Author Topic: Terrible album covers  (Read 182046 times)

Nelson Swillie

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #60 on: February 14, 2011, 04:00:19 PM »
I agree that one's not so good - but you also said 'pretty much anything' by them.  Weren't all the covers done by Roger Dean?

This one I love - had the poster for years.

Cerys, I love you.

Asia's first album is brilliant. And Roger Dean is a genius. And I'll rudely gesture at anyone who says otherwise.

Apparently Saddam Hussein was a fan, but don't let that put you off!

In fact, I think this thread could run and run. It's fantastic. Seriously.



I remember seeing this when it first came out and thinking "What the FUCK, Pete?"



Sort of thing an attention seeking fifteen year old would draw in the back of his geography folder. Pish!



I don't understand why such a photogenic group would say "Let's have a butt ugly doll with a shitty target design superimposed over it on the cover, that'll work."



Honest to God, who else thinks this is a Bill Bailey spoof taken a step too far?



"Because I'm on the cover of a crappy album with guitars that sound like bagpipes!"



This cover is creepy.

Cerys

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #61 on: February 14, 2011, 08:27:02 PM »
Where's my Valentine card, then?

I also had this one as a poster-



Brilliant stuff.

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #62 on: February 14, 2011, 08:30:46 PM »
Huh! Hippies.

Mister Six

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #63 on: February 14, 2011, 08:47:32 PM »

Geraint

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #64 on: February 15, 2011, 12:59:32 AM »

Absorb the anus burn

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #65 on: February 15, 2011, 01:29:57 AM »
I... kind of like that.









is this the bit you kind of like best?

Doomy Dwyer

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #66 on: February 15, 2011, 10:22:43 AM »
Staggering album, one of the greatest soul albums to come out of Memphis, containing 'Try a Little Tenderness', 'Tennessee Waltz', 'Fa Fa Fa Fa Fa (Sad Song), 'Lovers fucking Prayer' for Christs sake. And the stick this pile of sjit on the front of it -



Piss poor from every conceivable viewpoint, especially considering 'Otis Blue', 'Pain in My Heart' and 'The Soul Album' had such pleasing covers.

This one's similarly lovely contents are massively let down by the crude daub that adorns its cover -



Whereas this one's cover really does bespeak of the cruel disappointment that awaits the unfortunate listener -



Diabolical sixth form shit from front cover to final note. Go back and do it again.



Johnny Townmouse

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #67 on: February 15, 2011, 10:25:29 AM »




NoSleep

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #68 on: February 15, 2011, 11:07:23 AM »
This one's similarly lovely contents are massively let down by the crude daub that adorns its cover -




I'd have to disagree. This cover has everything: Pyramids, mountains, sun, moon, stars, sea, a ship, an optical illusion (is it a wheel or is it a pit?), a cactus giving the finger, and a huge bird astride a naked large-breasted woman.

Doomy Dwyer

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #69 on: February 15, 2011, 11:36:25 AM »
I'd have to disagree. This cover has everything: Pyramids, mountains, sun, moon, stars, sea, a ship, an optical illusion (is it a wheel or is it a pit?), a cactus giving the finger, and a huge bird astride a naked large-breasted woman.

Reading your description, I can only admit I have erred.

I feel the way one of those lepers must have felt having had Our Lord lay his hands upon him and curing him. It is a brilliant cover. And my leg feels better. 

Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #70 on: February 15, 2011, 11:56:20 AM »
There are awkward birthdays and there are very awkward birthdays:



Actually, these are the lyrics:

Quote
JULIE'S SIXTEENTH BIRTHDAY
SPOKEN
What's your hurry Jim? One more drink won't hurt nothin'
Well okay I said but then I got to be runnin'
you see my little Julie just turned sixteen today
and tonight she is going out on her very first date

Lord knows I never been much of a father
Probably spent more time right here than I have at home with
my daughter
So tonight I'm making up for a lotta lost time
a lot of hurt feelings and a lot of broken promises

CHORUS

For once in my life I'm gonna do something right
I'm gonna be home for my Julie tonight
Its her sixteenth birthday (spoken) and you know its her first
date
This is one promise that I'm not gonna break

Aw come on, have one more Jim...you got plenty of time
But that one led to many and I lost track of the time
When I looked at my watch it was a quarter till eight
So I left in a hurry since I was already late

As I got closer to home I started to think
Won't do me no harm to have one more drink
So I reached for the bottle I kept under the seat
When I looked up, my whole life passed right in front of me

Next thing I remembered I was just comin' to
In a hospital bed and right then I knew
That I'd caused something awful to happen last night
On my way home to Julie to set myself right

At the foot of the bed stood my best friend Lou
He walked to my side and asked what he could do
I said, "Lou, I know I won't make it but don't let me die
Not knowin' the truth 'bout what happened last night

He said, "Jim, you lost control, crossed the yellow line
Hit a car head on and Lord I wish I was lyin'
Cause a young man was injured and a lovely girl died
And I thought about that last drink and tears filled my eyes

I said Lou, should I pass on before she comes in
Be sure and tell Julie how sorry I am for spoilin' her birthday
He said, "Jim, you can save your breath
Cause when you meet her in heaven, you can tell her yourself

Repeat Chorus

Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #71 on: February 15, 2011, 12:03:54 PM »



BlodwynPig

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #72 on: February 15, 2011, 12:36:28 PM »
Suprised this hasn't tickled anyone's fancy yet


Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #73 on: February 15, 2011, 01:56:35 PM »

Doomy Dwyer

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #74 on: February 15, 2011, 02:02:51 PM »


Is that the lovely Stephen Fry on the end (fnarr, fnarr) there?

Here's the great Derek Bell of the Chieftains 1981 solo meisterwerk -



And even the King's wants in on the double entendre/shite cover action  -



That last one nearly got me savagely beaten by heavily tattooed quiff sporting Yorkshireman in the gift shop at Graceland back in 2005. Happy days.


Johnny Townmouse

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #75 on: February 15, 2011, 02:10:22 PM »


Sessions, Izzard, Fry. Together again.

Subtle Mocking

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #76 on: February 15, 2011, 02:10:58 PM »

BlodwynPig

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #77 on: February 15, 2011, 02:31:08 PM »
A young Rob Brydon on the left.

and the right

Cerys

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #78 on: February 15, 2011, 02:42:34 PM »




Things improved fror them once they bumped the scary one off.

Dead kate moss

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #79 on: February 15, 2011, 02:52:53 PM »
Crusader's Quartet? There's five of them.

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #80 on: February 15, 2011, 03:50:38 PM »


I have to disagree with you there. It's an excellent graphic representation of one of the song titles. But then I do like Julian Opie, and it reminds me of some of his work:



Sorry about the late edit, Johnny.

Johnny Townmouse

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #81 on: February 15, 2011, 03:53:26 PM »
I have to disagree with you there. It's an excellent graphic representation of one of the song titles.

I'm aware of what the graphic alludes to, but I absolutely despise this form of primary colour 80s style artwork, particularly as it has had a recent resurgance. It also reminds me of how fucking dreadful The Cure became around the time of Let's Go To Bed.

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #82 on: February 15, 2011, 04:00:24 PM »
I'm aware of what the graphic alludes to, but I absolutely despise this form of primary colour 80s style artwork, particularly as it has had a recent resurgance.

I see. My late edit suggests I don't feel the same way about primary colour artwork.

Quote
It also reminds me of how fucking dreadful The Cure became around the time of Let's Go To Bed.

That's a bit unfair on Boys Don't Cry when there's two or three amazing albums between that and Japanese Whispers.

Johnny Townmouse

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #83 on: February 15, 2011, 04:19:52 PM »
I see. My late edit suggests I don't feel the same way about primary colour artwork.

Yeah, my aesthetics have a hard time with that sort of thing because of just how much I despised the 80s. It's no wonder I became a goth (for six months).

Quote
That's a bit unfair on Boys Don't Cry when there's two or three amazing albums between that and Japanese Whispers.

I was doing my best to make sure that nobody thought that I was alluding to the fact that really shit period Cure was around the time of this ablum. The sleeve reminds me of the Let's Go To Bed video - Smith prancing about like a perfumed ponce to the sounds of dreadful pop-synth-goth. I actually don't understand why that sleeve is so bad, and I feel it completely misrepresents the songs it envelopes. Whilst it does narratively evoke Killing an Arab, it does little to evoke the rather down-best post-punk sound.

I generally dislike Cure sleeves. Pornography in particular - though it is, as the hipsters always say, their best album (100 Years is startling good). I do like the cover for Staring at the Sea a lot. And the Peel Sesions, but that doesn't count.


Cerys

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #84 on: February 15, 2011, 04:43:10 PM »
Crusader's Quartet? There's five of them.

Clearly they named themselves in anticipation of the convenient 'accident'.

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #85 on: February 15, 2011, 05:05:18 PM »
Yeah, my aesthetics have a hard time with that sort of thing because of just how much I despised the 80s. It's no wonder I became a goth (for six months).

Reason to think the 80s weren't so bad, surely!

Quote
I was doing my best to make sure that nobody thought that I was alluding to the fact that really shit period Cure was around the time of this ablum. The sleeve reminds me of the Let's Go To Bed video - Smith prancing about like a perfumed ponce to the sounds of dreadful pop-synth-goth. I actually don't understand why that sleeve is so bad, and I feel it completely misrepresents the songs it envelopes. Whilst it does narratively evoke Killing an Arab, it does little to evoke the rather down-best post-punk sound.

Fair enough. But the sleeve represents Fire in Cairo, doesn't it?

Quote
I generally dislike Cure sleeves. Pornography in particular - though it is, as the hipsters always say, their best album (100 Years is startling good). I do like the cover for Staring at the Sea a lot. And the Peel Sesions, but that doesn't count.

Aagh! Not Pornography as well! I like its blurryness and I'm not a hipster AFAIK.

Catalogue Trousers

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #86 on: February 15, 2011, 07:01:11 PM »
For those times when one narcissistic tosser just isn't enough.






Plus FOOT-BALL.

Subtle Mocking

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #87 on: February 15, 2011, 07:18:00 PM »
Is that at Stamford Bridge too? The cunt.

BlodwynPig

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Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #88 on: February 15, 2011, 07:42:44 PM »
Is that a limp albino horse penis slumped over his knee? The cunt.

Re: Terrible album covers
« Reply #89 on: February 15, 2011, 07:59:19 PM »



This cover is creepy.

This looks like John Otway and pals taking the piss out of The Modern Lovers.