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101 live music clichés you lap up like a dog/detest

Started by doppelkorn, January 31, 2014, 02:36:11 PM

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doppelkorn

1. Saving their only hit as an encore

"Thank you thank you you've been a great audience! A bing-bing, a-bing-bing, a-bing-bing, a-bing-bing, a-bing-bing, a-bing-bing, a-bing-bing, Her name is Noelle, I have a dream about her..."

2. Solo swapping/battling.

Especially when done with two different instruments such as guitar vs. sax or scratch DJ vs. drummer.

3. Introducing the band before the last chorus of the last song where each member gets a little twiddle during the long groove.

"And on bass and painkillers tonight...t-ta...tst t-ta...we have Mr. Kenwood O'Keefe!

Bow biddley bow b-bow biddley ba bowwwwwwwwwwwwbum

Crowd: *Whoooooooooo!*"

4. The rhythm guitarist gets to do one of his

Quick! The bar's quiet.

5. HIP HOP ONLY: the fucking hype man

LANDAN are you ready to make some noise for TALIB KWELI

whoo

NAH NAH NAH YOU GOT TO DO BETTER THAN THAN LANDAN I SAID ARE YOU READY FOR TALIB KWELI?!!!

WHOOOO

Now you go.

Don_Preston

6. Musicians walking around the stage sharing jokes with each other.

7. Over-long song introductions.

Years ago I saw the two-man Who, and Townsend went on for about ten minutes talking about the first time he injected heroin and how it made him feel.

8. Hey Jude

stunted

Hype men usually means the lead doesn't have the stage presence to come out and get things going themselves. You wouldn't get Chuck D pulling that shit,[nb]Actually he might I don't know.[/nb] you want the main event to be out shouting like fuck from the start.

doppelkorn

Quote from: stunted on January 31, 2014, 02:49:27 PM
You wouldn't get Chuck D pulling that shit

I don't think I've ever seen a hip hop act without pointless fucking hype men and I've seen a hell of a lot of hip hop acts. I don't think the Beastie Boys had one but that was late in their career and they played instruments for a lot of it.

Usually it's just some bloke trying to tie the whole thing together. It's all this call and response shit that I loved when I was 15 then by the time I was 17 felt it was wearing a bit thin.

Say hoh-oh!

Hoh-oh!

Say Ho! Ho!

Ho! Ho!

Don_Preston


doppelkorn

10. FREEBIRD![nb]Don't think I've ever heard this[/nb]

11. Phones in the air cos we don't smoke


HappyTree

I generally feel tired of encores. They have now become obligatory. Like, ok we're done. "No you're not." Just do the show then leave. An encore is supposed to be done when the audience simply will not accept the act has finished, so they come back and play a song they've already done, again. Like again = encore. Do it again. Not "save songs for the bit where we pretend we're so great we have to do an encore".

Another similar one is the standing ovation. Again, this is supposed to mark exceptional talent and appreciation. Not just "some cunt has stood up, I guess we all have to now."

No.

This became particularly apparent at Christmas when I went to see the town orchestra play some very easy listening Estonian songs. Just bland, banal. Orchestras should play classical music, not get the piano player to use a crap synth on a couple of songs to try to sound with it. At least get him a real Fender Rhodes or something.

Then after this banalfest with an audience atmosphere colder than the winter night outside, people all just started standing up. One of the most perfunctory ovations I've ever witnessed.

I took great pleasure in remaining seated. I will stand if I agree it was amazing, thank-you.

stunted

Quote from: doppelkorn on January 31, 2014, 02:56:27 PM
I don't think I've ever seen a hip hop act without pointless fucking hype men and I've seen a hell of a lot of hip hop acts. I don't think the Beastie Boys had one but that was late in their career and they played instruments for a lot of it.

Usually it's just some bloke trying to tie the whole thing together. It's all this call and response shit that I loved when I was 15 then by the time I was 17 felt it was wearing a bit thin.

Say hoh-oh!

Hoh-oh!

Say Ho! Ho!

Ho! Ho!

Ced Gee essentially acted as the hype man when I saw Ultramgnetic MCs and that was ideal. The call and response can work to get things going but when it isn't a seamless transition into the music, you're usually just waiting for them to get on with it. When I saw Madlib the hype man had to keep coming back out because everyone was so bored, that might be colouring my judgement somewhat.

glitch

Quote from: stunted on January 31, 2014, 02:49:27 PM
Hype men usually means the lead doesn't have the stage presence to come out and get things going themselves. You wouldn't get Chuck D pulling that shit,[nb]Actually he might I don't know.[/nb] you want the main event to be out shouting like fuck from the start.

Isn't Flava Flav supposed to be the hype man for PE?

stunted

12 WAN MORE TUNE[nb]for readers in Glasgow[nb]Last gig I was at a someone who was keen to be noticed was shouting this mid-set which made it sound like they wanted the show to end.[/nb][/nb]

stunted

Quote from: glitch on January 31, 2014, 03:35:23 PM
Isn't Flava Flav supposed to be the hype man for PE?
I haven't seen them live but I assumed either him or Chuck D would do it which is why I think most acts shouldn't need one when they can do it themselves.

doppelkorn


stunted

Probably best we disregard my posts here, I don't even know what I'm trying to say any more. I think in my head it didn't count as a hype man if the hype man was part of the act themselves rather than someone who had been brought along to emcee.

doppelkorn

Ah. It can be either. I'd say the latter is by far worse though.

CaledonianGonzo

Flavor Flav has to do something to keep himself occupied inbetween beating up women, so he might as well say "Yeah boy!" rather than do anything else to stir up trouble.

CaledonianGonzo

Quote from: stunted on January 31, 2014, 03:36:43 PM
12 WAN MORE TUNE[nb]for readers in Glasgow[nb]Last gig I was at a someone who was keen to be noticed was shouting this mid-set which made it sound like they wanted the show to end.[/nb][/nb]

Don't really mind that at all.  It's 'music' to my ears compared with:

"Here We!  Here We!"

madhair60

13. Stopping singing and playing for a bit so the audience can fill it in

stunted

Quote from: CaledonianGonzo on January 31, 2014, 04:12:08 PM
Don't really mind that at all.  It's 'music' to my ears compared with:

"Here We!  Here We!"
Don't have anything against it but it has become a gig cliché and shouting it mid-gig doesn't make much sense to me. Where do you stand on "Let's go! Let's  go fuckin mental!"?

doppelkorn

Quote from: madhair60 on January 31, 2014, 04:16:27 PM
13. Stopping singing and playing for a bit so the audience can fill it in

That's number one in my bag of Cheesy Wedding DJ Tricks to Dazzle Pissed People.

Taking bookings for 2014 folks!

Hmmm, meta game where we try to guess if you love or detest these things?

CaledonianGonzo

Quote from: stunted on January 31, 2014, 04:18:25 PM
Where do you stand on "Let's go! Let's go fckin mental!"?

I seem to move in circles where it doesn't crop up much. 

Likewise the 'Slam Tent Chant', but it did rear up its head a couple of times last year - namely at The Reflektors and Tame Impala.

Thomas

Okay, yeah, perhaps it's a bit square, especially as I'm a should-be-hip-happening thin-legged guy in his early twenties, but I'm not bothered about going to gigs. I get a bit bored. Is this song not finished yet?

Too hot, too many people, me teetering awkwardly. I don't sing or jump along. I mean, I'm not actually Mark Corrigan, but that's how it makes me feel. Maybe I'd enjoy them more if I was seated. I'll go along with HappyTree and we can complain about the various conventions of live music together.

doppelkorn

Quote from: Steve Lampkins on January 31, 2014, 04:21:01 PM
Hmmm, meta game where we try to guess if you love or detest these things?

I originally only had "lap up like a dog" but then put the hype man in and had to add "/detest" to the thread title.

Serge

Quote from: HappyTree on January 31, 2014, 03:04:43 PMI generally feel tired of encores. They have now become obligatory. Like, ok we're done. "No you're not." Just do the show then leave. An encore is supposed to be done when the audience simply will not accept the act has finished, so they come back and play a song they've already done, again. Like again = encore. Do it again. Not "save songs for the bit where we pretend we're so great we have to do an encore".

An act I couldn't possibly name played at the shop once and planned an encore as part of the set (not usual, as instore sets are usually a lot shorter than a full gig.) He overestimated the loyalty of his fanbase however, as the second he walked offstage, 90% of the audience started making for the door, causing him to stumble back onstage and shout, "Hey! Anyone want an encore?" before the shop emptied. A contrast with someone like Wilko Johnson who people genuinely want to come back onstage.

Brundle-Fly

Quote from: Don_Preston on January 31, 2014, 02:41:22 PM
6. Musicians walking around the stage sharing jokes with each other.

7. Over-long song introductions.


I do get fed up with audiences who laugh sycophantically at any utterance the frontman makes. I once saw Elvis Costello on a solo acoustic tour and a plant audience member shouted, "Where's the band?", and Costello put his hand in his pocket and flicked a rubber band into the crowd. It brought the house down.

14) Lead singer goading the audience about how well their football team is doing this season.

I'm looking at you, Terry Hall.

SteveDave

Quote from: Serge on January 31, 2014, 04:27:04 PM
An act I couldn't possibly name played at the shop once and planned an encore as part of the set (not usual, as instore sets are usually a lot shorter than a full gig.) He overestimated the loyalty of his fanbase however, as the second he walked offstage, 90% of the audience started making for the door, causing him to stumble back onstage and shout, "Hey! Anyone want an encore?" before the shop emptied. A contrast with someone like Wilko Johnson who people genuinely want to come back onstage.

Name & shame please. Was it Beady Eye?

Famous Mortimer


Petey Pate

15) Any variation of the following song introductions/patter between not playing your bloody instruments:
"This one's for the ladies out there"
"This next one is totally mad, we want to see you all jump up and down to it"
"Hey man this is like our next tune it's like totally bullshit man" (being 'ironic')

16) Doing this joke:
"Hey lads what key should we play in next?"
"Eh?"
"That'll do!"

babyshambler

Quote from: Brundle-Fly on January 31, 2014, 04:38:57 PM
I do get fed up with audiences who laugh sycophantically at any utterance the frontman makes. I once saw Elvis Costello on a solo acoustic tour and a plant audience member shouted, "Where's the band?", and Costello put his hand in his pocket and flicked a rubber band into the crowd. It brought the house down.

14) Lead singer goading the audience about how well their football team is doing this season.

I'm looking at you, Terry Hall.

lol, not any more.

NoSleep

Quote from: doppelkorn on January 31, 2014, 02:36:11 PM

5. HIP HOP ONLY: the fucking hype man

LANDAN are you ready to make some noise for TALIB KWELI

whoo

NAH NAH NAH YOU GOT TO DO BETTER THAN THAN LANDAN I SAID ARE YOU READY FOR TALIB KWELI?!!!

WHOOOO

Now you go.

James Brown had a hype man. It was hype.

The original Hip Hop DJs (the first heroes of Hip Hop) had a hype man, a Master of Ceremonies if you will, or "M.C." we could shorten it to. It was only when the record companies were looking for a front man that these MCs became the focus of attention. So now the MC has an MC, too.