Savile Documentary

[Jemble Fred]

Lesbian couple Cosmo and Dibs roasted me with strap-ons. :'(

[biggytitbo]

Mr Noseybonk made me sit on his face :-{

[Hangthebuggers]

Mr Noseybonk made me shit on his face :-{

Fixed it for you.

[haveachocolatebiscuit]

He-Man made me his She-Man.

[monkfromhavana]

Optimus Prime fired his energon cubes into my poop shoot.

[biggytitbo]

Metal Mickey did something unspeakable to me whilst Irene Handl frigged herself silly in the corner.

A true conspiracy of silence. Between man[nb] Technically Irene Handl was a woman[/nb] and machine.

[Blumf]

He-Man made me his She-Man.

Did it involve Fisto?

[haveachocolatebiscuit]

You can't blame Mr Mickey. He was only operating on instructions fed to him via punched tape. This goes deeper than the mechanoid. Far deeper.

[haveachocolatebiscuit]

Did it involve Fisto?

Christ. I am now having flashbacks of something my unconcsious has buried all these years.

[TrenterPercenter]

I naively agreed to a spit-roast with Zig 'n' Zag

[Mr_Simnock]

I was subject to an hour of 'obedience' and 'training' by the care bears when I was ten. I have worn Kanga pads ever since due to the ten pin skittle used during the ordeal.

[haveachocolatebiscuit]

Can it be proven that the BBC created a paedophile robot programmed to endear kids and help Sir Jimmy Savile in his insatiable lust for their destruction? I don't see why not.

[haveachocolatebiscuit]

At the age of nine I was persuaded to try Gummiberry Juice on the fun sounding promise that it would 'make me bounce like a kangaroo'.

I woke up two days later with arse pain and the feeling that something had gone wrong.

[Hangthebuggers]

Timmy Mallet got his bat out.

[George Oscar Bluth II]

Muffin the Mule made me piss on him.

[Mr_Simnock]

When I was 12 Bodger and Badger dolled me up in a rubber suit in the BBC basement. If I didn't hum the theme tune of black beauty in reverse exactly my breathing was controlled by badger while Bodger smacked my arse with a Richard Stilgoe LP. After that I wasnt alowed free till I whistled the them tune of Beat the teacher while the Great Soprendo face sat me.

[Mr_Simnock]

When I was 7 Terry Nutkins made me mimic the Clangers while riding a sybian.

[Gradual Decline]

PC McGarry left me for dead by the A452.

[biggytitbo]

Evil Edna made me twiddle her nobs :/

[boki]

Wizbit had managed to get himself about a third of the way up me before an anxious minder finally forced him to heed my pleas for mercy.  The rat bastard.

[non capisco]

Zippy made me stand for hours holding heavy weights on a little chair in his garden in just my pants, he claimed 'for research'.

WHEN'S THE BOOK COMING OUT, ZIPPY?!!! WHEN'S THE FUCKING BOOK OUT?! OH, GODDDDD!

[haveachocolatebiscuit]

Fenella the Kettle Witch forced herself on me, smelling strongly of alcohol.

The initial shock was bad, but it was actually quite nice once it got going.

[Glebe]

These allegations are only the start of it. The BBC cover up, were you are part of it? Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba...

[haveachocolatebiscuit]

Aged 6 I woke up in the middle of the night worried that I'd pooed myself, but it was one of The Flumps crawling out of my bumhole.

[non capisco]

Roy Castle once offered to give me a rusty trombone in a cupboard but on that occasion he was just attempting to offload a deteriorated brass instrument.

[Clatty McCutcheon]

Trampy from The Shoe People enveloped me in his leathery folds during one of his nature rambles but P.C. Boot helped him cover it all up.

[Dead kate moss]

The Round Window from Play School told me he had some sweets for me, but then Morph and Incy & Wincy the spiders from Paper-Play tied me up before Mr Bump came in and held me down then that living pantomime horse off Rentaghost came in and made me fondle its bollocks. They said if I told anyone nobody would believe me.

[monkfromhavana]

Ted Rogers repeatedly used his signature "3-2-1" hand gesture on my penis til i shot my bolt into Dusty Bin.

[Mr Eggs]

I raped several Poddington Peas, masturbated Cheep off Orm And Cheep (Against his will) and have a restraining order (ending soon) against Greenclaws.

Monster. I am one.

[TrenterPercenter]

The Krankies..............oh wait