pseudopath]

This wonderfully evocative synopsis of the Warren G/Nate Dogg song 'Regulate' made me guffaw:

On a cool, clear night (typical to Southern California) Warren G travels through his neighborhood, searching for women with whom he might initiate sexual intercourse. He has chosen to engage in this pursuit alone.

Nate Dogg, having just arrived in Long Beach, seeks Warren. On his way to find Warren, Nate passes a car full of women who are excited to see him. Regardless, he insists to the women that there is no cause for excitement.

Warren makes a left turn at 21st Street and Lewis Ave, where he sees a group of young men enjoying a game of dice together. He parks his car and greets them. He is excited to find people to play with, but to his chagrin, he discovers they intend to relieve him of his material possessions. Once the hopeful robbers reveal their firearms, Warren realizes he is in a less than favorable predicament.

Meanwhile, Nate passes the women, as they are low on his list of priorities. His primary concern is locating Warren. After curtly casting away the strumpets (whose interest in Nate was such that they crashed their automobile), he serendipitously stumbles upon his friend, Warren G, being held up by the young miscreants.

Warren, unaware that Nate is surreptitiously observing the scene unfold, is in disbelief that he's being robbed. The perpetrators have taken jewelry and a name brand designer watch from Warren, who is so incredulous that he asks what else the robbers intend to steal. This is most likely a rhetorical question.

Observing these unfortunate proceedings, Nate realizes that he may have to use his firearm to deliver his friend from harm.

The tension crescendos as the robbers point their guns to Warren's head. Warren senses the gravity of his situation. He cannot believe the events unfolding could happen in his own neighborhood. As he imagines himself in a fantastical escape, he catches a glimpse of his friend, Nate.

Nate has seventeen cartridges to expend (sixteen residing in the pistol's magazine, with a solitary round placed in the chamber and ready to be fired) on the group of robbers, and he uses many of them. Afterward, he generously shares the credit for neutralizing the situation with Warren, though it is clear that Nate did all of the difficult work. Putting congratulations aside, Nate quickly reminds himself that he has committed multiple homicides to save Warren before letting his friend know that there are females nearby if he wishes to fornicate with them.

Warren recalls that it was the promise of copulation that coaxed him away from his previous activities, and is thankful that Nate knows a way to satisfy these urges.

Nate quickly finds the women who earlier crashed their car on Nate's account. He remarks to one that he is fond of her physical appeal. The woman, impressed by Nate's singing ability, asks that he and Warren allow her and her friends to share transportation. Soon, both friends are driving with automobiles full of women to the East Side Motel, presumably to consummate their flirtation in an orgy.

The third verse is more expository, with Warren and Nate explaining their G Funk musical style. Nate displays his bravado by claiming that individuals with equivalent knowledge could not even attempt to approach his level of lyrical mastery. He also notes that if any third party smokes as he does, they would find themselves in a state of intoxication daily (from Nate's other works, it can be inferred that the substance referenced is marijuana). Nate concludes his delineation of the night by issuing a vague threat to "busters," suggesting that he and Warren will further "regulate" any potential incidents in the future (presumably by engaging their enemies with small arms fire).

[quadraspazzed]

Haha! That's excellent.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

no mischief here, just amusement:

In June 2008, a news site run by the American Family Association censored an Associated Press article on sprinter Tyson Gay, replacing instances of "gay" with homosexual, thus rendering his name as "Tyson Homosexual"

[JesusAndYourBush]

Haha! That's excellent.

Indeed, it's very well written.

[Uncle TechTip]

Did anyone get down to the Wanky Balls festival the other week?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/mediamonkeyblog/2010/aug/10/the-independent-big-chill

[Hank_Kingsley]

From the Wikipedia page for 'Laffy Taffy'

The name refers to both the texture of the taffy as well as its embodiment of silliness; the outside of each wrapper has at least one joke. For example: "What do you call a cow with no legs? -- Ground Beef." Some jokes are pun-based, such as "What is Labor Day? -- That's when mommies have their babies." Other jokes are based on silly word play, such as "What's an owl's favorite subject? -- Owlgebra." Others have an overt conservative agenda, such as "Why are you still alive? -- Your parents decided to not have an abortion." These jokes are usually sent in by children who are credited on the wrapper. Laffy Taffy used to come in thick, square shaped pieces, but today, it is sold in thinner, rectangular shaped pieces. The taffy is also made with artificial flavoring.

[Guy]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paula_Radcliffe

At the 2005 London Marathon she won with a time of 2:17:42, a world's best time for a women's only race by over a minute. The race however is remembered more for a notorious moment towards the end when Radcliffe, feeling hindered by bowel discomfort and in need for a toilet break, stopped and defecated on the side of the road in view of the crowd and TV cameras which broadcast the incident live^[24]. After the race she apologised to viewers and explained what happened, "I was losing time because I was having stomach cramps and I thought 'I just need to go and I'll be fine'. I didn’t really want to resort to that in front of hundreds of thousands of people.^[25] Basically I needed to go. I started feeling it between 15 and 16 miles (26 km) and probably carried on too long before stopping. I must have eaten too much beforehand". In November 2006, the incident was voted top running moment in history in the UK from a choice of ten 'unforgettable moments' ^[3].

It's funny because it's not even vandalism.

[NoSleep]

Has this come the attention of the forum before now?

The character was called 'The Dealer' in pre-publicity for the show; evidently, the name was changed before recording started (though this may have simply been a mistake as 'Banker' or the local equivalent is used in most other international versions of the show). Channel 4's website referred to him as such though on their listings page until 12 April when after a number of complaints, including an organised campaign by posters to the forum of the website Cook'd and Bomb'd, the text was changed to say The Banker. Though during episode 1,002 Noel Edmonds revealed that there was a new banker named 'Jeff'.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Banker_%28Deal_or_No_Deal_UK%29

[Ambient Sheep]

Has this come the attention of the forum before now?

I'm afraid it has!  It's true as well, if you read through the thread...

[Depressed Beyond Tables]

Mops.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mop

The mop is also good at cleaning small and tight areas and can help a person really clean their house.

It's all true, just the word "really" is perhaps unnecessarily enthusiastic.

[AsparagusTrevor]

Maybe they mean 'really' as opposed to that fake clean you get from pretending to use a mop.

[Depressed Beyond Tables]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeff_Baxter?oldid=0

Jeff "Skunk" Baxter, as known from his work as a guitarist with Steely dan and The Doobie Brothers, amongst others:

"We thought turntables were for playing records until rappers began to use them as instruments, and we thought airplanes were for carrying passengers until terrorists realized they could be used as missiles,"[1]  Baxter has said. "My big thing is to look at existing technologies and try to see other ways they can be used, which happens in music all the time and happens to be what terrorists are incredibly good at."

In April 2005, he joined the NASA Exploration Systems Advisory Committee (ESAC).

An amazing change of career. What a musician, though.

[The Duck Man]

From the Charlotte Jackson's article. She is presently looking rather magnificent in the shockingly bad new Sky show "Take It Like a Fan".

Her family originate from Spain and Liverpool, and she is resultantly a lifelong Liverpool fan.

[Phil_A]

From the John Barnes page, now sadly removed.

Teams managed by Barnes are taught to either hold or give the ball, though crucially they must do it at the right time. When in attack, Barnes' sides attempt to get the ball to the line at a variety of speeds ranging from slow to fast. In team talks Barnes always warns his players to be wary of the opposition's attempts to hit them and hurt them in both defence and attack. One criticism levelled at sides managed by Barnes is that one way they beat their opposition is as a result of getting around the back. John Barnes, although born in Jamaica, is a self proclaimed England man, and he refers to his tactical strategy as "the masterplan". Barnes is noted for his opposition to both hooliganism and football songs, and also for his firm belief that, with the crest of the club on their chests, his players cannot go wrong.

Also, this was formerly the illustration for David Dickinson's entry:

[Famous Mortimer]

That Barnes thing is a lovely bit of outsider comedy, like 3 Wolf Moon / Paul Ross print / Peter Andre and Jordan reviews on Amazon.

[Utter Shit]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Danny_Dyer's_Deadliest_Men

Concise.

[boki]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Danny_Dyer's_Deadliest_Men

Concise.

For posterity:

Danny Dyer meets men he considers deadly.

[NoSleep]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ian_Fleming

If you want to read about Ian Fleming, at present you will be greeted by some mediocre portrait by a 'local' Greek artist, rather than an actual photograph of the good man:



Not necessarily funny, but it does seem rather odd.

[Utter Shit]

This isn't Wikipedia but I think it's worth posting. From the information on a torrent I downloaded of Travis' "The Man Who"...

Track 10 (Slide Show) was originally 10.31mins of which 3.15mins in the middle of the track was silence. I have edited this out, but if you still wish to listen to the 3.15min of silence simply turn the music off for 3.15mins.

[confettiinmyhair]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimmy_McMillan

already a ludicrous meme.

[Retinend]

Sean Kingston - Beautiful Girls

The song is about a boy who is suicidal over the failure of his relationship with a "beautiful girl".