Author Topic: Inept film posters  (Read 59792 times)

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #540 on: January 05, 2019, 06:29:11 PM »
An Apache doesn’t even have wings. It’s a helicopter. Those little stubby things are weapons pylons. It should have been called blades of the apache.

They’ve had to put all the Apache AH-64 attack helicopters *exactly* front-on (including a silhouette of one right in the actual title text), to hammer home the point that the stubby sponsors that cradle the auto-cannons are “wings” because look, ahh do you not see, wings, ahhhh.

It was renamed “Fire Birds” for US (?) distribution, so presumably common sense crashed their party shortly after initial release.


St_Eddie

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #541 on: January 06, 2019, 08:03:28 PM »
Fuckin' misogynist.

Fucking chromosomes have ruined me, yet again!

batwings

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #542 on: January 07, 2019, 06:06:31 PM »
An Apache doesn’t even have wings. It’s a helicopter. Those little stubby things are weapons pylons. It should have been called blades of the apache.

Well, technically a helicopter's blades are wings, hence the term rotary wing aircraft. I doubt the producers had that in mind though.

Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #543 on: January 15, 2019, 03:42:50 PM »

Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #544 on: February 10, 2019, 08:30:21 PM »
This film poster is just funny. No one involved in making this poster gives a shit about the film it's for.


Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #545 on: February 10, 2019, 08:56:41 PM »
This film poster is just funny. No one involved in making this poster gives a shit about the film it's for.



Nice to see Elbow's Guy Garvey getting some acting work.

BlodwynPig

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #546 on: February 10, 2019, 09:00:21 PM »
Advert for lipstick?

Dex Sawash

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #547 on: February 10, 2019, 09:11:13 PM »

Never heard of Ryan Guzman

BlodwynPig

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #548 on: February 10, 2019, 09:15:24 PM »
Never heard of Ryan Guzman

Ratio of Guzman to Modine to Stallone in film

99:0.9:0.1

Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #549 on: February 10, 2019, 11:07:28 PM »
This film poster is just funny. No one involved in making this poster gives a shit about the film it's for.



Music composed by Tom Jones more like.

BlodwynPig

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #550 on: February 10, 2019, 11:30:26 PM »

mothman

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #551 on: February 10, 2019, 11:55:18 PM »
This film poster is just funny. No one involved in making this poster gives a shit about the film it's for.



Jay Leno gets his face but not his name on the poster?

samadriel

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #552 on: February 11, 2019, 03:18:27 AM »
Oo, Matthew AND Modine.

Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #553 on: February 11, 2019, 03:19:30 AM »
Jay Leno gets his face but not his name on the poster?

Brilliant. Stallone has clearly been told about the films existence for the first time.

Driving along with your mates, playing some tunes, "what's this one?"
"Backtrace original motion picture soundtrack, let's give it a whirl"

"Didn't they make a film based on this?"

Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #554 on: March 26, 2019, 10:37:31 AM »
The Bombing - Watch Bruce Willis look constipated... in a WAR ZONE!!!!


St_Eddie

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #555 on: March 26, 2019, 11:29:39 AM »
Adrien Brody there, looking peeved at the guy just out of shot, smoking and inconsiderably flicking embers in his and Willis' direction.

Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #556 on: March 26, 2019, 11:33:43 AM »
Adrian Brody and Bruce Willis must be due a film also starring John Cusack.

Dex Sawash

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #557 on: March 26, 2019, 11:39:47 AM »
Adrien Brody there, looking peeved at the guy just out of shot, smoking and inconsiderably flicking embers in his and Willis' direction.

"Can we get a minute? Bumming here"

Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #558 on: March 26, 2019, 07:18:44 PM »
Never heard of Ryan Guzman

He was great in Drove.

mothman

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #559 on: March 26, 2019, 09:43:32 PM »
"Can we get a minute? Bumming here"

There's definitely a reach-around happening, and neither of them are happy with its execution.

icehaven

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #560 on: March 27, 2019, 08:34:13 AM »
The Bombing - Watch Bruce Willis look constipated... in a WAR ZONE!!!!



If you cut it so they aren't there it's much better. This is also probably true of the film.

buzby

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #561 on: March 27, 2019, 09:10:43 AM »
The Bombing - Watch Bruce Willis look constipated... in a WAR ZONE!!!!


Everything about that poster is wrong. It's presumably based on the Bombing of Chongqing by the Japanese, which started in 1938 (the film is apparently set in 1940, but the opening of the film shows the first raid happening in 1937). The planes on the poster are Vought F4U Corsairs, which were only released to squadron service in 1942 (in the film the American Volunteer Group pilots in the CAF are shown flying the Curtiss P40 Warhawk, which is correct for the period).

Willis' character is loosely based on General Claire Lee Chennault, the commander of the AVG. He never had a beard, and it was against the USAAF regulations to grow one.

It changed title to Air Strike for the US market, but the posteer isn't much better:

Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #562 on: March 27, 2019, 09:17:57 AM »
And another. Something tells me the pilots on the right and left aren't in the film.


buzby

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #563 on: March 27, 2019, 01:46:04 PM »
And another. Something tells me the pilots on the right and left aren't in the film.

There's a P51C 'Razorback' Mustang (which the ROCAF never got until 1945) blowing the wing off a Spitfire Mk9 on that one!

St_Eddie

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #564 on: March 27, 2019, 04:14:38 PM »
And another. Something tells me the pilots on the right and left aren't in the film.



That poster makes it look like Birdemic: Shock and Terror.

Something tells me the pilots on the right and left aren't in the film.

I love the one on the right in particular.  I can imagine him slowly emerging into view, from behind the shoulder of Seung-Heon Song, accompanied by a slide whistle, saying "hello!" and slowly lowering himself out of view again, as the slide whistle goes back down in tone.

Glebe

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #565 on: March 27, 2019, 05:46:30 PM »
Adrian Brody's face in that The Bombing poster... "what have I gotten myself into?!"

Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #566 on: March 27, 2019, 06:09:31 PM »
Adrian Brody's face in that The Bombing poster... "what have I gotten myself into?!"
First poster is presumably on the first day of shooting.

Second poster: heavy depression after first week.

Third poster: composing note to agent with general gist of "I blame you for everything" before throwing self off cliff.

Glebe

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #567 on: March 27, 2019, 06:37:58 PM »
It'd be great if Bruce Willis had a contract that stipulated that Adrien Brody should be in every film he does from now on, and must appear on the poster looking devastated.

mothman

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Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #568 on: March 27, 2019, 09:14:28 PM »
It'd be great if Bruce Willis had a contract that stipulated that Adrien Brody should be in every film he does from now on, and must appear on the poster looking devastated.

First thought: what could Brody have possibly to him to deserve that?!
Second thought: Kevin Smith dodged a bullet.

Re: Inept film posters
« Reply #569 on: March 27, 2019, 10:10:56 PM »
However, I do like the fact they at least managed to get Brody to make three distinct expressions, while giving the designer just the single Willis scowl to work with.