Lyrics You Misheard.

[Camp Tramp]

Often I mishear the words in a song and what I have come up with in my brain, is much better than the reality

For Example

"Dude Looked Like a Lady" by Aerosmith was "Do Me Like A Lady" in my head

"Try Me Out" by Corona was "Tie Me Up"

"Invisible Touch" by Phil Collins was "Physical Tuckshop"

What songs have you misheard in your head?

[Jockice]

Pretenders' Brass In Pocket. Chrissie sings: "Got new skank, so reet. Got something, I'm winking at you."

What my adolescent brain translated it as: "Got moussecake, it's allreet. Got something, and when can I chew?"

[Puce Moment]

Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds Deanna

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FxORulyOXs8

At 0:38 for many years I thought he was singing "I cum whilst dancing in your frock" which I thought was genius.

Then I found out he was singing "I cum a death's head in your frock" which is more sinister, and less funny, but equally brilliant.

[Brundle-Fly]

For ages I thought the opening line of UB40's Food For Thought was not "Ivory Madonna" but "I'm a prima donna" which would have been far more apt considering Ali Campbell's behaviour over the years.

[non capisco]

Finally it has happened to me, right in front of my face, monkey lips can't describe it.

[non capisco]

I thought for ages the chorus of Elvis Costello's 'Battered Old Bird' was 'He's a battered old bird and he's living in bedevilled love' which I really liked and fit in with the unrequited agony theme of a lot of the rest of the album. Turns out it's 'He's a battered old bird and he's living up there, oh woah'. Oh woah?!! Pull your finger out, Declan. I just pretend it's what I thought it was now.

[ogio]

Beastie Boys: Intergalactic.

I often wondered why they kept singing 'Leonardo da Vinci" but the lyric sheet informed me it was actually 'Another Dimension'.

Still sounds like 'Leonardo da Vinci'.

[non capisco]

^ Blue Jam of these quarters once pointed out that bit on Intergalactic sounded like the robot voice was saying 'I'm having a nice shit, I'm having a nice shit' and I've never been able to hear it as anything else since.

[Treguard of Dunshelm]

I heard it the other day and thought it said "I have an erection."

[Puce Moment]

I heard it as "they're laughing at you, kill them all, kill them to hell."

[Natnar]

in Madonna's Dress You Up i always thought she was singing "All your suits are custom made and laundered" but the line is actually "All your suits are custom made in London".

[garbed_attic]

My lover's got no money, he's got his stromboline

(presumably a kind of musical instrument-cum-trampoline)

[Mr Banlon]

La Isla Bonita by Madonna. I thought the opening line was, "Last night I dreamt of some dago." I really did think it was that. The video had loads of Hispanic people in it, so I thought Madonna was referring to them. There's also a line that sounds like "Young girl with eyes like potaters" I'm sure that's not the right lyric. But life is to fucking short to bother looking up anything to do with Madonna.
In 1985 I had an old bootleg hip hop tape of OC and The Great Peso live. OC says the line, "Two of the Fearless Four." Referring to the fact that he and Peso, were indeed two members of the Fearless Four. For years I thought he said, "Two in a field, is four." I dunno, I thought he was making a statement like 'A bird in the hand, is worth two in a bush.' Fuck knows why I thought a New York MC was making a random 'country wisdom' type observation in the middle of a rap.

[Captain Poodle Basher]

A mate of mine insisted that A Tribe Called Quest's "I Left My Wallet in El Segundo" was really "I Left My Wallet in a House of Ganja." I think I prefer his version.

Thanks to a scratchy vinyl LP of The Velvet Underground and Nico, for years I thought Lou Reed referenced Joy Division in Venus In Furs - "Ermine furs adorn Ian Curtis" and wondered which one of them had access to a time machine. My money was on Lou, as The Factory was full of all sorts of oddball weirdos so you'd never know.

[steveh]

Prodigy, Out of Space: "I take your brain to another dimension. They closed the kitchen."

[Hypodeemic Nerdle]

http://rateyourmusic.com/list/Dr_Keloid/me_ears_are_alight/

[the midnight watch baboon]

Inconsequential daytime MOR fave of its time, Sewn by the Feeling I had down pat as having the line "you've got my auntie in a headlock" in among the nothingness. Which is a bit more hilarz, obv xxx

[wosl]

Giving Up by Tram:

Heard: "You're running out of them...skin cells."
Actual: "You're running out of excuses (ex...cuuuses)"

Prefer the mishearing, and still sing it.  There's also a Cocteau's song[nb]Edit: Summerhead[/nb] where Liz sounds as though she's singing "Flat back four and Lois Lane," but since Cocteau's lyrics are a load of gibberish anyway, that might be a correctly heard one.

[thraxx]

Roses in the Hospital, just before the "we don't want your fucking love" bit.

Actual:  Like a leave in the autumn breeze, like a flood - in January.
Heard:  Like a leave in the autumn breeze, like a cock – up Keanu Reeves.

[Norton Canes]

"Take me down to the very nice city, where the grass is green, where the girls are pretty..."

[hedgehog90]

'You're not alone' by Olive I would sing along to as 'banana load'
I was 6 or 7 at the time. My brother used to make me sing it when there was company, and I loved that song so I would give it my all,
"BANANA LOAD - WAIT TIL THE END OF TIME..."
It took me a while to work out the actual lyrics, probably cos I was singing my little heart out every time it came on the radio.
Great song.

[checkoutgirl]

Travis - Why Does It Always Rain On Me?

"Why does it always rain on me, it is because I lied when I was seventeen?"

to me was

"Why does it always rain on me, is it because I like a bit of sympatee (sympathy)"

Roxette - Church of Your Heart

"I believed in the church of your heart"

to my mate sounded like

"I believe in Jo Jo Gohaar"

He thought there was a woman called Jo Jo Gohaar. He was probably thinking of Zsa Zsa Gabor.

House of Pain - On Point

"When it's time to rock a funky joint, I'm on point"

to another mate became

"When it's time to rock a funky jory, I'm all horny"

To this day I do not know what a funky jory is.

[checkoutgirl]

R.E.M. - The Sidewinder Sleeps Tonite

"Come and eat your bacon up, come and eat your bacon up, come and eat your bacon up, come and eat your bacon up"

etc...

[Panbaams]

Cutting Crew: "(I Just) Died In Your Arms"
I just died in your arms tonight
It must have been something I ate

Dire Straits: "Money For Nothing"
You've got the features of a microwave oven

[DrunkCountry]

Enemy sighted, enemy met are the correct words in REM's Exhuming McCarthy. For years I heard them as getting excited, getting wet — not a sexy wet, instead a reference to race rioting & being water hosed by police.

[TheMonk]

"There's one thing you gotta do,
to make me still want you,
Gotta stop steppin' on her"

[Natnar]

Yazoo - Only You
"All i needed was to love you gay"

[thraxx]

R.E.M. - The Sidewinder Sleeps Tonite

"Come and eat your bacon up, come and eat your bacon up, come and eat your bacon up, come and eat your bacon up"

etc...

I always heard that as "Cutting Cheryl Baker's hair, Cutting Cheryl Baker's hair, Cutting Cheryl Baker's hair, Cutting Cheryl Baker's hair, oohhhh"

[Chriddof]

I genuinely thought that Stipe was singing "Calling Tammy Bakker, oh..." which I assumed was an oblique reference to the Jim & Tammy Faye Bakker scandal of a few years previously.

[Thomas]

For a long time, I misremembered one line from Carly Simon's Nobody Does It Better.

Actual:

The way that you hold me
Whenever you hold me
There's some kind of magic inside you
That keeps me from running
But just keep it coming
How'd you learn to do the things you do?

My misremembered double entendre version:

The way that you hold me
Whenever you hold me
There's some kind of magic inside you
That keeps me from running
But just keeps me coming
How'd you learn to do the things you do?

Misheard, in a way.