Trick or treat?

[303]

[checkoutgirl]

You monster!!

[BlodwynPig]

Next stop: Sex Offenders Register

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Trick or treaters should be hit hard in the head for their trick, and then buried in a sileage dump in Belarus for their treat.

[madhair60]

Last time I had trick or treaters I answered the door finishing off a massive bag of Starmix, and told the kids that if they egged my house I'd beat the shit out of them.

[Pijlstaart]

I won't be at home for halloween, so I won't have to deal with trick-or-treaters. I'll be at a party, dressed as a sexy crayon.

[presta didwicks]

[shiftwork2]

I was hoping to snag a few last year.  I even had the cage fitted.  Unfortunately round my way kids won't knock unless you've got a pumpkin out on your doorstep.  You can imagine how embarrassed I was.

[Sexton Brackets Drugbust]

This attitude only works if you've got teenage trick or treaters. When it's four year olds dressed up like vampires and fairy princesses, forced into tolerated begging by their self proclaimed 'yummy mummy's who lurk in the shadows while their terrified offspring nervously stutter the titular legend, you don't really impress anyone.

[El Unicornio, mang]

Last time I had trick or treaters I answered the door finishing off

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

I am scared of people misconstruing me giving small children sweets with the actions of a predatory paedophile so to counteract this on Halloween I always kick the shit out of them, leaving no-one under any misapprehension.

I also send photos to the police just to prevent ending up on one of those lists of theirs.

[Olarrio]

I simply have my kitchen knife handy(er than usual).

[Small Man Big Horse]

I am scared of people misconstruing me giving small children sweets with the actions of a predatory paedophile so to counteract this on Halloween I always kick the shit out of them, leaving no-one under any misapprehension.

I also send photos to the police just to prevent ending up on one of those lists of theirs.

Once when I was trick or treating with friends our next door neighbour invited us all in to his lounge, and made us listen to a long boring story before giving us sweets. It's weird to think, was he just an overly friendly type? Or a child sex fiend? We shall just never know.

Halloween's one of those times where I love living on the third floor of a building, right opposite a police station. Only one person has ever rung the doorbell in the eleven years I've lived here, and everyone ignored it. No one's having any of my chocolate. Ever.

[Ambient Sheep]

Once when I was trick or treating with friends our next door neighbour invited us all in to his lounge, and made us listen to a long boring story before giving us sweets. It's weird to think, was he just an overly friendly type? Or a child sex fiend? We shall just never know.

Now you're making me feel REALLY old, given that trick or treating was unknown over here until I was well into my 20s...

...does the maths...

...um, just how old WERE you when you were doing this, SMBH?!

[Small Man Big Horse]

Um, probably some when between 8 to 11 I'd guess at, so it would have been between 1982 and 1985. I'm still bitter that I wasn't allowed to go out after that due to being too old, I could have crouched under a sheet and no one would have known...

[Vodka Margarine]

I was never allowed to go trick-or-treating round my 'hood. Lots of old people lived in the area back then and it was deemed inappropriate by my folks if we went around unsupervised, lest we frighten some poor old dear into cardiac arrest. But I wasn't having that at all, so I ended up never doing it at all because it just wasn't worth the trouble. It was a bone of contention when I was 11 as I insisted me and my mate knew which doorbells not to press (we blatantly didn't), but in hindsight they were absolutely right and I was being an arrogant, self righteous little prick about it all.

Nowadays virtually every trick-or-treat group you see doing the rounds has one or several assorted parent / guardians with them, and usually dressed up as well for crying out loud. Almost as if it's their idea and they're the ones who are enthusiastic about it all. Plus it always starts some time in early to middle of October because it's one huge long festival now. Fuck massively and entirely off.

[Blue Jam]

I suspect most people here will have a Halloween like this one:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RfNl9fcJtM

[Catalogue Trousers]

Or this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6K518NKsZzs

WATCH THE MAGIC PUMPKIN, KIDDIES!