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Facebook The Third [split topic]

Started by Small Man Big Horse, July 19, 2010, 11:07:55 PM

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Small Man Big Horse

This just appeared on my feed:



Now the facts are these: This could be the greatest home video ever made. Said girl is extremely attractive.

Your mission: To find a way that I can ask for a copy of the sex tape which won't make me sound urgh and creepy. And will be successful too, obviously.

El Unicornio, mang

I think you need to track down her parent's neighbours. My guess is that the old man has made himself a copy and will give you one if you promise not to tell the police.

Still Not George

I just played Mafia Wars for the first time. Why the fuck do so many people play this shite?

At least FrontierVille seems to have something to actually interact with, rather than just clicking a button...

Koant

There's also the fun progresswars.com and Cow Clickers.
(links don't require facebooks)
Quote from: Cow Clicker
You get a cow. You can click on it. In six hours, you can click it again. Clicking earns you clicks.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

I need your assistance to rebuke an unpleasant racist twat in a witty way.

It all started when my brother declared he was happy with our medals in the European Championships...

Quote*** Anderton proud of our British athletes - only disappointment was the men's 1500m....bad tactics....14 hours ago · LikeUnlike

***** Hussey Which 'British' athletes would THAT be ?????

***** Hussey No answer to that one then ?????

Shoulders the ones born in Britain that won the gold medals i suppose

***** Hussey And I suppose if a dog is born in a stable,it becomes a horse then ????

LeanneChapman to be a horse u need long legs, big teeth, a saddle, maybe a name like Red Rum etc etc, look abit silly on a dog called benji, not to mention the freaky transformation and scientific limitations, however, to be english it just requires been english and not russian for instance, not that confusing really..

Currently I'm stuck on 'will you shut the fuck up you tedious cunt', which isn't really doing anything.

chand

If a dog is born in Britain, it's a British dog.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Mmmmyeah, do I want to refer to non-whites as 'dogs' simply to entertain his analogy?

The best I've got so far is "I think you've confused animal species (biology) with the human idea of nationality (notional construct)." A bit too smartypants, perhaps.

What makes this difficult is, I've got to avoid being rude to him because he's a work colleague of my brother's, but I also want to thoroughly humiliate him. Some of the stuff he comes out with is hateful, hateful shit.

Treguard of Dunshelm

Remind him that, as the product of generations of immigration and invasion, pretty much every british person is a dog born in a stable anyway?

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote from: Treguard of Dunshelm on July 31, 2010, 03:27:46 PM
Remind him that, as the product of generations of immigration and invasion, pretty much every british person is a dog born in a stable anyway?

That can be my boring reserve argument, but it should be so stultifyingly obvious to him anyway. That it isn't suggests he's a truly unpleasant character and that makes me want to trounce him.

MALCOLM

You could also consider deleting your account from that horrific cunt parade

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote from: MALCOLM on July 31, 2010, 06:03:49 PM
You could also consider deleting your account from that horrific cunt parade

Yeah, not going to leave facebook obviously due to the fact I speak to lots of people I like on there regularly and it's the best way of staying in touch with friends living far away and more distant relations. But thanks.

MALCOLM

I manage to do all those things really well too and have never had to hear the rants of Nazi McRacist.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote from: MALCOLM on July 31, 2010, 07:02:09 PM
I manage to do all those things really well too and have never had to hear the rants of Nazi McRacist.

Lucky for you that your brother doesn't happen to work with a racist.

Yes, yes, I know, 'why did he add him?' But even so. These people exist and we shouldn't ignore them but let it be known that their views are abhorrent.

Talulah, really!

"Our Lord Jesus was born in a stable but that didn't make him a donkey. You Sir, may have been born in a hospital but you grew up to be an Ass."

purlieu

"No, it's a dog. Of course, if its owners believe it should be pure bred and kept away from other dog races it'd probably go blind and stupid and mistake 'British' for 'white' as well".

purlieu

Or "No, but neither is a black man born in Stockport an English Springer Spaniel"

purlieu

Or "No, but a Labrador and an Alsatian born in a stable still come from the same stable"

purlieu

Or "No, but the horse and dog would still be from the same stable"

Or something.  I think that might be the most ridiculous, ignorant argument I've ever heard.  I am annoyed and will continue to be until I find a way to punch this man with words.

Desi Rascal

Quote from: Talulah, really! on July 31, 2010, 08:33:02 PM
"Our Lord Jesus was born in a stable but that didn't make him a donkey. You Sir, may have been born in a hospital but you grew up to be an Ass."

  Keep imagine that being spoken by WC Fields, beautifully put.

El Unicornio, mang

It's a Bernard Manning "joke", can't find the clip where he says it but it was quoted a lot in his obits.  What Manning is getting at with the joke is clearly racist, but taken literally (that being born somewhere doesn't necessarily make you that nationality) has truth to it. For instance, Cliff Richard was born in India, but is considered English, Jerry Sadowitz was born in the US, but is Scottish, etc. Also, you can never have set foot somewhere but still consider yourself that nationality (as a lot of Americans consider themselves Irish or Italian).

Just remember that his singular viewpoint, driven by hate, fear and anxiety, means his opportunities for peace and joy are now forever shrinking. No matter the transient gratification in his life, no matter how secure he feels in his beliefs, no matter the intermittent 'victories' his perception brings him, the tension between his own mindset and the reality he's forced to inhabit will never let him rest.

I know you want to hurt him, you want him to say 'you're right, I'm an idiot', you want to cause him equal or greater suffering than his own hatred has caused you. Everyone knows that feeling. If you do, though, it's like punching a punch. And that wrecks. Ask your brother to delete the guy if he can't take responsibility for himself in public.

Spoiler alert
Of course, the only way to move forward, for both of you, is to arrange for several black men dressed in tribal garb to gang-rape his mother until she comes, post the video link on his Facebook page and press 'Like'.
[close]

Desi Rascal

 Boston thats how Mel Gison started, and look how thats all turned out!

Shoulders?-Stomach!

QuoteJust remember that his singular viewpoint, driven by hate, fear and anxiety, means his opportunities for peace and joy are now forever shrinking.

And he lives in Hull.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

...oh god. The conversation has 'moved on'


Quote****** Hussey No,it's NOT confusing at all - but you knew exactly what I was getting at !!!!!

****** Chapman i also know what thai bride is, doesn't mean i need one.

****** Hussey Funny you should say that,there were quite a few short,fat old men with their Ting Tongs around town yesterday ! - no,definitely don't go along with the inter-racial marriage thing either !!!

****** Chapman oooh god no, lets keep the whites to the whites, indians to the indians and chinese to the chinese and party like its 1899 !! ha ha

****** Hussey Absolututely - you've saved me the effort of writing it !!! lol

Leanne Chapman hmmmm.

chand

Quoteshort,fat old men with their Ting Tongs

Ah, Lucas and Walliams, I hope you're fucking happy.

Custard

Quotelets keep the whites to the whites, indians to the indians and chinese to the chinese

I love the way that that whittles the world's population down into 3 handy, easy to remember catagories.

hoverdonkey

To be fair, I don't think she should be expected to name every race of people on the earth to make her point. She's not the problem here (she's being sarcastic, right?)

Custard

Oh i know, but it did make me laugh. It's something a primary-school kid would say.

rudi

Let's keep the girls to the girls. Then film it.

alan nagsworth

Tell him to cunt the fuck off.

SAY IT