Valentines Day

[Vermschneid Mehearties]

That's brought back happy memories of flavoured lipgloss (Applied from a little stick bottle with a roller) which were all the rage when I was walikg out with the ladies

Well I don't think i'll ever look at a tube of the stuff in quite the same way again.

Makes me want to kiss myself.

Find the nearest mirror and do it.

[TraceyQ]

Christ no, it's Sunday morning, I won't look at least half human until the drugs kick in. (I go for a shower).

[Gazeuse]

Ah, you can still get it now, but they're called juicy tubes and cost a tenner each. Yum. Makes me want to kiss myself.

Blimey...Can you still get those slit skirts that all the girls were wearing then too???

Pass a spangle!!!

[Vermschneid Mehearties]

*Maybe I should take her to the Manchester meet*

'Umm..yeah right..see...there's this forum thing on the interweb where I hang out and waste my time. And there having a meet up thing. So i thought it'd be cool if y'know, we like went along sort of thing......to manchester.'

Sheesh. I'd never inflict that on her. She's 16. You'd probably smoke her for breakfast.

[Timmay]

She's 16.

Paedo.

And anyway, who knows - she may be thinking exactly the same thing...

"How do I ask him? Look, I'm on this thing called the internet, and on this chatroom type thing for Chris Morris - know him? And anyway, well, they're meeting up soon. Fancy coming along?"

[Vermschneid Mehearties]

Yeah. I bet she's a lurker. Come on Jenny, show yer face!

Paedo.

Pah. Everythings above board and legal. In fact I probably break the record for 'oldest girlfriend at 17 in my town'.

[mr rou-rou]

I think it's sick that as a 40 year old man you are still pretending to be 17.

there's only one way to settle this, cut him in half and count the rings

PS, I went out, didn't pull, didn't come close, had a kebab and a wank, result!

[Dr. Gizmonic]

I just left a box of chocolates on the kitchen table with a sweet, bitter-bile post-it attached. Didn't prevent every single one being eaten, though.

So, what did I spend my valentines doing?

Well, I went out to a "Bloody Valentine" dance thing attended by exactly three people and fifty doner kebabs draped in skin and sweat. Went for a walk by the river, talked to a nice guy who turned out to be frustratingly heterosexual. Came home, found a note from my landlady slid under my door. Then I tried to kill my hamster, then myself.

I feel like a Jew at Christmas.

[Jimmy]

Actually singledom *aches* now; it's horrible, and I almost certainly give off an air of desperation, so I'm knackered really, and so much love and affection to give too (arrogant? boswellox).
I've made a conscious decision (heh) to not ramble on about things depressive and romantic, but here I'll mention something that's really bothering me now.

It was a week before Valentine's last year when I almost asked someone out who I was told also liked me quite a bit, and I fudged it - had no way of contacting her again.
Now I ought to be able to forget about her, but I can't. It's weird and unnerving, as I can't help but wonder whether she might have been perfectly 'suited' to me and me to her.
The fact that I keep seeing people who look like her bothers me too - It's a horrible sort of regret for something that most people would forget about quickly enough.
This could have gone into that 'what if'-type thread.

Carry on, everyone.

-

Wow, so I'm not alone then... that's a bloody similar despcription to my situation, even down to the seeing lookalikes part- but I just attribute that to poor eyesight as a result of too much wanking...

And for the no way of contacting thing, I sympathise. This girls home phone numbers listed in the phone directory, but thats no good is it??? What the hell would I say, I'd look like a right stalker...

Oh well, at least I've got my season ticket at Hillsborough to cheer me up... *sighs*

[Smackhead Kangaroo]

THink of the odds, in apll probability she was an evil little runtbitch and would have made your life misery and your wallet withered.
Meh all this needing someone else malarkey is enough to make me vomit form my ears. You need a healthy dose of denial my boy.  That or Ye olde Englishe Remedye- a spoonof Tar water. Clogs the innards right up.

[kyaputen]

... Thatcher has a lot to answer for.

I'm no defender of the Tory scum that is the she-devil Thatcher but surely blaming her for Valentine's Day is a bit much. We've been capitalists since well before the 1980s.

:-)

[The Region Legion]

Well my girlfriend was in New York, so Valentines itself didn't really work out, and I haven't got a card yet.. I assume Clintons won't have burnt them all in some kind of odd ceremony as I'll see her tomorrow and should probably get one.

Oh, and does anyone know a store that sells massive cuddly toys (as in 2 foot minimum)? She was threatening me with one and I thought it would be amusing to get her one as payback.

[Rats]

I didn't even realise it was valentines day which is just as well. I know you all invented it just to make me depressed.

[Munday's Chylde]

I didn't even realise it was valentines day which is just as well. I know you all invented it just to make me depressed.

[Rats]

Aw, int that nice, is that a side on shot of alf in the background?
 

[butnut]

PS, I went out, didn't pull, didn't come close, had a kebab and a wank, result!

For some reason, the idea of eating a Kebab while masturbating seems immensely amusing.

And your Valentine's night sounds like mine. But I didn't have a kebab or even attempt to pull.

[blue jammer]

For some reason, the idea of eating a Kebab while masturbating seems immensely amusing.

Just be careful and wash your hands before, else you'll get chilli sauce burn.

Errrr, someone told me once in one of those "what happened down at casualty" discussion days.

[23 Daves]

Well, I didn't get a Valentine's card for the sixth year running... despite buying my girlfriend one, and a huge bunch of roses...

Still, I suppose there's always next year... if we're still together.  Pfffff.

[no_offenc]

My girlfriend's only 17.  Okay, I'm 18 myself, but yanno.

Valentine's day was spent........working in Maccies.  Eugh.  Then I went to an 18th party with the girlf and spent the rest of the night round at hers watching The Lost Boys and The Nightmare Before Christmas (don't bother mocking, they're great).  Crap day, good night.  Awwwww.

[Lady Beany]

Anyone who has seen my post/s in 'The Nothing of Note to Say' thread will know that I now fucking hate Valentine's day.   My boyfriend is a fucking cunt.  He STILL has not made it up to me ya know!  I went out shoppng yesterday just to try and cheer myself up and it didn't work... balls!

Please look out for the forthcoming 'How Do I Dump Him?' thread!

[Purple Tentacle]

Stayed in. Wrote each other cards on the day, in seperate rooms.

Conned her into playing me at Risk, I won. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!


No sex.

[hencole]

I had a great Valentines. Went down the local and played darts, and then back to mine for a game of late night poker. I won! Suck on that you loosers.

[Timmay]

After adorning her with expensive flowers and an MP3 player (the old romantic I am), went for a fucking long walk over the Cotswold hills. Quite nice really, 'cept I ache now.

[little pianist]

Well i got my first valentine's card *ever* on Saturday.

But alas, she mings.

:rollingeyes:

[Johnny Yesno]

Didn't do much on Saturday but went for a meal with Ms Yesno on Sunday. I had tumbleweed in my main course (and not just cos my jokes were shit).
This was her Valentine's card to me:



Romantic, huh?