Author Topic: The worst song you've ever heard  (Read 33195 times)

Kane Jones

  • Member
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  • I want to see your 27 fingers explode in my body
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #90 on: June 20, 2013, 02:23:31 PM »
Right up your street, by your own admission.

Damn.  It should've been 'thick cunts'.  Or 'idiots' even.  Can I go back and edit my post, or shall we just pretend this never happened?


*NEW PAGE CUNTERY*

mcbpete

  • No hat.
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #91 on: June 20, 2013, 02:58:02 PM »
Seen this tweeted quite a bit but I couldn't see it featured here - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unRldLdllZ8
(I can't get the chorus out of my head)

WesterlyWinds

  • Gigalithine Lenticular Entity
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #92 on: June 20, 2013, 03:05:03 PM »
I was really hoping for him to commit suicide half-way through that video. Disappointing.

BlodwynPig

  • Throwing two dogs at a goblin
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #93 on: June 20, 2013, 03:06:07 PM »
I was really hoping for him to commit suicide half-way through that video. Disappointing.

It's a good track. Perhaps what "Let it Be" could have been if it had been written across the Lancashire border.

WesterlyWinds

  • Gigalithine Lenticular Entity
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #94 on: June 20, 2013, 03:07:53 PM »
His other songs are of the same astounding quality, too. I especially love his original and irregular syllabic lyrical structure.

Presumably he knows deep down that he is shit and just likes the attention? Or do you think he genuinely things he has talent?

the psyche intangible

  • and other vacating medicines
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #95 on: June 20, 2013, 04:25:33 PM »
Seen this tweeted quite a bit but I couldn't see it featured here - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unRldLdllZ8
(I can't get the chorus out of my head)

Jesus off a spring board, That one wins for me. It's not even funny.

the psyche intangible

  • and other vacating medicines
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #96 on: June 20, 2013, 04:31:44 PM »
His other songs are of the same astounding quality, too. I especially love his original and irregular syllabic lyrical structure.

Presumably he knows deep down that he is shit and just likes the attention? Or do you think he genuinely things he has talent?

He looks like he means it, looks like he's feeling whatever that music is and I predict he may kill himself. Seems he was bullied at school which is probably nothing compared to the shit he should get for that daft song.

Petey Pate

  • Currently Not Available
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #97 on: June 20, 2013, 07:22:34 PM »
Here's Deadmau5 recreating BEP's Time (Dirty Bit) in less than 5 minutes.  Not difficult, especially when they sampled one of his drum patterns.  The two note synth line could have been created by a five year old on a fisher price keyboard.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sh2giDlkc_w

The lyrics and vocals are just as half arsed, if not more so.  All of their songs follow the same flow and rhyming pattern, like this sort of nonsensical shit I just pulled out of my arse:

I'm rich like Rockefeller
Magic like Penn and Teller
My record is best seller
I am the finest fella
Great at music like Ella
Michael Jackson and Fela
We should be together
Cause you have nice smell-a
WE. ARE. HAVING. FUN FUN FUN FUN

Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #98 on: June 20, 2013, 08:24:37 PM »
I'm rich like Rockefeller
Magic like Penn and Teller
My record is best seller
I am the finest fella
Great at music like Ella
Michael Jackson and Fela
We should be together
Cause you have nice smell-a
WE. ARE. HAVING. FUN FUN FUN FUN

Give this man a record deal.

chand

  • "like Louise Mensch but with a sexy beard"
    • https://twitter.com/RopesToInfinity
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #99 on: June 20, 2013, 08:56:44 PM »
Yes he does, Black Eyed Peas were nothing special even before Fergie, a poor man's J5 been kind, but since then its just been horrible, although I still think I Got A Feeling is their ultimate monstrosity.

The weirdest thing about watching old BEP videos is the reminder that there are actually three dudes. Those other two are actually still in the group, but fucked if anyone knows what they do any more. I imagine they swing wildly between deep existential angst and mopping up their jizz with $100 bills.

BEP weren't exactly hardcore before 'Where Is The Love?', kind of a Dilated Peoples lite, but it is odd to rewatch something like BEP Empire (the video of which is a dig at the commodification and inanity of modern hip-hop © all 90s/00s 'conscious rappers' everywhere) in the light of the deliberately stoopid club shit they do now. "Money is a drug and MCs is on it" indeed. Whenever I hear them these days I'm dragged back to that relentlessly horrible time a few years ago when everyone in the world loved ringtones and all music was designed to make a cool ringtone and ad breaks were wall-to-wall exhortations from Jamster to accidentally subscribe to their financially crippling ringtone scam and consequently they'd hit you with clips from 'Babycakes' every 30 seconds.

chand

  • "like Louise Mensch but with a sexy beard"
    • https://twitter.com/RopesToInfinity
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #100 on: June 20, 2013, 08:59:27 PM »
His other songs are of the same astounding quality, too. I especially love his original and irregular syllabic lyrical structure.

Presumably he knows deep down that he is shit and just likes the attention? Or do you think he genuinely things he has talent?

Weirdly though if you put him in a studio with a big producer and Autotune that could easily pass for some kind of jarring 'reflective' penultimate song off a Soulja Boy album.

Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #101 on: June 23, 2013, 12:37:34 PM »
Stupid "Sailor went to sea sea sea" song they keep playing on ads for a show on Quest. Makes me want to punch something.

WesterlyWinds

  • Gigalithine Lenticular Entity
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #102 on: June 23, 2013, 01:55:12 PM »
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2zkjQVh5KmQ

My English teacher used to play this on an endless loop in year 9 lessons. Horrific.

Chriddof

  • Things start to happen!
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #103 on: June 23, 2013, 09:06:38 PM »
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2zkjQVh5KmQ

My English teacher used to play this on an endless loop in year 9 lessons. Horrific.

This version is good, though:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nKKv8hcFBRM

For my own nomination, it can't be any other song but "Wonderful Baby" by Don McLean. My dad loved this piece of mawkish shit. It was on a Don McLean best of he bought, and would play it in the car where I couldn't escape its Disney-esque horrors. Worse than "American Pie" IMO. Here it is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8I5aSjQuCzo

Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #104 on: June 23, 2013, 11:08:13 PM »
Has anyone heard Uri Geller's self-titled album from the 70s?  It's pretty hard to get hold of, but it can be downloaded from a few very niche blogspotters. 

It is, predictably, fucking awful, and nobody really knows why or how it got made.  Unfortunately my personal favourite 'Come On And Love' isn't available on YouTube, but here's another contender:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XJUtH0A-QQ

Just yesterday, my friend discovered that he also (inexplicably) did a version of the album in Japanese, some of which are available on YouTube:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q_-Nf8xmC8Q

Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #105 on: June 23, 2013, 11:32:39 PM »
This seems like as good a place as any to ask this.

There was a similar thread started some time back, where people were asked to nominate particularly horrible songs that had no redeeming qualities whatsoever.  I can't remember the name of the original thread title, but it was all about "ugly" music, basically.

Anyway, one of the songs that was nominated was some horrendous euro-dance effort (sounded something along the lines of Scooter but it wasn't them) where the song was basically some European arsehole briefly rapping about getting a girl to "suck my fucking dick" or something similar, with electronic trancey bleeps and blurps all over the place, and included the sounds of a woman gagging.

Any ideas what that one might've been? Can't remember who posted about it at the time.  Seem to recall it might have been Nags but not sure.

It just suddenly popped into my head the other day, and I was curious to give it another listen.

Spiteface

  • a jump to the sky turns to a rider kick.
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #106 on: June 24, 2013, 12:46:01 PM »
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5NV6Rdv1a3I

Come at me bro

For ages I'd been hearing this shitfeast on the radio and had no idea who it was by. Now I know. Should have known it had Pharrell CUNT Williams' stench all over it.

Anyway, I don't believe this has been mentioned, and it damn well should be:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jMCMlNyySvo

Don_Preston

  • You should have bought me the truck, you fuck!
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #107 on: June 24, 2013, 01:03:11 PM »
One for the Terrible Album Covers:


Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #108 on: June 25, 2013, 12:42:53 PM »
I'm not sure if this is the worst song or the best.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ONDjjzsuCkQ

Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #109 on: June 25, 2013, 12:47:10 PM »
either way, it's the first link on this page.

GET IT TOGETHER MATE.

Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #110 on: June 25, 2013, 01:14:08 PM »
either way, it's the first link on this page.

GET IT TOGETHER MATE.

Oops, apologies. I didn't have time to read all the previous posts as I am currently busy writing a monograph on pencil sharpeners. Also, your use of caps  was helpful - it clearly symbolized the error of my lazy ways.

Borboski

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Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #111 on: June 29, 2013, 09:41:38 PM »
Kill the thread, War is Over by Speak.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=--Vaz9jW054



BIZNUTS.

WesterlyWinds

  • Gigalithine Lenticular Entity
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #112 on: June 30, 2013, 10:39:30 AM »
I quite enjoyed that. It was like watching an innocent overgrown child perform a song/'rap' they had written.

Marissa

  • Team Paglia. Fuck Foucault
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #113 on: June 30, 2013, 07:45:00 PM »
Pete Burns and m to f Trans person Lauren Harris (once was bogus bow tied child prodigy on Wogan etc) murdering Spin Me Right Round, both nowhere near the melody, some quite old men in underpants dancing along, on Big Brother's Bit on the Side is quite incredible. Copyright holders removed it from youtube, maybe it's somewhere else? Not
as bad as the Brixton Sax Busker but still  excruciating.

Blue Jam

  • AM NO A GRASS
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #114 on: July 01, 2013, 08:26:58 PM »
And to conclude, the lass who listened to Fergie and thought " I can make worst music than that" Nicki Minaj

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6j4f8cHBIM

I don't know- that's almost avant garde.

Has anyone mentioned Chuggo's AWWWW, COME ON FUCKIN' FUCK A GUY yet? The video is the whole pakage: the lyrics, the production, the cheap greenscreen effects... just beautiful:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZPeHk4WMWpY

If we've got room for bad videos then Dieter Gold's Boom Base Alpha deserves a mention. Check out the subtle phallic imagery here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FgDpFyN1xZs

mcbpete

  • No hat.
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #115 on: July 01, 2013, 08:38:00 PM »
Reminds me of the faster sections of Lady Sovereign's Public Warning - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c4jTW-B_ZYY

Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #116 on: July 06, 2013, 11:29:40 AM »
That Minaj thing is clearly supposed to be funny/quirky as well as a pop song. So it's on two levels.

Both of them fucking SHIT.

Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #117 on: July 06, 2013, 12:00:49 PM »
That Minaj thing is clearly supposed to be funny/quirky as well as a pop song. So it's on two levels.

Both of them fucking SHIT.

One thing I will say though, I've felt more warmly towards Nicki Minaj since Lawrence of Felt / Go-Kart Mozart was going on about how great he thinks she is, but he kept calling her Nicki Minja.

ThisIsHardcore

  • What exactly do you do for an encore?
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #118 on: July 06, 2013, 05:54:31 PM »
Feast your ears on this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T3-JUsif944

Musically, it's not too bad, but those lyrics. Good God.

Subtle Mocking

  • fuck off
Re: The worst song you've ever heard
« Reply #119 on: July 06, 2013, 05:55:31 PM »
It's horrific musically too.