Is there a shitter, more smug band name...

[imitationleather]

The best name by some distance is The Fall. All the bands following this should give up and start naming themselves Band #1848485 or whatever in numerical order.

[Johnny Yesno]

The best name by some distance is The Fall. All the bands following this should give up and start naming themselves Band #1848485 or whatever in numerical order.

Agreed, although it can be a bit difficult to understand when someone says it:

http://youtu.be/-7Lw9xbwXWQ?t=12m48s

[Morrison Lard]

That'd work, right up until band number 5318008

[momatt]

I can't think of anything smugger than calling your band - The Music.

[Glebe]

To be honest, I like the way that little snippet of 'that song they have' has been used for BBC2's Glasto coverage. Soars joyously in the summer bumness.

[Phil_A]

My default answer for this has always been "Does It Offend You, Yeah?" The kind of name that immediately suggests a bunch of obnoxious wankers before you've even heard a second of their actual music. Spoiler:

Spoiler alert

They are.

[close]

Also: "Scouting For Girls".

[clingfilm portent]

Does It Offend You Yeah is really fucking obnoxious.

Less obnoxious is Actress, but it still is one dull fuck of a name for a solo artist

[Clatty McCutcheon]

I still have an EP somewhere by 90s Noo Yoik garage rock types Jonathan Fire*Eater (some of whom later became The Walkmen).  Not sure this has ever been surpassed in the shite band name stakes - and no-one to my knowledge has ever copied their pointless asterix gimmick.

Runners up would probably be Portugal, The Man and One Lady Owner (baffling Creation signing by Alan McGee during the late 90s 'meltdown' years).

[hedgehog90]

This year's Glasto line-up was rife with these smug wanky band names. Here's just a few:

The 1975
Bombay Bicycle Club
The Internet
London Grammar
The Brian Jonestown Massacre
The English National Ballet[nb]This one's so wanky they don't even play guitars![/nb]

[JesusAndYourBush]

and no-one to my knowledge has ever copied their pointless asterix gimmick.

B*Witched

[olliebean]

Hear'say.

That fucking apostrophe.

[Jijifranko]

I still have an EP somewhere by 90s Noo Yoik garage rock types Jonathan Fire*Eater (some of whom later became The Walkmen).  Not sure this has ever been surpassed in the shite band name stakes - and no-one to my knowledge has ever copied their pointless asterix gimmick.

There's been at least one other band.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Crowder_Band

David Crowder Band (stylized as David Crowder*Band and The David Crowder*Band) was a six-piece Christian rock and modern worship band from Waco, Texas.

The band's name is usually rendered with an asterisk, as "David Crowder*Band". In a faux-documentary, while recording Church Music, Crowder joked that the asterisk meant, "David Crowder [is about to go insane because Jack Parker continually tries to sabotage the work of the rest of the] band."

[Rolf Lundgren]

My default answer for this has always been "Does It Offend You, Yeah?" The kind of name that immediately suggests a bunch of obnoxious wankers before you've even heard a second of their actual music. Spoiler:

Spoiler alert

They are.

[close]

It's taken from The Office, Brent says something along the lines of "My drinking. Does it offend you yeah?". Makes it better or worse depending on who you are.

[Puce Moment]

Some excellent cunty bands and their cunty names, and I would add:

¡Forward, Russia!

Natalie Portman's Shaved Head

[elnombre]

David Gilmour Girls

[imitationleather]

¡Forward, Russia!

I liked their music a lot but the terrible name and the fact they all wore t-shirts with their logo on them when they played live (oh my days) made it a troubled relationship.

[Jijifranko]

Natalie Portman's Shaved Head

That exists?! *checks last.fm* Ha! I rather like that one, though I agree that, objectively (papal infallibility and all that), it's a bit cunty.[nb]Calling things cunty is rich coming from me. I enjoy the novelty in some of these names.[/nb] Too much of a mouthful, perhaps?[nb]It's strange that I object to this inconsistently. 'Oneohtrix Point Never', 'Half Man, Half Biscuit' and 'Godspeed You! Black Emperor' are fine, but I feel that, in a conversation, it would be awkward for me to say 'Natalie Portman's Shaved Head', 'Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin' or 'Does It Offend You, Yeah?' in full. They're not names you'd want to repeat too often.[/nb] The same goes for this one: Monkey Swallows the Universe.

[Van Dammage]

Isn't there a band called "The Band"?

[Jijifranko]

Isn't there a band called "The Band"?

Yes. Brilliant musicians and their first two albums (Music from Big Pink and The Band) are wonderful. Scorcese directed a film about their "farewell concert" (with appearances from Bob Dylan, Joni Mitchell, Van Morrison, Neil Diamond, Emmylou Harris, and more besides): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Last_Waltz. Check out some of the performances on YouTube, or buy the DVD. It's great!

[imitationleather]

That exists?! *checks last.fm* Ha! I rather like that one, though I agree that, objectively (papal infallibility and all that), it's a bit cunty.[nb]Calling things cunty is rich coming from me. I enjoy the novelty in some of these names.[/nb] Too much of a mouthful, perhaps?[nb]It's strange that I object to this inconsistently. 'Oneohtrix Point Never', 'Half Man, Half Biscuit' and 'Godspeed You! Black Emperor' are fine, but I feel that, in a conversation, it would be awkward for me to say 'Natalie Portman's Shaved Head', 'Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin' or 'Does It Offend You, Yeah?' in full. Maybe it's because names like 'Half Man, Half Biscuit' have a more comfortable, more natural, or more 'musical', rhythm for speech?[/nb] The same goes for this one: Monkey Swallows the Universe.

On a similar note, I think Atari Teenage Riot (while I love them) is just trying too hard. I like a sense of arrogance in me band names, and that is trying really hard to impress me. I don't like being impressed! I guess the fact they're not English makes it okay, though.

A band name I really like: Polysics.

[imitationleather]

Oh yeah, The United States of America is a very poor name. But, again, I love their tunes.

[Van Dammage]

Yes. Brilliant musicians and their first two albums (Music from Big Pink and The Band) are wonderful. Scorcese directed a film about their "farewell concert" (with appearances from Bob Dylan, Joni Mitchell, Van Morrison, Neil Diamond, Emmylou Harris, and more besides): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Last_Waltz. Check out some of the performances on YouTube, or buy the DVD. It's great!

I remember coming across The Last Waltz while looking for a song that was on the Oldboy Soundtrack.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

"Does It Offend You, Yeah?"

[gmoney]

The The. Though try searching them on Soulseek. Maybe they were ahead of the game.

[ndrwkrtn]

Less obnoxious is Actress, but it still is one dull fuck of a name for a solo artist

Not that the subject of the thread is dull artist names, but I disagree entirely that 'Actress' is a bad name! That's one of those where I go 'dang, I wish I could have thought of that.' Though I am pretty dull fucker so maybe you have a point after all..

[Johnny Textface]

Editors. Strictly no definite article. Cuntish.

[Mark Steels Stockbroker]

Ok I take smug back. I meant twatty. It just sounds a bit pleased with itself, y'know?

No more than "Echo & The Bunnymen" or "The Teardrop Explodes".

[Mark Steels Stockbroker]

The best name by some distance is The Fall. All the bands following this should give up and start naming themselves Band #1848485 or whatever in numerical order.

Apart from The Smiths, who had the 2nd greatest name.

[Mark Steels Stockbroker]

The thing with "Atari Teenage Riot" is that even in 1993 it was built around a dated reference. Which is a problem if your schtick is that you're the zeitgeist-surfing new wave cutting edge of whatever.

[Retinend]

I can add the somewhat obscure:

"The Miserable Rich"
"You Can't Win, Charlie Brown"
"And so I Watch you From Afar"

And though there're not exactly smug, I find it very annoying when people pick as their stage names words that exist and change them slightly:

"Grimes"
"Grouper"