Viz Highlights

[danyulx]

The declaration on the application slip...

They misspelt Dennis Nilsen's name. I'm not happy.

I recently purchased the following DVD and they misspelt his name on there as well, in completely different way.

What the fuck's going on eh?

[Dead kate moss]

Possibly not the UKs most notorious mass murderer either. Ripper (Jack) wins surely, then Ripper (Yorkshire), then Dirty Den is probably just after Brady & Hindley, not to mention a few that might have shot to fame after that DVD or its blurb came out (West, Shipman, Blair amirite?). Depends what you term 'mass' maybe.

[danyulx]

A mass murderer is someone who murders a fuckload of people within about a ninety-minute time frame. That bloke in Cumbria a few years ago - who everyone's now forgotten about -  was a textbook example.

Whilst a serial killer takes his time..... years, decades even...

[Tokyo Sexwhale]

That Cumbria shooting was less than two years ago!

And I had to look up his name.  So the moral is if you want notoriety and infamy - choose the long game!

[danyulx]

I don't know. Thomas Hamilton done alight for himself.

[Tokyo Sexwhale]

He killed a lot of schoolchildren, which added to his infamy.

Can you name the Hungerford killer without looking him up?

[danyulx]

Michael.

[Tokyo Sexwhale]

Go on...

[Dead kate moss]

MICHAEL HUNGERFORD. MICHAEL RYAN? oops caps.

[danyulx]

...Robert Ryan. He was born at Savernake Hospital in Marlborough, Wiltshire, near Hungerford, Berkshire on 18 May 1960. He was an only child, and his father, Alfred Henry Ryan, was 55 years old when he was born. Michael lived with his mother, Dorothy, a dinner lady at the local primary school.

[Zetetic]

Thomas Hamilton done alight for himself.

I didn't recognise the name.

I suppose it's a trivial observation, but I think part of it is simply down to the fact that serial killers almost invariably end up killing, or at least plucking their victims, for a wide variety of places. So the best you can do to sum the deaths up without referring to the actual killers, is 'the Moors murders' or something similarly nebulous.

I've no idea what the lads wot did 9/11 were called.



Edit: Also, at fucking last, an excuse to expunge this from my mind:

Tim Key's let himself lose cues to depth.

[Blumf]

I've no idea what the lads wot did 9/11 were called.

Lee Brennan
Jimmy Constable
Simon 'Spike' Dawbarn

Kenny Everett is looking well

[Dead kate moss]

We also had, and have perhaps forgotten, the Camden Ripper (lived near me, no idea what his name is without googling) and that twat who put bombs in gay pubs, possibly called Colin Ireland. Had a catchy but un-PC name given to him by the filth, The Fairy Liquidator. Nice one plods.

These people are often only kept in the public consciousness when The Sun moans about them having Christmas dinner.

[danyulx]

I suppose it's a trivial observation, but I think part of it is simply down to the fact that serial killers almost invariably end up killing, or at least plucking their victims, for a wide variety of places.

A new one on me. You get the odd Henry Lee Lucas and Ted Bundy now and again - who travels the country, offing prey left, right and centre. But they're a rarity. Almost all of them plucked their victims from the city they were were living in at the time, or neighbouring cities at most: Nilsen, Dahmer, Gacy, Fred and Rose, Brady and Hindley, Sutcliffe, Manson, Corll, Bittaker and Norris, Eyler, the list goes on, and on..

I hope this helps,

-Dan

[danyulx]

We also had, and have perhaps forgotten, the Camden Ripper (lived near me, no idea what his name is without googling) and that twat who put bombs in gay pubs, possibly called Colin Ireland.

You're confusing Colin Ireland with David Copeland. Both twats, in slightly different ways. Almost all serial killers and mass murderers are twats.. there's not an awful lot more to most of them than that.

I hold a deep sympathy for both Jeffrey Dahmer and Dennis Nilsen though. Especially Dahmer.  As much them as I do their victims.. if not more so. Neither were sadists by any stretch.. both just had very severe screws loose. I can easily understand their going down the road they did: them being alive as human beings on this particular planet. It makes sense if anything. I identify very strongly with the both of them, on all counts except their acts of murder. A few false moves and I could've ended there with them though, probably, I reckon. I recognise at least "the seed" of whatever caused them to do what they did.

[Serge]

and that twat who put bombs in gay pubs, possibly called Colin Ireland.

Colin Ireland was the guy who set out to become a serial killer by targeting gay men and killing them in their homes. He died quite recently. The bomber was a completely different guy, whose name escapes me (googles it)....David Copeland, apparently. He had tried to target Brixton and Brick Lane before the Old Compton Street bomb. EDIT: As danyulx says above. I was working on Charing Cross Road when the bomb in the Admiral Duncan went off.

This is probably the time to mention that I've just decided to re-read Philip Sugden's Jack The Ripper book, so maybe I should change my avatar to that picture of David Sowerbutts.

[thenoise]

Richard Driscoll's infamous dvds are escaping from their special thread in movies.  'Fihona Louise' doesn't exactly convince as a name either.  Is it as gloriously dreadful as I would hope?

[Dead kate moss]

You're confusing Colin Ireland with David Copeland.

So I am - and it turns out Ireland died last month, yay!
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-17117441

[danyulx]

Richard Driscoll's infamous dvds are escaping from their special thread in movies.  'Fihona Louise' doesn't exactly convince as a name either.  Is it as gloriously dreadful as I would hope?

You could be right there. For reasons I won't go into I've been attempting to track her down for the best part of the last six months now with no joy in sight. I've pretty much emailed and phoned every sod called "Fhiona Louise" in the country. And I'm sick of it.

It's the only film she made and she was 21 years of age when she made it. Which all sounds a bit suspicious.

It's not half bad actually: looks like it had a budget of around £150 but its heart's in the right place.. I bought a VHS copy on ebay years ago for a fortune. Then it got released on DVD last month by some obscure horror DVD label who'd clearly just converted the VHS (they'd bought on ebay too) to DVD.

[Gurke and Hare]

Sending a Turd to the Queen.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/dh73/5479453811/lightbox/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/dh73/5479452669/lightbox/

[Glebe]

The Beverly Hills laundry story remains an all-time favourite. I should probably scan it...

[NoSleep]

[Benway]

The Tony Parsehole-penned tribute to Whitney Houston in this month's Viz is nearly indistinguishable from the real thing. The main difference being that the Viz one is better written!

[NattyDread]

The Tony Parsehole-penned tribute to Whitney Houston in this month's Viz is nearly indistinguishable from the real thing. The main difference being that the Viz one is better written!

Jings! That's a belter. He only forgot to list the b-sides really. Some excellent comments in there too.

Was very tickled at Iggy Pop's real name being revealed as

Spoiler alert

'Igloo Population'

[close]

in the latest one. The missus didn't think it warranted the near hyperventilation mind you.

[Dusty Gozongas]

A recent one from the Top Tips Facebook page:

LIB DEMS. Following the end of the NHS you can always ask your Tory chums for a sub to pay for your testicular implant surgery.

[rudi]

Was very tickled at Iggy Pop's real name being revealed as

Spoiler alert

'Igloo Population'

[close]

in the latest one. The missus didn't think it warranted the near hyperventilation mind you.

I shared your hilarity. The only solution is to beat your gf to within a country mile of her life.

[Morrison Lard]

The main prizes were t-shirts, illustrated with a simple white t-shirt saying 'viz competition winner' or somesuch, implying the real prize would be a bit more special than this.

I must have spotted enough characters, as when it arrived, this is exactly what it said. Both completely brilliant, and unwearable.

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Viz-Limited-Edition-Runners-Up-T-Shirt-comedy-memorabilia-/160777946013

Also, Desert Island Desk was one of my all-time favourites, I'll find/scan/upload them later if anyone wants em.
I think they did 3 in all.

[Morrison Lard]

[Custard]

Love the Tony Parsehole columns. I've even taken to ending tweets, blog posts, texts, and private thoughts with "there, 500 words. Invoice enc."

[An Actual Propeller]

I've just remembered one of my favourite Roger Mellies.  Tom asks him whether he wants to do a voiceover for a cereal commericial, and Roger replies "I don't think much of the name though, Tom. How about Fuckabix?"