Tip jar

If you like CaB and wish to support it, you can use PayPal or KoFi. Thank you, and I hope you continue to enjoy the site - Neil.

Buy Me a Coffee at ko-fi.com

Support CaB

Recent

Welcome to Cook'd and Bomb'd. Please login or sign up.

March 28, 2024, 10:20:26 PM

Login with username, password and session length

The 'Ive nothing of worth to say' Thread

Started by TotalNightmare, February 12, 2004, 11:47:34 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Frinky

Quote from: "Lady Beany"Anyway, to compensate I plan on sitting about in my pants tonight, scratching my arse and eating potato waffles.

Make implications as to the correlation between his age and his sexual perfomance, and recant tales of young, sweaty and hard studs, who had degrees in romance. Tell him at this rate he'll be dead soon and you'll have years to fiddle with younger, better men, that'll sort him out.

NEVER FOLLOW MY ADVICE.

morgs

Quote from: "Hairy Chin"Cuh - no cards today and no bugger on my MSN contact list to chat with. You know I'm very tempted to switch this computer off, go outside and do something.

Totally agree... but it's dark and I can't be arsed frankly.  Will go and lie in the bath, that'll waste half an hour or so.  Surely there must be some other MSN bastards out there tonight?  They can't ALL have lives can they??

Lady Beany

Quote from: "Frinky"[
Make implications as to the correlation between his age and his sexual perfomance, and recant tales of young, sweaty and hard studs, who had degrees in romance. Tell him at this rate he'll be dead soon and you'll have years to fiddle with younger, better men, that'll sort him out.

NEVER FOLLOW MY ADVICE.

No, I like that.  I want to make him cry and that sounds perfect!

Hairy Chin

Lady Beany's misery has cheered me up.

Not like that - I only take pleasure at other people's misfortune when something simple happens, like they fall down or walk into a lamppost or something.

What's cheered me up is that I could go make some potato waffles to give me something to do. Plus I'm hungry - two birds, one stone. Well, three if you count the one what did gived me the idea.

I'm sure there's usually some good telly on tonight.

TraceyQ

Yay! Valentine's night and we have Hairy Chin and Lady Bean eating waffles in  their pants. It's a beautiful image and one I will carry with me throughout the evening as I eat a chinese takeaway wearing pyjamas and a cardie with a bit of yogurt the front and belching loudly as I drink cheap lager straight from the can.

Lady Beany

Tracey my dear, you are indeed a lady after my own heart.  The waffles were great Hairy Chin, even better if you have them with a couple of sausages.

A couple of beers and a windy bottom is all I need now to guarantee me with a comfy night.

Hairy Chin

Sorry ladies - I was too lazy to even cook waffles.

I just made a microwave toastie and pizza. Oh, and I've got a 'comedy' beer from xmas 'Digeridoo Beer', which came with a little ozzie hat on the top of the bottle, and a rucksack holding a small bottle of teachers whiskey and a thin shotglass. Made in Stoke. Nice authentic Ozzie brew then.

And for the record I'm not wearing pants. As I've been milling round the house since this afternoon I changed out of my suit and shirt (I looked fucking dapper, aye) and slung on some jeans, a fleecy jumper and my slippers i got for xmas.

Cheers m'dears *raises bottle* chin-chin.

gazzyk1ns

Quote from: "Lady Beany"
Quote from: "gazzyk1ns"Lady Bean, how come you go out with someone nearly twice your age? Nothing wrong with it, just thought there might be an interesting story there.

Errr he isn't quite twice my age.  There are 9 yrs between us, which I guess is a significant amount to most people.  

No, hold on a minute, you're not 25. I remember when you signed up as Sabrina the Teenage Wench, you said you were 17/18/19, I think one of the "younger" years there. What's going on, Sab?

Smackhead Kangaroo


Gazeuse

Can I just say that I'm older than Beany's feller and not only did I remember valentines day, I cooked a romantic meal complete with canapes, fizz and heart shaped garlic bread.

It can be done!!!

fanny splendid

Quote from: "Gazeuse"and heart shaped garlic bread.

Saturday Morning Kitchen; Jamie Oliver.

Gazeuse

Quote from: "fanny splendid"
Quote from: "Gazeuse"and heart shaped garlic bread.

Saturday Morning Kitchen; Jamie Oliver.

I've been making them since before he was invented.

fanny splendid

Well, technically, he didn't make it. his chummy Italian (old) friend made the thing.

It did look very nice, though. So...

If you're not doing anything next year Gaz, will you be my, food cooking, valentine?

Gazeuse

Quote from: "fanny splendid"Well, technically, he didn't make it. his chummy Italian (old) friend made the thing.

It did look very nice, though. So...

If you're not doing anything next year Gaz, will you be my, food cooking, valentine?

Ah, the mighty Gennaro Contaldo.

As for being your cooking valentine, I'm afraid *Puts finger on chin and blushes fetchingly* I'm taken.

Vermschneid Mehearties

Just removed 3 cocking porn diallers from my computer (Memo- Don't go on porn then, you thick fuck). Even worse when I've got broadband, and I don't think they can do anything. What scares me more is that if they can reach my pc so easily, then I'm sure any virus in exitence can. So it's quite miraculous that the PC is as yet unaffected.

Oh, and as another pointless piece, if just got myself a brand new girlfriend, spawned from a valentines day night on the town. And I'm just being really annoying about it, so ignore me.

Incredible Monkey Doctor

Quote from: "Purple Tentacle"IMD claims he never argues with his girlfriend, which is frankly abnormal.

Anybody who never argues is just saving up for a stabby-stabby killfrenzy.

It's true. We're just two damn nice people who get along well.

Eitehr that or she's so evil I can't even see it, which is a possibility I must consider.

Just read the 'THIS MUCH I DO KNOW` interview in the Observer Mag. For those of you that arn`t familiar with it, it is basically just a list of statements or truths that relate to that persons life/experiences. This week it is with a 83 year old trainspotter called Ian Allen.

First statement:

"Trainspotting is an innocent pursuit. We only ever had one criminal case, I think, involving an older 'Locospotters Club` member interfering with younger chaps. The sight and sound of a steam locomotive in full cry was normally excitement enough for everyone in trousers, short or long."

Benny J. Fish

MILLWALL ARE IN THE QUARTER FINALS!!!

Who's yo' daddy muthafukwa?

TraceyQ

I was just cleaning an old makeup bag out, 'cos I was going to chuck it in the bin. Once I'd removed all the lipliners and cuticle cream I found a dead wasp. My question is this: Does anyone want a load of lightly used make up? No. No it's not. It's "Can dead wasps still sting?"

Benny J. Fish

Go on. Dug out my old Manics albums a couple of days ago, and I'm in the mood for camping it up again at our next gig!

Frinky

I hate Sundays almost as much as they hate me. If I never post on here again, it means I'm dead, and I want you all to have a selection of your favourite tipples (or nipples, if the chance arises) in celebration.

mr rou-rou

Quote from: "kenneth trousers"Just read the 'THIS MUCH I DO KNOW` interview in the Observer Mag. For those of you that arn`t familiar with it, it is basically just a list of statements or truths that relate to that persons life/experiences. This week it is with a 83 year old trainspotter called Ian Allen.

First statement:

"Trainspotting is an innocent pursuit. We only ever had one criminal case, I think, involving an older 'Locospotters Club` member interfering with younger chaps. The sight and sound of a steam locomotive in full cry was normally excitement enough for everyone in trousers, short or long."

spot on Kenny, always something to ponder over or chuckle at in that column.
http://tinyurl.com/2xx9y

Dr. Gizmonic

I just realized how depressing it is that my highest ambition is to become an English teacher to a group of GCSE brats in a comprehensive school.

I mean, how can my University beg money off me if I'm earning less than £30,000 a year? I'll be the most disappointing graduate they'll have ever had.

fanny splendid

Quote from: "Dr. Gizmonic"I just realized how depressing it is that my highest ambition is to become an English teacher to a group of GCSE brats in a comprehensive school.

I mean, how can my University beg money off me if I'm earning less than £30,000 a year? I'll be the most disappointing graduate they'll have ever had.

Ha ha ha ha, £30,000?

More like £18,500.

Ambient Sheep

Quote from: "kenneth trousers""Trainspotting is an innocent pursuit. We only ever had one criminal case, I think, involving an older 'Locospotters Club` member interfering with younger chaps. The sight and sound of a steam locomotive in full cry was normally excitement enough for everyone in trousers, short or long."
For any other curious readers, the whole article can be found here.

Apart from his tales of trying to cross the third rail with a tin leg I found this bit linguistically interesting:
QuoteTrainspotters weren't always thought of as anoraks. They were quite respectable in the Forties, Fifties and Sixties...
I find this intriguing because the word "anorak", meaning a certain type of overcoat, only acquired its secondary (now almost primary) meaning of "sad obsessive nerd" due to the fact that said garments were primarily worn by...trainspotters.

How circular.

TotalNightmare

well,

my valentines day was spent with a bunch of mates watching Horror Flicks as part of our 1st Annual Valentines Day Massacre.

we watched Monster Squad and then The Frighteners as a chosen double bill.
One for pure monster 80s value and The Frighteners because its Peter Jackson and its a fucking marvellous film that more people should stand up for.

And we had a little smoking, drinking, eating and then to top it off towards nightnight time, we stuck on a Family Guy dvd...

Thats what i did, thats what i did alright!

And then tonight, its fucking Catterick. So i is a happy bunny with a large carrot and a full pack of smokes!

Hairy Chin

I'm not happy.


Am I the first person to say "that is all" on the new board?


PS
Sorry for thievery, EFB

Frinky

I get to play with these tomorrow:



I've still got a fucking hairy back, though.

Dr. Gizmonic

Quote from: "fanny splendid"
Quote from: "Dr. Gizmonic"I just realized how depressing it is that my highest ambition is to become an English teacher to a group of GCSE brats in a comprehensive school.

I mean, how can my University beg money off me if I'm earning less than £30,000 a year? I'll be the most disappointing graduate they'll have ever had.

Ha ha ha ha, £30,000?

More like £18,500.

I think you'll find that, yes, £18,500 is lower than £30,000. I was speaking of the fact that the average cambridge graduate earns around £35,000.

Ambient Sheep

Quote from: "Hairy Chin"I'm not happy.
Why not cheer yourself up by coming along and listening to The Compendium and indeed DJ Ro (on air as I type) at http://www.thebridgewalsall.co.uk?  Some of us might even be in their chatroom right NOW, just waiting to talk to YOU on 09806 5050...ahem.

Or would that be too much like a busman's holiday?