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March 28, 2024, 04:08:38 PM

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Day Today-esque headlines in real news stories

Started by Jumble Cashback, February 03, 2011, 08:08:53 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Mister Six

Is that just a viral promo for Half Life 2 episode three?

Head Gardener






BlodwynPig


Thomas

It's not as bizarre as we've had, but I did read it in Chris Morris' voice -

BBC News - Google 'forces' Swedish word removal

jenna appleseed

from France 24

STOP PHOTOSHOPPING OFFICIALS INTO PORN, AUTHORITIES ASK BLACKMAILERS



Glebe

Justin Bieber's Monkey Quarantined in Germany.

...Apologies if this is old news. Wouldn't be surprised if it has it's own thread by now.

jenna appleseed


Thomas



Johnny Yesno


Jemble Fred

Okay everyone, left feet out, if we can get a bit of purchase I'm sure we can stop the world together...



[nb]Also:

[/nb]




Deanjam

This is an old one, so apologies if it's been shown before, but it makes me laugh:



also:


Pepotamo1985

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2013/apr/20/played-tag-23-years-experience

Possibly the best thing I'm going to find all year.

"Experience: I've played a game of tag for 23 years

Now we are grown men, we don't run like Usain Bolt, so subterfuge and collusion have become our weapons. Eleven months of the year are spent planning. Collaborating with a friend is where the fun is – we can spend hours discussing approaches.

I was tagged spectacularly a few years back when a friend popped round to show me his new car. As I approached it, Sean sprang out of the boot where he'd been hiding and tagged me. He'd flown 800 miles from Seattle to San Francisco just to stop being "it" – to shrug off the "mantle of shame", as we call it. My wife was so startled she fell and injured her knee, but she wasn't angry; she was pleased to see Sean. All our partners are good-natured about the game – they even get involved in the sting operations.

Some things we did early on we wouldn't do now – like when Mike sneaked into Brian's house at night, crept into the bedroom and woke him up to tag him, surprising the life out of him and his girlfriend.

Perhaps one of the most unexpected tags was during Mike's father's funeral. During the service, he felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to find Joe mouthing, "You're it." Afterwards, he said his father would have approved, because he found our game hilarious.


When the month arrives, you feel as edgy as a deer in hunting season, locking doors and checking under cars to avoid being caught. When a friend stops answering his phone, you know he's up to something – and your days are numbered. Patrick, who does everything he can to avoid being caught, sometimes spends February in Hawaii. When he learned that he was likely to be tagged as he arrived at the airport, he hired a man to hold up a card with his name on it in arrivals, so one of us would wait near it. Then he slipped out of another exit.

As well as nerve-racking, it's hugely enjoyable, and I love the ingenuity involved. When the game had a lull a few years back, my daughter persuaded me to reactivate it; we disguised ourselves as an elderly couple and surprised Joe in a restaurant. His double take was classic.

Sometimes the strategies don't come to fruition. Mike once flew to Boston and staked out Chris's place, hiding in bushes and searching in bars, only to discover after two days that he was away for the weekend."


Glebe

The Sun headline about 'The Rude Planet' (just glanced it in a shop, cannae remember it exactly) RE: the Nasa penis incident was pure Morris.

Deanjam

Not a headline, but didn't know where else to put this, as seen on Twitter today from a North Devon paper.


Shoulders?-Stomach!


BlodwynPig



Head Gardener