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Amusing Wikipedia Stuff [split topic]

Started by dr_christian_troy, July 25, 2010, 11:46:13 AM

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paint

From the Wikipedia page for Ken Loach's My Name is Joe
QuoteHe exits his van and asks the woman if she lost her guide dog. Owing to the accent, many American and Canadian audiences think that Joe is speaking about a 'gay dog.'

From the Wikipedia page for Misotheism
QuoteIn Numbers 31:17-18 Moses demands that all men, women, and children captives are to be killed "but all the women children, who have never known a man by lying with him,keep alive for yourself". Yahweh doesn't speak out against the massive child rape.

Blue Jam

Reading about the Oasis split just now I stumbled upon this on the page for Paul "Bonehead" Arthurs:

QuoteArthurs left school in 1981 and worked as a plasterer. He started his first band in 1984 - called Pleasure and Pain. Around this time he began a relationship with Kate, whom he would later marry. In the late 1980s, while working as a building contractor, he started a band with his friends, Paul "Guigsy" McGuigan (bass), Tony McCaroll (drums) and Chris Hutton (vocals). They called themselves 'The Rain', after The Beatles' B-side, "Rain". He has an extremely young daughter called Lucy, who enjoys bingo and snakes and ladders.

It's the "extremely" which tickled me. I also like the way the picture on Guigsy's page looks like it's from an appeal for someone wanted for murder.

Steven

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Shoe_People

Quote
Legacy

Scientists that cloned dolly the sheep used to watch the shoe people on their lunch break.
Andrew Wiles was working on proving Fermat's Last Theorem. He got really stuck and spent weeks and weeks on a part of it and he got no where. He considered giving up but whilst watching the Shoe People the solution suddenly came to him.
The Galileo probe that orbited Jupiter studying the planet was powered by three televisions playing the shoe people.
The first email ever sent was about the shoe people. It read "It's Trampy's birthday."
The Soviet Union fell because they wanted to watch the shoe people and the west wouldn't let them.

The worst thing is I didn't bat an eye until I got to the third one down, or why I'd be looking at the wiki page for The Shoe People, a show which I have no real fondness for (except for the super theme tune) via a series of laterally followed hyperlinks at two in the morning.

Phil_A

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pulp_%28band%29

QuoteIt was at this time that Cocker gained significant media exposure due to an notorious prank at the 1996 BRIT Awards, where he invaded the stage in protest during pop singer Michael Jackson's performance of "Earth Song" and "wiggled his backside" at the audience. After complaints by Jackson and his entourage, Cocker spent the night in police cells accused of assaulting the child performers. However, with British comedian and former solicitor Bob Mortimer acting as legal representation, he was released without charge


Jemble Fred

Surely that's common knowledge? It was widely reported at the time, often crops up in interviews etc.

I'm not sure it's 100% true though, I seem to recall Bob offering hs services, but it never actually came to that.

Phil_A

I've honestly I've never heard that before, not at the time or since.

I just love the idea of Bob being Jarvis's lawyer, it sounds like the greatest comedy sketch never written.

momatt

Don't really prove anything, but just a good time to say that my mate's a barrister in Birmingham, who regularly works with Bob's brother.  The brother is also a lawyer and is really funny and a good bloke apparently.

Papercut

I seem to remember Bob M at the time saying he spoke to police, or maybe security, in order to diffuse the situation. Presumably he pointed out that legally there was nothing to answer for.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bill_Steer

Bill Steer (born William Geoffrey Steer) (born 3 December 1969 in Reynoldston Avenue, Stockton-on-Tees, England) is an English guitar player, and a founder of British Metal band Carcass. He often frequented the Sheraton to play snooker, forming his first band there, and bought bread regularly from the Co-op on Redhill Road. During summers, he was usually found on the assault course at Ki-ora hall.

dr_christian_troy

For a brief moment, both Prince William's and Kate Middleton's wiki page had something about them both being Christians who support rights for fathers, placed immediately after their names at the top of the page.

They went so quickly I didn't have time to copy it.


Old Thrashbarg

Quote from: http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Prince_William_of_Wales&oldid=397093005Prince William Arthur Philip Louis of Wales, is a Christian who supports British fathers and their right to see their own children after a seperation, calling it evil for any country to not allow its own men a basic freedom to see their own chidlren unless they pay legal fees after a divorce / seperation. Kate wants all English children of seperated parents to be reunited with their fathers as an act of basic humanity

Quote from: http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Kate_Middleton&oldid=397092858Catherine Elizabeth "Kate" Middleton is a Christian who supports British fathers and their right to see their own children after a seperation, calling it evil for any country to not allow its own men a basic freedom to see their own chidlren unless they pay legal fees after a divorce / seperation. Kate wants all English children of seperated parents to be reunited with their fathers as an act of basic humanity.

dr_christian_troy


Small Man Big Horse

Not Wikipedia, nor funny, but Empire's review of Adrift made me do a double take...

QuoteVincent Cassel proves his lnguistic versatility in this Portuguese-language drama with a bit of French thrown in. While away with his Brazilian wife and kids, Mathias (Cassel) has an affair, causing his 14 year-old, Filipa (Laura Neiva), to doubt his loyalty. Torn between disgust and fascination, Filipa spies on him and toys with the affections of a boy her own age. It's a stylish coming-of-age drama exploring the complexities of marriage, fidelity and sexuality through the eyes of a girl only just discovering the power of her exceptional beauty. Using her POV has its disadvantages — until the end, we can only guess the adults' motivations. But Neiva is a real find, if disconcertingly sexual: it's a relief to hear the Brazilian age of consent is 14.

I'm almost tempted to write a fake outraged email to Empire...

Ambient Sheep



"Is it wrong to fancy this 14-year-old girl now she's...er...in Brazil?"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dustin_Diamond

Former saved by the bell Screech, Dustin Diamonds' entry is a goldmine of the ridiculously sublime.

QuoteIn 2001, Diamond released the video Dustin Diamond Teaches Chess, in which he shows various techniques for becoming a better chess player. It is punctuated by appearances by Diamond, in various costumes, such as dressing as Screech, Liberace and Al Jolson-style black face.

QuoteIn 2003, Diamond attempted to take control of the domain dustindiamond.com, which was owned by Max Goldberg, the creator of YTMND. Diamond was upset because the site is laid out to look extremely amateurish and incompetently prepared, for example with many spelling mistakes, contains gay fantasies relating to Diamond and links to porn websites.

In 2004, the case was submitted to the National Arbitration Forum acting on behalf of the Internet Corporation for Assigned Names and Numbers (ICANN). Goldberg, then 21, represented himself through the suit, which Diamond ultimately lost. The decision read, in part:

    "The Panel accepts Respondent's argument that the "outrageous ugly and low-tech graphics and numerous errors and misspellings" as well as the sheer absurdity of the site's claim that Dustin Diamond is a "Famous Superstar and Sex Symbol", clearly signal that the site is not meant to be taken seriously


Famous Mortimer

I was going to go back to dustindiamond.com for a chuckle, but it's been taken down! Motherfuckers!

Ambient Sheep

Sounds like an absurd judgement though: regardless of the fact that it may (or may not) obviously be a parody site, surely a well-known-ish actor like Dustin Diamond should be able to own www.dustindiamond.com?!?  I thought that kind of cybersquatting had become inadmissable years ago...

Wilbur

Quote from: Ambient Sheep on November 28, 2010, 06:06:36 PM
Sounds like an absurd judgement though: regardless of the fact that it may (or may not) obviously be a parody site, surely a well-known-ish actor like Dustin Diamond should be able to own www.dustindiamond.com?!?  I thought that kind of cybersquatting had become inadmissable years ago...

If you lose a .com it is a nightmare getting it back. Involves ICANN ansd hundreds of thousands. If you have a .com dont forget to renew it.


Shoulders?-Stomach!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Haslinger

Quotei steal a whole bunch of crap from other bands, then add my own computer-generated music. im a total fake, and everybody should know

Paul Haslinger (born 11 December 1962) is an Austrian-born composer and musician currently based in Los Angeles, California.


The Duck Man

From the article for Sam Vokes, the Wolves player:

QuoteOn 5 August 2010 Vokes signed on loan for English Championship side Bristol City [...] Bristol City Manager Steve Coppell said "Sam's been a player that has always been a thorn in the side of my old team Reading over the years"[11] which was an odd thing to say as he has only played against Reading twice in his entire career, appearing as a substitute both times and only featured for 6 minutes in one of them. Reading won both games without conceding a goal.

dredd

QuoteThe band King Missile has a song called 'Cheesecake Truck'. The song lasts for just over one minute, but the word 'cheesecake' is mentioned fourteen times. The song's protagonist claims to eat large numbers of cheesecakes during the first day of his job driving a cheesecake truck.

The Duck Man

Tamzin Outhwaite's article has its own trivia section, which reads:
QuoteOuthwaite is one of the very few English names that use all five vowels.

buttgammon

I love the shit pictures of food on there. The ones with strange and/or crap garnishes are the best.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/e9/Bacon_and_egg_sandwich_-_open_face.JPG

Oh, and from 'Builder's Tea':

QuoteIt is not unusual for builder to put over 100 spoons of sugar in each cup of tea.

gmoney

OK, that caught me off guard. A genuine belly laugh.

samadriel

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sideburns
QuoteIn 1936 President Roosevelt's brief experiment with sideburns, grown on a yachting cruise, provoked only laughter.

I've got this mental image of Roosevelt bursting triumphantly into the Tehran Conference sporting a bristling pair of cheek-warmers: "Whaddaya think, guys?!"  Churchill and Stalin greet him with scornful laughter, and he trundles shamefaced into the gents' with an electric razor.

(Yes, I know that was the '40s...)

jutl

QuoteGropecunt, the earliest known use of which is in about 1230, appears to have been derived as a compound of the words grope and cunt.

from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gropecunt_Lane

Retinend



Leggy Zutons saxophonist Abi Harding

QuoteOriginally a four-piece, Sean's girlfriend Abi Harding began joining The Zutons on stage for a couple of songs mid-set, playing simple saxophone lines. She was very popular with the crowd. The other band members liked the way her saxophone enhanced their sound. Abi became a full member, contributing vocals and sex.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Zutons

Also:
QuoteRelated searches: abi harding bikini abi harding legs abi harding wallpaper abi harding hot abi harding feet
http://www.google.co.uk/images?q=Abi+Harding&um=1&hl=en&ie=UTF-8&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&biw=1280&bih=685

mjki5gs2

This tickled me recently:
QuoteAmbrose was a man of few words, refusing countless interview requests with the motto "Curtly talk to no man."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Curtly_Ambrose

Gonna have to use a Stylish script to get rid of that smug wanker Jimmy Wales peering at me all the time. Especially as his photo is right over the names of people, it makes everyone look like a smug wanker.