Author Topic: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!  (Read 11928 times)

Blumf

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #31 on: February 16, 2015, 07:27:47 PM »
Best I could do on this tablet, I'm afraid.


Ballad of Ballard Berkley

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #32 on: February 17, 2015, 12:27:47 AM »
Serafinowicz would love this shit.

Brian Butterfield must surely be partially based on the good captain.

An tSaoi

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #33 on: February 17, 2015, 01:01:32 AM »
I'd say mostly based on this chap: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XoVUs3v5sSk

Ballad of Ballard Berkley

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #34 on: February 17, 2015, 01:08:54 AM »
I don't see the connection, sorry.[nb]Yes, you're absolutely right. But the captain's propensity for listing bizarrely mundane information has probably crept in there too.[/nb]

Oops! Wrong Planet

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #35 on: February 24, 2015, 06:23:54 PM »

Glebe

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #36 on: February 24, 2015, 06:28:42 PM »
Fuck me, now here's something weird... was just telling my brother about these ads the other day - I've been to Jersey several times over the years, twice visiting relatives as a kid and a couple of times visiting my brother when he worked there... anyway my brother once invited me along to a barbeque over there, the guy was an ex-military fellow (not Two-Litre now, don't get too excited), but I recall him actually telling me there was a vacancy available on their cheese counter of the shop he worked in... anyway, my brother reliably informs me that the shop was indeed Benest's!

Can't decide whether to have chip steaks or green streaky for tea tonight... I can be assured that the quality will be superb and the value-for-money per "graham" outstanding, in any case.

oilywater

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #37 on: March 18, 2015, 08:40:14 PM »
The Channel Archive have come up trumps again

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WxcnJ9S0O4c

I have been applying myself with renewed vigour to the challenges of the new video

amnesiac

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #38 on: March 18, 2015, 08:43:27 PM »
hahahahahhahahahahahahah "as memories of 1988 vanish into the mist" absolutely classic. FULL chemist fascilaties, this is my 2nd favourite thread on CaB after the SIlo deaths thing

Blumf

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #39 on: March 18, 2015, 09:14:22 PM »



im barry bethel

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #40 on: March 19, 2015, 05:33:35 PM »
"Benests of Millbrook and Fineprice have become a legend.  Fucking porterage where necessary and NOW OPEN DURING LUNCH HOUR!!,

im barry bethel

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #41 on: March 19, 2015, 05:41:18 PM »
Have we had this one yet?

The Captain's philosophy of retailing...

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=eFOBkK63MsU

mook

  • what a bulb
Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #42 on: March 19, 2015, 05:44:27 PM »
Have we had this one yet?

The Captain's philosophy of retailing...

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=eFOBkK63MsU



haha...
Quote
"wine, the glory of a meal..."

i'm nicking the admiral benfleet or whatever your handle was.

QDRPHNC

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #43 on: March 19, 2015, 05:51:52 PM »
The man himself appears in this one, YOU WILL LOVE THESE FUCKING TOP STAKES

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekPmkicR34Q#t=0

Why... why... why.... why does the man cut the steaks all lovely and them turn them into hamburgers?

mook

  • what a bulb
Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #44 on: March 19, 2015, 05:53:53 PM »
he's the admiral - he did what he liked and liked what he did. cote du rhone -  bottle ¬£2.19

Oops! Wrong Planet

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #45 on: March 20, 2015, 01:13:28 AM »
Have we had this one yet?

The Captain's philosophy of retailing...

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=eFOBkK63MsU

Yes, it's 6 posts up from yours. You're a disgrace to forumkind. 

Glebe

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #46 on: May 29, 2015, 05:13:51 PM »
I love how the mystery deepens with the introduction of that old portrait of the enigmatic 'Founder'. The whole thing is turning into... something like Twin Peaks as written by Alan Moore.

As memories of 1988 vanish into the mists, and the halcyon alternative indie revolution continues, it's reassuring to know that should you fall ill while perusing the excellent traditional meats counter there is a fully-stocked pharmaceutical section to avail off, with sixteen fucking cashpoints - manned at weekends?! *faints*

Glebe

  • Cheers, thanks mate, nice one.
Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #47 on: June 05, 2015, 12:30:01 PM »
I say again... sixteen (count 'em!) cashpoints! Beat that!

I wonder if the Captain will ever get promoted...



"Do not fail me... ADMIRAL Two-Litaaaaar!!!"

QDRPHNC

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #48 on: June 05, 2015, 06:42:05 PM »
"and Fineprlice."

Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #49 on: June 10, 2015, 09:11:07 PM »
Looks like there should be more of the Cap'n on the way as Channel TV are digitising their entire Benest's archive.

(That's a link to a tweet, not a new clip, sadly.)

non capisco

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #50 on: June 10, 2015, 09:40:19 PM »
Fantastic news. I genuinely do love those adverts. They make me nostalgic for a place I've never been.

THE DRUMBEAT OF SUCCESS!

Don_Preston

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #51 on: June 30, 2015, 01:47:45 PM »
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0OYy8ol0sdQ

May as well hawk this. A mash-up of two forum superlatives after about twelve takes.

oilywater

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #52 on: July 09, 2015, 11:29:20 PM »
I take pride and pleasure in making my usual contribution to the spirit of genorosity.

Have a very Benest's Christmas!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SzNJ1btG8rE

Bad Ambassador

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #53 on: July 09, 2015, 11:34:16 PM »
And a Happy New St. Clement's Coast Road!

Glebe

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #54 on: July 10, 2015, 01:45:09 PM »
"The spirit of generosity to which even the meanest heart falls victim, and which a visit to our stores will surely stimulate."

"First class perishables."

"And in particular, a customer atmosphere, congenial to all."

"Whole Tops."

The Channel Archive thing would make great titles for a Blockbusters update.

doppelkorn

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #55 on: July 10, 2015, 11:56:31 PM »
What the hell's a whole top?

Dex Sawash

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #56 on: July 11, 2015, 01:21:43 PM »
What the hell's a whole top?

I think that phrase was used in one of those grindr profile screencaps ddm posted

Blumf

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #57 on: July 15, 2015, 12:50:21 PM »
You might enjoy reading these out in the Captain's voice:


http://liartownusa.tumblr.com/tagged/AppleCabin

Enzo

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #58 on: November 13, 2017, 02:30:25 AM »
Lovely little film from Channel TV archives about our beloved Major

https://twitter.com/ChannelArchive/status/929786399934447617

Dex Sawash

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Re: The Return Of CAPTAIN TWO-LITAAAAAR!!!
« Reply #59 on: November 13, 2017, 03:06:08 AM »
Lovely little film from Channel TV archives about our beloved Major

https://twitter.com/ChannelArchive/status/929786399934447617

That has made me quite content. Karmabomb.