Twattish aftershave and perfume

[Ray Travez]

It was designed by Antoine Lie, who makes loads of scents.

http://www.nstperfume.com/perfumers-l-to-s/antoine-lie/

I've just checked and they sell it in a few places in town, as well as the opulent palace of shite that is the Trafford Centre. I'm going to check it out sometime in the next week...

[TheFalconMalteser]

I actually really like Cool Water by Davidoff, but I understand that's some sort of really adolescent teenagers aftershave?  Well. I like it.

[Nice Relaxing Poo]

I wear this and anyone who doesn't is a ruddy poofter. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

[Urinal Cake]

I actually really like Cool Water by Davidoff, but I understand that's some sort of really adolescent teenagers aftershave?  Well. I like it.

[Jim_MacLaine]

I always return to..

[Stoneage Dinosaurs]

I've got some nice soap.

[shiftwork2]

Brilliant idea for a thread, and nicely timed for those distress purchases for the failing relationship.  Let's examine some past candidates.

For the women we've got Charlie, which my ex, as late as 1998, expressed a liking for. Here's a woman from the 1970s who's going to be accepting a length later this evening because she's wearing Charlie.  Kinda wow.  It's made by Revlon, one of the foremost generic North American perfume manufacturers.  Nothing on Lentheric though.  What is?  Here's Panache, by Lentheric.  It costs a little more, but give her something special as clearly orgasms or a reason to live appear to be beyond you.  Alternatively, for a lass who's probably not going to do the things you want, consider Tweed, by Lentheric.  It's the finishing touch.  Should be called Regret.  But it isn't.

For the fellas, let's start with Brut 33.  Decades before 'homoerotic' was even a word we have Barry Sheene sitting astride his pocket rocket, then Henry invites himself into the trailer gurning for England watching Barry rub after shave over his tits.  There's a bit of banter before Henry's cock is most definitely blocked by Barry's 'girlfriend'.  The look of sorrow on Henry's face.  Back home for an angry wank 'enry.  Tame stuff though compared to the aggressive eroticism of Denim, by Faberge.  Christ on a bike.  Makes Christmas go with a bang, if you're in The Sweeney.  Further fingernails dragged through hairy chests in this Santa follow-up.  For the man who doesn't have to try too hard.  He just buys his after shave from Woolies.

[Birdie]

I have in the past worn Charlie, Panache AND Tweed, not to mention Blasé.  Currently wearing White Linen by Estee Lauder.   Old fashioned maybe but then so am I.

If we're going 70s scents, then an honourable mention to Blue Stratos.  Couldn't bear it myself as it made me sneeze but I'm sure it was very popular with the Portsmouth skates at the discotheques.

[Cerys]

I'm convinced this is is made by and for utter cunts

Or just badly-equipped wankers, by the look of it.

[Bhazor]

Just squeeze the head and squirt all over your chest and face. Then put on some aftershave.

[Pseudopath]

Wonderwood by Comme des Garcons is my current 'perfume'.

Great stuff. It's basically liquid forest in a bottle. Here's my current pong which is like a mix of Wonderwood and Tropicana Orange Juice:

[Benway]

Great stuff. It's basically liquid forest in a bottle. Here's my current pong which is like a mix of Wonderwood and Tropicana Orange Juice:

I'm a fan of Terre D'Hermes too. It's fairly versatile and works all year round for me.

This design is pretty stupid. I recall reading about someone having a difficult time at airport security after a bottle of this was found in his case.

[Foggy Buntwhistle]

Oh, it's whisky.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Hahaha. I was coming here to post that exact thing.

Haig Club?
Not a cunt?
Well I'm afraid you'll have to turn around and go somewhere else.

That only leaves me with this to contribute:



The smell of Channing Tatum fucking you in the dark.

Actually- it probably is.

[Brunette Romana 2]

I wear this and anyone who doesn't is a ruddy poofter. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Aaah, my Dad used to wear that! Makes me all nostalgic!

One side of modern life that I just don't get is aftershaves and perfumes. I can't wear it; neither can any partner of mine. My asthma forbids it.  It's a shame, but it can't be helped. So, as a result I am bemused by the whole sorry industry.

Um, so, there you go. I'll fuck off out of this thread then...

[buttgammon]

Tom Ford for Men can't cure baldness or phimosis but it would probably reduce the bachelor count by 50% if people on this forum started using it.

This. I tried some in Brown Thomas the other week and felt like a (particularly fragrant) dripping testosterone statue for a few hours. As for my regular, that would be Paco Rabanne Black XS, which is like having a shower in a citrus grove.

[Mr Banlon]

Eau Sauvage is nice and subtle. It keeps wasps away as well.

[shiftwork2]

A real 'Lost In Translation' feel to those shots. Haig Club is a bit too close to Haig Fund, which appeared on the black plastic bit of November poppies until General Haig's reputation as the butcher of the Somme started to affect charity revenue.

[Hank Venture]

Aqua di Gio forever, you peasants.

I actually got that Diesel thing with the fists for Christmas last year, needless to say it smells as gaudy and MACHO as it looks. Pretty crap.

[Too Many Cochranes]

Fucken get yer Lacoste trainers on, G Star jeans, All Saints carrier bag thickness shirt on, fucken splash on a load of Diesel The Brave and FUCKEN GAN OOT AND TEAR THE TOWN A NEW ARSEHOLE. FUCKEN BE THE FUCKEN MANNNN THIS BOXIN DAY. GET ON THE BASTAD!

This informative post was directed towards Thomas.

[HappyTree]

Brut, or "essence of Christmas past". Vile stuff. It would be consigned to a drawer until the next Christmas, whereupon I'd throw out the old stuff on the Eve and lo and behold get some more from the same granny the next day. Joy to the world!

[Cerys]

I quite like Brut.  I commandeered a can of the stuff that my dad got for Christmas one year and used it up without shame.  Fourteen, I was.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

I bet you smelt musky, rugged and handsome.

[Cerys]

Damn right I did.

[MoonDust]

Orange peel. Roll up in your hands. Rub hands on neck.

Smell of oranges.



_{I've never tried this.}

[Cerys]

And as a bonus effect, you won't be infested with ants.

[MoonDust]

In the event of ants it'll show explicitly your kind nature:

Look at this man/woman. They're supporting a load of tiny creatures selflessly all over their body. They're a kind and gentle person.


I don't believe any other perfume/aftershave can show this about anyone.

[Cerys]

http://www.hometipsworld.com/ants-hate-orange-peel.html

[MoonDust]

Oh cool. I thought you were being sarcastic about the ants comment. Hence my reply implying that you meant the opposite of what you said.

_{I might now try orange peel.}

[Cerys]

Sarcastic?  Moi?