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"Sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your name..."

Started by 23 Daves, November 13, 2010, 03:21:49 PM

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23 Daves

As a child-bordering-on-teen, it was my weekly Friday night treat to be allowed to stay up and watch "Cheers". How this routine established itself, and how "Cheers" became a staple part of it, I'm none too sure. The fact that each series seemed to run for something like 22 episodes and they always repeated it doubtless gave the impression that it was a regular weekly event. So I'd sit with some crisps or peanuts and a glass of pop (Ginger Beer, I'll warrant) and watch as Norm, Sam, Cliff and the boys wisecracked their way through another evening in the Boston bar.

And I swear "Cheers" warped my view of the world and my idea of what Friday nights outside on the adult planet were like. I grew up genuinely believing that as soon as I was old enough, I too would venture into the world of pubs and bars and meet regulars who would joke, jostle and share their worries. Some members of my family probably did a lot to cement this idea by feeding me exaggerated stories about their own local drinkeries. The trouble is, it's not like that. Pubs are frequently just pubs, not extensions of your own friendship circle. The good old boys on their barstools have never greeted me enthusiastically as I've entered any pub, and I've never actually chatted to a psychiatrist whilst sitting in one.

The closest I ever came to frequenting a pub on a par with "Cheers" was during the years 1994-1995 in Portsmouth, when I was a regular at "The Old Vic". "The Old Vic" was something of a knackered little institution when we found it, but that's precisely why we loved it - the upstairs room looked as if it hadn't been decorated since 1975, having mosaic mirror tiles all over the walls, a mirror ball hanging from the ceiling, lots of twinkling lights, and a bar area straight out of some bachelor pad fantasy from the same decade. They had The Fall and Pulp on the jukebox downstairs, and a jovial landlord who genuinely did seem interested in everyone who frequented his establishment - and that enthusiasm was infectious. A close friend of mine puts his heavy drinking during that same period down to the pub itself. He said that he had never experienced a place in his life where his drink would be poured for him as soon as he walked in through the door, no questions asked, nor somewhere where he would be greeted jovially by the bar staff. And once, when one of my other friends was having a relationship crisis, one of the middle aged barstool proppers patted the unfortunate young man on the back as he walked past, adding that he hoped everything was OK. True, it was none of his business strictly speaking, but it was a well-meaning gesture - infinitely preferable to the ghoulish fascination most bar-room acquaintances seem to have about couples arguing.

Sadly, it couldn't last, and it didn't. As wise as the landlord appeared to be, he eventually decided to spruce the place up, and turned the retro-fag-end mess of the upstairs room into an oak pannelled nightmare. It ended up looking like every other modernised pub in the area, and he'd eradicated the very thing that had attracted us there in the first place. Not long after that the ownership changed hands and it became a gay bar - this wouldn't have been a problem, but some of the homophobic locals began hassling the clientele, leading to a bunker mentality amongst the new gay regulars. We weren't actually ever asked to leave the place, but after we seemed to spend half our lives trying to get served at the bar one evening, we all got the message and never returned. And anyway, the Fall certainly weren't on the jukebox anymore, and the pub had changed in all but name.

Ever since then, I've drifted from pub to pub. Some have been considerably better than others, but I've never felt the same sense of loyalty or belonging. It seems to me that finding a bar that becomes an extension of your lounge, filled with characters you're genuinely pleased to see, is a rare thing indeed, harder even than finding a really good restaurant (or, dare I say it, a long-term partner). The factors in what makes a pub work are so variable that it only takes one slight change to tilt the whole establishment out of your favour, whether that involves getting rid of your favourite records from the jukebox, or suddenly deciding to screen sport on the television 24/7. Looking back, I think my friend may have been right - a period of heavy drinking while the goodness of "The Old Vic" lasted probably would have been a fantastic idea.

So, to cut to the main question... Do any of you lot have - or have you ever had - a bar you love and feel completely loyal to?

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Some landlords really are clueless.

QuoteThe good old boys on their barstools have never greeted me enthusiastically as I've entered any pub, and I've never actually chatted to a psychiatrist whilst sitting in one.

It can depend. I literally saw that happen in New York when some guys entered this basement bar we were in, and their mates were already gathered at one side of the bar. Plus, I always thought in 'Cheers' it never seemed to be busy enough. Any busy bustling place will clearly not be as personally friendly, though busy places where you don't know anyone can be more inviting somehow.

We've got a pub just down the road and enjoyed weekly lock-ins and games of pool, singalongs etc, and it feels like a proper community pub with a nice mixture of locals, musicians, students and activity types (a group of cavers seems to come in once or twice a week). It also does a full range of quizzes, open mic nights, footy, good beer, good jukebox. It's got everything really. It wouldn't say it's anything like Cheers though. For a start, not everyone knows my name.


Big Jack McBastard

I remember the same distinct warpage of mind that Cheers may have generated with regards pubs and the like.

In real life I can't honestly think of one I've been in (with maybe the exception of the odd hotel bar and maybe my local in Uni) that hasn't been a soulless... (trying to think of the word) 'blank' place if visited alone. Not only do the people not know my name, they wouldn't give a fuck if I came.

My student Uni bar was just crap, no decent music, no light or warmth and a fug of whining and fret about assignments and papers not done permeated the atmosphere. It was one of the few places that made me want to drink less/more quickly just to be out of there.

I unwittingly visited a gay pub for a while in the afternoons a few years ago (one doesn't like to say 'frequented', lest the wrong idea be conveyed) it was just a quiet, warm, somewhere, wherein I read my Private Eye and had a jar or two. No-one tried to diddle my anus and there were no dildos on the walls, how was I supposed to know?

The fourth toilet with the funny sign perhaps.....

Shoulders?-Stomach!

QuoteI can't honestly think of one I've been in (with maybe the exception of the odd hotel bar and maybe my local in Uni) that hasn't been a soulless... (trying to think of the word) 'blank' place if visited alone.

Don't put yourself down!

I think Cheers tells us that to frequent a bar and get the most out of it, you need to make an effort to get to know the staff and the regulars. And hope that they aren't a bunch of wankers.

'Sometimes you wanna go where everybody's a bunch of wankers'

El Unicornio, mang

It's definitely truer of American bars. I've been to many places where regulars walk in and are are greeted enthusiastically by others sitting at the bar, and the bar staff. And whenever I sit at the bar here (as opposed to at a table) other people around the bar will chat, or the barman/barmaid will engage me in conversation. There is a local pub near my place in England that has a bit of a Cheers vibe, it's always full of old people with dogs though so not really a good place for "young" people like myself.

Depressed Beyond Tables

Bar staff in America are so much more likely to elicit a conversation from you as their wage is also dependant on tips. This means you can strike up a frothy meaningless dirge between barstaff and customers much more frequently, and it is expected in many places.

Bar staff this side are far more reserved and conscious of not cramping the alchoholic's style.

So from this we can reason exactly why America has produced "Cheers" and over here there are endless streams of shows like "Britain's Worst Pubs", "Young, Wasted and Up For A Fight" and ones where they follow a group of guys and girls around to see who'll be first to poison themselves on Fatfrogs or get tapped behind a skip.


23 Daves

I suppose I could also add that I don't think it's a coincidence that my all-time favourite pub was based not in London, but in a slightly run-down town (with official city status, maybe, but Portsmouth is still just the size of a large town).  For all London's claims to be the place where everything happens - which aren't untrue - pubs around here don't often appear to have a regular clientele on the whole.  There isn't that degree of community spirit.   

There are apparently exceptions, though.  A Walthamstow local once told me that if I really wanted to experience a proper friendly local pub, I should go to "The Bell".  I reported there with my wife and a friend expecting some pleasant banter, but the three massive blokes at the bar seemed to take exception to the fact that I was wearing glasses in their favoured establishment ("Fuck off away from the bar, Joe 90!").  Silly me for not wearing contacts that night, eh?  Wife, friend and I nursed our pints nervously in the corner whilst the three shaven-headed men play-fought with each other and screamed like over-grown toddlers, then we fled the fuck out of the place.  It could have been an off-night, but the cracked windows suggested otherwise.  Anyway, I've never been back, even though I live yards from the place. 

I'll give the pub some credit, though - everyone there did seem to know each other. 

purlieu

If you're confident enough, or live in a small enough place, it happens.  The Brudenell Social Club in Leeds, home to all the local boozers around the Hyde Park area and a considerable number of students - especially those coming and going for the gigs the place is known for - became my local for a while.  A good friend of mine and I used to meet up a couple of evenings a week, and he'd know the bar staff to chat to and lots of the locals, not to mention a number of students.  It felt like a proper 'local'.
When I'm stopping with my parents we frequent a pub in the village my dad grew up in, and always get a greeting from half of the customers and the bar staff, who all know my parents' names, and after going for a few weeks everybody seemed to know me too.  It's a lovely feeling and in some ways I'm sad I don't live there as I'd love it to be my proper local.

Kishi the Bad Lampshade

I think it's probably quite common in smaller places. My dad knew all the regulars and landlord at our local, though that might be more to with the fact that he only left to bathe and buy dodgy computer software

vrailaine

There used to be a few pubs back home which were basically funded by their few alcoholic bachelors of a certain age that were kinda like that, most them have closed after these old guys passed their expiration dates.

Feralkid

Quote from: 23 Daves on November 13, 2010, 05:30:35 PM

There are apparently exceptions, though.  A Walthamstow local once told me that if I really wanted to experience a proper friendly local pub, I should go to "The Bell".  I reported there with my wife and a friend expecting some pleasant banter, but the three massive blokes at the bar seemed to take exception to the fact that I was wearing glasses in their favoured establishment ("Fuck off away from the bar, Joe 90!").  Silly me for not wearing contacts that night, eh?  Wife, friend and I nursed our pints nervously in the corner whilst the three shaven-headed men play-fought with each other and screamed like over-grown toddlers, then we fled the fuck out of the place.  It could have been an off-night, but the cracked windows suggested otherwise.  Anyway, I've never been back, even though I live yards from the place. 

I'll give the pub some credit, though - everyone there did seem to know each other.

I used to pass that pub all the time when I loved in E17, never had the nerve to go inside.  It looked sorta cozy though.  Being from Northern Ireland I'm extraordinarily wary about going to any pub that's not in the centre of town - lots of lil neighbourhood boozers here seem to be a little too sectarian to drop in on randomly.  But yes, I wish real world pubs were like Cheers.

phes

There have been many years when i've known most of the bar staff and locals in my local pub (also Portsmouth). Many of them were racist and/or brain damaged from the drinking, but they did know my name and would all greet me when I walked into the bar. This is probably because 70% of the pub is just one long bar, which forces most of the drinkers to actually turn around and look at who has walked through the door. It's owned by psy-trancey, bongo-ey druids now and although it's been my local through thick and thin, and believe me it's been thin, this is probably my least favourite of all the phases.

'Double brandy please'
'House?'
'No, do you have anything else?'
'No'
'Double Jack Daniels then please'
'Sorry we don't have any'
'Double vodka and diet coke then please'
'House?'
'......yes'
'Sorry, we don't have any diet coke'

*pours drink into a plastic glass*

'Sorry, we don't have any glasses'

it's still my local, though. GRIMACE.

Marty McFly

I always used to think Cheers was so depressing, probably because it was shot on film and as a result had that old-timey grainy, dirty look.

Maybe this is why I've never really had a 'local', or, indeed, become much of a drinker.

SetToStun

From when I started drinking in pubs I had always assumed Cheers was pretty much right, apart from the place being so empty all the time. I've always seemed to find places where you do get to know the landlord and the regulars pretty quickly, where you can just walk in to a chorus of hellos and have your drink served without you ever actually asking for it. That's been in places like the City as well as Rainham, Hornchurch, Romford, Chelsmford - admittedly not the widest geographical range, but I've had the same vibe from pubs in every corner of the country but never had the chance to become a proper regular on account of only being there on holiday. Maybe I have a good radar for good, friendly pubs or something. Mind you, things are a bit different since I moved; myself and the other half don't seem to have had much of a chance to use the pubs near our place so I don't have a local yet - apart from a pub run by friends, but that's a couple of miles or so away. This will change - the place at the top of our road seems friendly enough although it appears it can be a bit "lively" from time to time.