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Your absolute least favourite song

Started by Jumble Cashback, April 13, 2011, 01:29:40 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

CaledonianGonzo


Dead kate moss

Good Life by Inner City. 'Goof life good life good life good life... good life!' ah fuck off!

Spiteface

Quote from: rjd2 on April 26, 2012, 01:26:15 AM
while its no worse than anything Jessie J will ever do, this is still really bad. Seems to be viral as well.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__HeE6NWmDE

Heard that today, listening to Hollywood Babble-On. Ralph Garman issued an apology to Rebecca Black upon hearing it, it truly is dire.

El Unicornio, mang

'Auld Lang Syne'. It just depresses the fuck out of me.

KLG-7A

Quote from: Spiteface on May 01, 2012, 09:49:55 PM
Heard that today, listening to Hollywood Babble-On. Ralph Garman issued an apology to Rebecca Black upon hearing it, it truly is dire.
Stop falling for it!

babyshambler

Quote from: El Unicornio, mang on May 01, 2012, 09:53:20 PM
'Auld Lang Syne'. It just depresses the fuck out of me.

Just reading your post certainly took me to a sad place. Mildly melancholic, at least.

Catalogue Trousers

Has anyone nominated this yet?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1Jb9aTSoSc

"Hey Matthew" by Karel Fialka.

Now, I rather like "The Eyes Have It". A likeable, upbeat, good earworm of a song. But this...I can appreciate Karel's concern about his son. I can appreciate his wariness about television's distorted images and brainwashing potential. But it'd be better as a poem on the page, not a song in my ear.

In my younger, fitter, days, I once belonged to a gym that played a lot of 80s pop compilations as work-out music. I remember clearly being on a rowing machine when this came on. Now, that "woooo! diddle-iddle-iddle-dah-dah-dum" rhythm is pretty good for rowing, but I felt my will to excel draining with the first bars.

The spotter agreed. "Do you mind if I skip this?", he asked the gym at large, as he strode over and did just so. If our hands hadn't been full of oars, dumbells etc, he'd have received a standing ovation.

Jemble Fred

It just seemed to be a weird, fun track when I was a kid.

"The A Team, The A Team. I like, The A team."

But the fact that I remember only that, and am fucked if I'm going to click that link and revisit it now, suggests that your nomination may be fair.

23 Daves

Quote from: Jemble Fred on August 31, 2012, 03:22:26 PM
It just seemed to be a weird, fun track when I was a kid.

"The A Team, The A Team. I like, The A team."

But the fact that I remember only that, and am fucked if I'm going to click that link and revisit it now, suggests that your nomination may be fair.

"Hey Matthew" is utterly dreadful.  Don't even go there.  The fact that Matthew in the song and video was such a twee little git made it all the more infuriating.  "I want to be your fwend".  Oh, naff off you slobbering, fidgety, finger-chewing boy.  There was a kid at my school who looked quite a lot like Matthew as well, and he loathes the song because it turned his life into hell for awhile.

Karel Fialka did do a lot of doomy post-apocalyptic synth-pop before penning "Hey Matthew" and having his only hit with it.  I don't think his earlier material is in any way essential listening, as it uses the kind of quirky, jerky arrangements we just haven't heard since (a least) 1981, so it seems incredibly quaint - but it's still a massive leap stylistically from that to his big moment. 

It's haunted me for much of my life. That earworm riff makes my penis shrivel as does the nauseating cod-reggae-funk-white-cunt groove. The vocal cadence is the low point of European musical creation.

It's also one of the catchiest records I've ever heard.

Your all wrong, I think its great and is due an X-factor revival.


After all these years, I think the one song above all others that can still make me run screaming for the hills is 'The Shoop Shoop Song/It's In His Kiss" by Cher, which I just absolutely detest.

From the opening beat and Cher's first word ("Doooooes"), my hackles immediately raise and I can't stand to be in the same room as whatever medium the piece of shit song's coming out of.

SUCH an excruciating tune.  I defy you to last more than 3 seconds.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VwGGZTZ-3pM  The video's rank n'all.

I regret clicking on that. Stopped it after 18 seconds too.

If you can play this til the end I'll give you a tenner:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNsmiqmaEWo



Dusty Gozongas

How's about Last Christmas by Wham? A tune with almost magickal vampyric powers, guaranteed to suck the life out of me to this day. It always conjours memories of being in nightclubs (which I hated with a passion anyway) for work/friends events and the whole thing being made infinitely worse every single year after the shitty fucking ditty had been released. I'd rather eat my own arse than ever hear it again. It's ghastly!

Couldn't disagree more, that's my fave Xmas song and one of my all time favourite songs full stop. The only downside is that you can't play it all year round, but I suppose that's what keeps it special.

Subtle Mocking

Quote from: Dusty Gozongas on September 01, 2012, 02:54:39 PM
How's about Last Christmas by Wham? A tune with almost magickal vampyric powers, guaranteed to suck the life out of me to this day. It always conjours memories of being in nightclubs (which I hated with a passion anyway) for work/friends events and the whole thing being made infinitely worse every single year after the shitty fucking ditty had been released. I'd rather eat my own arse than ever hear it again. It's ghastly!

I get that general feeling with most Christmas songs, sadly. There's a few exceptions (Sufjan's Christmas albums, for example, or The Waitresses' Christmas Wrapping), but any of those popular Christmas hits of yesteryear send me into some kind of deep depression that I don't come out of until mid-January. I guess the highest platitude I can grant it is that it doesn't imply that I'd be better off dead, like Band Aid 2004 does.

Jemble Fred

Christmas Wrapping is one of the only Xmas songs I absolutely have to switch off if it ever comes on in my vicinity. The first line – "Bah humbug, but that's too strong..." is perhaps my least favourite first line of any song too, a bad line, made worse by the delivery.

But then I despise that 'dispassionate female talking' singing style which was so popular in the early 80s – see also Jona Lewie's 'In The Kitchen At Parties' and The Flying Lizards' cover of 'Money'. Nails down a blackboard to me.

23 Daves

Oddly, I'm a misery-guts around Christmas usually, but there are loads of festive songs that sit on my iPod I feel I can't do without, perhaps because they became hard-wired into me as annual favourites when I was as a child.  "Merry Xmas Everybody", "I Believe In Father Christmas", "Feliz Navidad" - all great. 

The only Christmas song I feel violently opposed to is "Mistletoe and Wine" by Cliff, which truly is abysmal.  It's the slightly repressed jollity about the damn thing, and I think the sneaking sense I get that it sums up the parts of Christmas I hate the most with its plodding, repetitive nature.  Slade just emphasise the family antics and beery relief of the seasonal break, whereas Cliff half-heartedly whinnies about religion, children being forced to sing hymns, and how it's the only time of year trust and charity shows its face (you know, you could help by trying not being a Conservative all year round, Cliff).  "The Millennium Song" is even worse, but somewhat inevitably I haven't heard that one much since the millennium, so it's off the table as an irritant now. 

Oh, and "Merry Christmas Everyone" by Shakin' Stevens is bad as well, again because there's a kind of half-heartedness about it - no bounce or vim to speak of.  It's slightly subdued despite its upbeat nature, which just reminds me too much of enforced jollity.  And I hate the way Shaky really over-emphasies the dropped 'g's throughout (eg. "Havin' fun!") like he's enjoying himself so much he can't be bothered. And again: "The season for love and understandin'!", because of course it's quite OK for us to be belligerent and to kick the shit out of each other the rest of the year round. 

tookish

A Spaceman Came Travelling is clearly the worst Christmas song, and close to the worst song of all time. Chris de fucking Burgh with his smug fucking face and crap fringe thinks that 'the sweetest music' is his own shitty voice singing 'La, la la la, la la la, la la la' backed by a load of synth. I hate it. I fucking hate it. It's dreary and trite, just generally dreadful.

And like all truly offensive songs, what makes it most abhorrent is that the lyrics seep insidiously into your brain so you find yourself mumbling along and then hating yourself.

Christmas Wrapping is really bad too, though. And The Lonely Pup In The Christmas Shop. 

momatt

Quote from: Beep Cleep Chimney on August 31, 2012, 10:55:07 PM
After all these years, I think the one song above all others that can still make me run screaming for the hills is 'The Shoop Shoop Song/It's In His Kiss" by Cher, which I just absolutely detest.

Fuck you for reminding me of this tune.  It's one of those 'songs' that instantly puts me in an incandescent rage[nb]see also Rock DJ, American Pie and the Black Eyed Peas discography[/nb], furious with humanity for allowing such a crime on my cochleas.  Everyone around will look at me and shrug, 'it's only music'.  But it's not.  It's a reminder that the idiots are winning.  More offensive than the most demeaning forms of pornography or extreme racism.

Now it's in my head, you utter bastard.

Quote from: thecuriousorange on September 01, 2012, 02:28:05 AM
If you can play this til the end I'll give you a tenner:

You're a bastard as well.  Should've known better than to click on it really.

Jemble Fred

Is it specifically Cher's version which somehow annoys you, as it's a perfectly good slice of 60's bubblegum pop? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Shoop_Shoop_Song_(It's_in_His_Kiss)

However, Cher's voice can be an irritant when you're not in the mood, so I can see how that would irk.

momatt

Not heard any other versions.  Cher's voice is awful, but I imagine I'd strongly dislike any version of that song.  The lyrics just seem to grate at the remnants of my soul.

Having said that, Tiffany's version of 'I Think We're Alone Now' is quite crappy, whereas the original by Tommy James & the Shondells is just awesome.  I highly recommend it to everyone.
Just noticed Girls Aloud did one too.  It's safe to assume the quality of that without bothering to listen.

Morrison Lard

Enter Sandman by Metallica and Song 2 by Blur have to be the top two.
Shit songs used by media cunts looking for something edgy.

A close third would be Bohemian Rhapsody.

Neville Chamberlain

Enter Sandman is awful beyond all measure. On a personal level, it also brings back horrifying memories of visiting my French penfriend in Paris and being forced to sit in his room while he and his ridiculous mates played said song over and over a-fucking-gain.

On the plus side, all the guitar shops he dragged me to in Paris had actually taken the wise step of putting signs up on the front door banning idiots from playing the opening sequence of Enter Sandman when testing out new guitars.

Natnar

So it's the mid 90's. You're Annie Lennox and you haven't released any albums for a couple of years and the record company are getting on your case cause they want a new record, but you can't really be arsed to write any new songs. So you decide to rush out a half-arsed covers album to keep them happy, sucking out all the life of the songs and making a bland boring album that any supermarket/lift would be happy to have playing in the background. Then you decide to release the albums low point as the 2nd single! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZqPoriYXho

Quote from: Natnar on September 03, 2012, 01:24:52 PM
So it's the mid 90's. You're Annie Lennox and you haven't released any albums for a couple of years and the record company are getting on your case cause they want a new record, but you can't really be arsed to write any new songs. So you decide to rush out a half-arsed covers album to keep them happy, sucking out all the life of the songs and making a bland boring album that any supermarket/lift would be happy to have playing in the background. Then you decide to release the albums low point as the 2nd single! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZqPoriYXho

She's a serial cover-version offender, our Annie.  Almost as good as that one is her cover version of that deathless classic - 'Shining Light' by Ash.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OfJeQDkz4JU



Hank Venture

Quote from: Morrison Lard on September 03, 2012, 11:30:28 AM
A close third would be Bohemian Rhapsody.

Oh God, I wasn't sure about what I'd nominate, but this. And Paradise City by Guns 'n' Roses.

Unoriginal

Shake It by Metro Station. Not coincidentally, the three people I hate most on this planet loved it.