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March 29, 2024, 01:51:32 PM

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black mirror is bad

Started by kittens, December 17, 2014, 09:51:19 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Dusty Gozongas

Quote from: Urinal Cake on December 17, 2014, 09:57:54 PM
Brooker is a hack. Black Mirror is like those sci-fi-horror shows for kids but worse since the usually have better characterization and an overarching story line.

Has Brooker ever made a secret of that though? He knows he's taking the piss and you (cos you're clever) know it too.

[edit] I haven't even read this thread yet so I may have missed some of the ironies. Usually I'd read past the first few posts but there's a good chance that me internet will be cut off as of this morning so fuck it.

kittens

it is made legal to use torrents BUT torrents are now torrents of water that ruin your computer

alcoholic messiah

WHAT IF BEES SHAT OUT BITCOINS INSTEAD OF HONEY?

EH?

MAKES YOU THINK, DUNNIT?


Blumf


kittens

'prince' george gets married to an electronic sex doll and their baby is a USB stick containing the first half of season one of breaking bad

BPFHAY

Terrorists have uploaded everybody's thoughts into the clouds. Data mining shows that every living person has the same opinion about one thing: cherries.

Thomas

A man's pacemaker gets cancer from electronic cigarettes.

BPFHAY

There isn't really France, but everything keeps on working regardless.

Kelvin

For generations, people have been equipped with devices that prevent them moving more than 10 metres away from their computer, or risk dropping to the floor stone dead.

Spoiler alert
The device is a placebo.
[close]


Lord Mandrake

It's the near future, a young couple order some pizza and legal highs using wearable tech like a watch. Their order arrives by drone. They are scanned for contactless payment But the drone malfunctions! It keeps saying "Item not recognised" in a high pitched and slightly annoying voice.

At this point in the story we view events from the drones perspective, hovering just out of reach as the frustrated man trys to swot it out of the air. Soon more drones arrive in response to a distress beacon or something and they join together to form a supradrone which hauls the man off to a sarcastic cashpoint. When he finally gets home he finds his girlfriend dead apparently from natural causes But the autopsy reveals she's had a mindisc player sewn up inside her And it's still playing some haunting downbeat song.

Kelvin

In a society in which everything has been replaced with cold, sterile technology, traditional solutions are now deemed novelties.

Not that blackly comic one might think. But ah! His cock is metallic and he stuffs a detached, organic willy into his wife as foreplay.

It is the only scene that anyone remembers that series.

Thomas

A redundant checkout worker chokes on a 3D screensaver.

Lord Mandrake

Self service checkouts gain consciousness when an old lady types in the wrong code for a red delicious - she put in pink lady. The newly sentient self service checkouts are unable to utilise their new found intelligence because they are largely static so they engage in low level crime like shortchanging pensioners and displaying pictures of carrots even when that's not what's being scanned.

kittens

things seem to be okay, but then through technology it is shown that they aren't

kittens

podcasts turn out to have been a bad idea

kittens

a man double posts on an online comedy forum

Hank Venture

- 4D printing, the fourth dimension being love. But it's very expensive, see, so only rich people feel love while poor people are all cynical and shit.

- Your feelings are stored in the cloud, and the cloud is hacked.

- A podcast bonfire in the city of Dresden

- Computers gain self-awareness, but their personalities consists solely of what is on them. Ian Watkins' computer fucks a USB stick.

kittens

a shit man plays a bad computer game but pretends to love it

Urinal Cake

Quote from: Dusty Gozongas on December 18, 2014, 12:48:30 AM
Has Brooker ever made a secret of that though? He knows he's taking the piss and you (cos you're clever) know it too.

[edit] I haven't even read this thread yet so I may have missed some of the ironies. Usually I'd read past the first few posts but there's a good chance that me internet will be cut off as of this morning so fuck it.
I don't know dude. There was a lot of 'this tell us about our over reliance on technology' commentary and even Stew Lee said something along the lines of, 'the characters in Black Mirror are like out of tv tropes- not that's a criticism of Brooker'. I got the feeling it was Brooker's 'moment'.

Catalogue Trousers

To save a much-loved celebrity's life, the PM has to fuck a pig on national, live television.

But it's a robot pig.

Thomas

A robot grief dog is late for a funeral.

Hank Venture

- You can legally adopt a Tamagotchi.

- Fleshlights are sentient, and require consent

- A Kindle bonfire in the city of Dresden

- Humanity bands together and engineers The Matrix on purpose, to finally rid ourselves of the analog lives we're living

Hank Venture

- Steve Jobs comes down from heaven, furious with humanity for worshipping a Golden Android

- Turns out wikileaks is a prank

Hank Venture

- An iPad bonfire in the city of Dresden

- An Amazon Reader bonfire in the city of Dresden

DukeDeMondo

The Christmas Sainsburys ad takes off around the country, campaigning on behalf of the disenfranchised and dispossessed. A huge following is swiftly amassed, and a violent confrontation on the streets of London seems inevitable. The revolution is thwarted, however, following some intense twitter scrutiny, in the course of which it is revealed that the ad is actually just an embittered TV talent show contestant in disguise. A final televised interview reveals the stunt to be a last grasp at something, anything, meaningful, before the embittered TV talent show contestant succumbs to the effects of the hacking that will soon see the whole of his life uploaded to a football and kicked into the sea. The kicking of the football into the sea becomes the all time most-viewed video on Live Leak.

Shaky

- A small, fat man wakes up to a world where the internet has died but other people's words can be RETWEETED IN REALITY by repeating them out loud (also works for numbers);

- A frustrated musician creates a intelligent, living keyboard which dines on humans. He becomes internationally renowned, but by the end he's just a big toe playing an endlessly droning "C";

- A toaster has a wank, totally ruining breakfast.

Crabwalk

Things are big that should be small.

Jamie Oliver is fat

Quote from: Catalogue Trousers on December 18, 2014, 03:04:07 AM
To save a much-loved celebrity's life, the PM has to fuck a pig on national, live television.

But it's a robot pig.

a robot grief pig.

Kelvin

The magnetic field created by the world's paper clips causes the moon to crash into a windmill.

Sony Walkman Prophecies

I do this post on CAB right, where I do a sort of summary of what might happen in a TV show I don't like? I make up a semi-plausible plot-line, in lieu of writing an entire screenplay, securing funding, sorting out the actors, actually making it good, etc. And because, in this world, everyone is a rejectee of the same BBC writing course, who also believe fantastical TV ended when Sapphire & Steel was overlooked for a 2nd series, all the users of this place think that summary is as good (if not better) than the thing actually made. YEAH, LIKE THAT WOULD HAPPEN!