Awful band names

[Viero_Berlotti]

Anyone else noticed the propensity towards really awful names for new bands recently? Here are some examples of new band names that have annoyed me this year:

Portugal.The Man

She Keeps Bees

Foster The People

Big Troubles

Bass Drum Of Death

Dog Is Dead

Towns

Disappearers

Porcelain Raft

Bleeding Knees Club

Christian AIDS

Love Inks

Braids

Eagulls

Niki & The Dove

Reptar

I realise that after over 50 years of pop music and bands, most of the good names have been taken, but there are some real stinkers about at the moment and some are beyond parody. Maybe that's the point though, and I'm being old and just not getting it.

[Famous Mortimer]

I went to the Rescue Rooms in Nottingham a while back and every poster seemed to advertise a band whose name was designed to piss me off.

[CaledonianGonzo]

To be fair, aren't most band names terrible?  The challenge is to think of any genuinely great ones.

[boki]

Anyone else noticed the propensity towards really awful names for new bands recently?

Yeah, but I don't mind most of the ones in your list so I should probably shut up...at least bands have now learnt not to put 'audio' in their name somewhere.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

I realised quite recently that the worst band name ideas in the world are split two ways- one way 1960s commercial buildings, one way characters from Porridge. Look here:

1960's Commercial buildings:

Belgravia

Concordia

Grosvenor

Phoenix

Characters from Porridge:

Fletcher

Godber

McKay

Baraclough

I hope this settles the argument.

[Neville Chamberlain]

Those band names listed in the opening post don't really bother me so much - what bothers me are names like "Coldplay" or "Snow Patrol" or "Athlete" or "Keane". But then maybe I just hate every single fucking thing about those bands anyway.

However, my special award for crap band allied with crap name goes to "Elbow". I mean fucking seriously. Actually, "Elbow" might not be a bad name if the band itself was some sort of slightly quirky, oddball band - but they're not. With their dreary, oooh-look-the-singer's-so-deep-he's-got-his-eyes-closed earnestness, they really are the worst band on the entire planet.

Elbow.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

I was speaking to purlieu about shit band names not long back and he cited Pens as being the worst he'd come across.

Christian AIDS

Haha very funny but I don't get why you'd undermine your act like that. Maybe I'm too much of a SRSLY musician.

[Johnny Textface]

Rubbish band name: "Wu Lyf"

Genius band name: "Supergrass"

[Viero_Berlotti]

I was speaking to purlieu about shit band names not long back and he cited Pens as being the worst he'd come across.

Yeah, there seems to be a lot of pluralised nouns or verbs as band names at the moment, and don't forget the omission of 'The' as a prefix. Hurts, Cults, Battles, Kettles, Chins, Jumps (ok I made the last three up).

If Elbow started out today, they'd have to be called Elbows.

Also popular is the band name that sounds like a child's picture book; Florence and the Machine, Noah and the Whale, Niki and the Dove etc...

[SteveDave]

To be fair, aren't most band names terrible?  The challenge is to think of any genuinely great ones.

The Velvet Underground
Depeche Mode
The Rolling Stones
The White Stripes
The Who
Primal Scream

All good band names.

I wanted my 1st band to be called Jesus Christ as I thought it'd be amazing on a poster "LIVE! TONITE! JESUS CHRIST!!!"

[BlodwynPig]

Viva Brother = Bad

Big Brother and The Holding Company = hmmm?

Bros. = Rubbish

Brother Beyond = Ace

[Franny Joyce]

Does it offend you yeah?

I don't care how many layers of irony they are operating through, that is just proper shite.

I quite like some of the plural noun/verb without the "the" names though, Emeralds is pretty good and fits the music nicely. I also agree Elbow could work if they sounded like deerhoof or melt banana or something but they don't.

[CaledonianGonzo]

The Velvet Underground
Depeche Mode
The Rolling Stones
The White Stripes
The Who
Primal Scream

Primal Scream is always the example I give of a genuinely brilliant band name.  VU also works, but I'm not convinced by any of the others, I'm afraid.  I like the way that The Rolling Stones contracts down to The Stones, almost to the extent that I think that would just have been the better name for them.

I also quite like Queen as a name, but after that I really do struggle.  13th Floor Elevators is quite good, I suppose.  I dislike The Clash in general, but I can't deny that their name works.

Not that it matters - it's not like I'm suddenly going to dislike The Beach Boys or The Band cos they've got terrible names.

[Viero_Berlotti]

Not that it matters - it's not like I'm suddenly going to dislike The Beach Boys or The Band cos they've got terrible names.

That's true, I love the music of My Morning Jacket, but they've got to have one of the worst names in the history of Rock and Roll.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

I don't see what's wrong with Depeche Mode or My Morning Jacket as names.

[Phil_A]

I always thought Test Icicles was the pinaccle of shit band names. It's just so...shit.

I'm sure we've mentioned this before, but the Stereophonics started off being called TLC, which apparently stood for "Tragic Love Company". No, really.

[Viero_Berlotti]

Actually looking at some of the thread titles in general bullshit at the moment I'm starting to think some of them would make good 'awful' band names:

Dying a Virgin

What Should I Hang On My Wall?

Paul Is Dead

Dawn Of The Dad

Who Knows About Spiders?

BEERS

Those Who Can, Teach... When?

So Farewell Then Space Shuttle

Victorian People Looking Happy

[Neville Chamberlain]

I was always put off by the name Wizards of Twiddly. I never bothered to investigate them despite their popping up every now and then over the years on my musical radar in relation to Cardiacs, but I was always worried they'd be a silly band with flutes, a sort of horribly sub-par Gong[nb]I like Gong, by the way.[/nb] with a bit of Ozrics nonsense thrown in.

But I couldn't have been any wronger. They are magnificent and exciting and they rock and I love 'em.

[Subtle Mocking]

Rubbish band name: "Wu Lyf"

Befitting a rubbish band. Glad somebody has mentioned Viva Brother too.

Beady Eye is a shit name, probably chosen just to get Liam's terrible CDs next to the Beatles in HMV.

[CaledonianGonzo]

I was always put off by the name Wizards of Twiddly.

Similarly, I was always put off a further investigation of the music of Dumpy's Rusty Nuts because of, etc.

[Neville Chamberlain]

Actually looking at some of the thread titles in general bullshit at the moment I'm starting to think some of them would make good 'awful' band names:

That reads like the line-up for some shitty emo festival.

[Viero_Berlotti]

.....and this thread cannot exist without a mention of the Crown Prince of awful band names; Get Cape, Wear Cape, Fly!

[SteveDave]

Befitting a rubbish band. Glad somebody has mentioned Viva Brother too.

Beady Eye is a shit name, probably chosen just to get Liam's terrible CDs next to the Beatles in HMV.

But then The Beatles is a really bad band name. A pun. Good Lord. They should've stuck with Johnny & The Moondogs.

[SteveDave]

There used to be a band in Cardiff called Three Random Words. You could just see them patting each other on the back when they came up with that.

[Fabian Thomsett]

I always liked the band name Joan of Arse, mainly for being defiantly bad.

[BlodwynPig]

I was always put off by the name Wizards of Twiddly. I never bothered to investigate them despite their popping up every now and then over the years on my musical radar in relation to Cardiacs, but I was always worried they'd be a silly band with flutes, a sort of horribly sub-par Gong[nb]I like Gong, by the way.[/nb] with a bit of Ozrics nonsense thrown in.

But I couldn't have been any wronger. They are magnificent and exciting and they rock and I love 'em.

Ozrics are my favourite band...you bastard, I had so much respect for you. My friend calls them Ostrich Testicles.

[BlodwynPig]

Similarly, I was always put off a further investigation of the music of Dumpy's Rusty Nuts because of, etc.

Me too, and Dumpy's appearance.

Wizards of Twiddly new album is pretty good.

[Neville Chamberlain]

Yes, it is!

And I was a little harsh on the Ozrics, I feel. I'm just having a bad day, plus I worked myself up into a lather over Elbow. Sorry, old chap. Blame Guy Garvey for my foul temper.

[The Boston Crab]

I actually like 'Bass Drum Of Death'. They need to be serious noise bros though, just a couple of them, three players max, must all be live instruments, no electronics and they need to have no real tunes, just balls and loads of amps, like Boris but more minimal and thrashy. These are the precise circumstances under which one can get away with that kind of name.

At the other end of the spectrum, you've got Japanese band names which are almost all universally great just because[nb]we're racists[/nb].

[BlueSkies]

At the other end of the spectrum, you've got Japanese band names which are almost all universally great just because.

Always liked the name Plus-Tech Squeeze Box. Those kerazee Japs.

Another good name: The The

A bad name: Mcfly. This one just annoys. How can anything so awful reference something so great? They weren't even born when the films came out, they have no claim to that name!