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Day Today-esque headlines in real news stories

Started by Jumble Cashback, February 03, 2011, 08:08:53 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

thisaintnopicnic


Jerzy Bondov

Yep, that certainly is Plymouth.

Spoiler alert
It's actually Tavistock if you read the story. I used to go in that Morrison's all the time! Luckily for me I never had a pound coin to release a trolley. Reading on further, it's not that kind of trolley. It's a shelf stacking one. So I can just fuck off, can't I?
[close]


BlodwynPig


Petey Pate


BlodwynPig

Jeff Goldblum found inside antique cabinet outside Nantwich

QuoteThe star of The Tall Guy and The Fly was shaken and confused but unharmed. The actor says he has no idea how he ended up in Nantwich, let alone the cabinet. Auctioneers believe the incident may have increased the starting price for the 16th century piece ten-fold.


BlodwynPig

Quote from: turnstyle on December 10, 2012, 01:02:28 PM
Monkey in sheepskin jacket on the loose at Ikea in Toronto

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-20667481

Discuss this in detail over in the Biggy's Canadian adventure thread.

Jumble Cashback

BBC website today:

GRAIL MISSION SHOWS BATTERED MOON

Again, it's the non-sequiturs that please me the most.

Glebe


BlodwynPig

Gibbon in Bomber jacket seen harassing nightclub attendees


Head Gardener


jenna appleseed

"  'Bono's eyesight is deteriorating,' says John Lennon's son"
http://www.nme.com/news/bono/68023

(There's a moment in the With Or Without You video where Bono suddenally turns into day today Chris Morris  - I think it's the hideous slicked back hair + the face he pulls that does it. Him & the Edge keep turning into their Harry and Paul parody during the rest of the video.)

jenna appleseed

yesterday's front page of the Daily Mirror



can't find a large pic of the full page but this was the genuine, instore cover yesterday - it's like a Brass Eye hoax/photoshop fuckery gone far too far 



BlodwynPig


Thomas

That's strange. Maybe it should be amended to 'Puppy thrown at German biker gang two-and-a-bit years ago'. That would be Day Today-esque.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: Thomas on January 14, 2013, 01:03:25 PM
That's strange. Maybe it should be amended to 'Puppy thrown at German biker gang two-and-a-bit years ago'. That would be Day Today-esque.

i've fallen into this trap a few times - bloody BBC on slow news days.


Kane Jones

I read that as 'Cannabis' and now I'm trying to figure out which would be worse.

Petey Pate



Thomas

The caption and the tourist quote made me laugh in the shop this morning:[nb]Yeah, the shop, not a shop.[/nb]