What's the name of the blasted film I'm looking for...?

[Steven]

Eliminators?

Probably this, will have a quick watch later tonight, cheers!

[SteveDave]

There's a late 80s/early 90s film where a group of schoolkids kidnap their teacher & hold him in a bunker. They torture him & then they're all supposed to keep watch of him over the summer but each thinks the other will do it & when they eventually go back he's dead.

Any idea what that would be? We're pretty sure it's a British film.

[billtheburger]

Eliminators?

Eliminators is glorious.
The tank legs he uses are just a hindrance.

[DukeDeMondo]

There's a late 80s/early 90s film where a group of schoolkids kidnap their teacher & hold him in a bunker. They torture him & then they're all supposed to keep watch of him over the summer but each thinks the other will do it & when they eventually go back he's dead.

Any idea what that would be? We're pretty sure it's a British film.

It sounds a bit like both Killing Mr Griffin and Teaching Mrs Tingle, but they're both from the late 90s and neither are British.

[SteveDave]

It sounds a bit like both Killing Mr Griffin and Teaching Mrs Tingle, but they're both from the late 90s and neither are British.

Neither of them apparently. The girlfriend says they were definitely British kids & they wore grey blazers.

[batwings]

Some kid's film from the early 80s about little metallic balls that were aliens or something like that. Or did I dream it?

[gatchamandave]

Some kid's film from the early 80s about little metallic balls that were aliens or something like that. Or did I dream it?

That's the British Film Foundation's The Glitterball and clips were often shown on Screen Test

[batwings]

That's the British Film Foundation's The Glitterball and clips were often shown on Screen Test

That's it. Thanks!

[Chriddof]

There's a late 80s/early 90s film where a group of schoolkids kidnap their teacher & hold him in a bunker. They torture him & then they're all supposed to keep watch of him over the summer but each thinks the other will do it & when they eventually go back he's dead.

Any idea what that would be? We're pretty sure it's a British film.

I think I saw this, or something like it. Late 80s / early 90s, British. Only it was technically a one-off TV drama shown on either BBC1 or 2 rather than a "film" film, if I remember correctly - something under a collective banner like "Play For Today" or something like that. Unfortunately I can't remember the title at all. Some other things I recall that may identify it (if it actually is the right one) - the group of schoolkids were led by this boy whose mother had died (?) and the kidnapping and torturing of the headmaster was the culmination of their activities. They pretended (after attempting to dispose of the body) that the headmaster had been abusing them to throw the police off the scent. There was a scene at the start where said lead boy is waiting until midnight in bed, and it's his birthday, so he immediately opens his presents which are beside him. Also the kidnapping of the headmaster was really ridiculous as it involved tricking him into driving to a field or something, where they all pounced on him, and then the boy inexplicably somehow managed to drive a girl member of his gang back to her home in the headmaster's car.

[SteveDave]

A friend has convinced my girlfriend (it was her who wanted to know) that it was this

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Machine_Gunners

And it wasn't a head teacher but a German fighter pilot.

Your one sounds more like her initial recollection though.

[Peru]

It's not Unman, Wittering and Zigo, is it? Doesn't exactly match your description but closer than what we've got so far?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgnILdAdS74

[SteveDave]

I think I saw this, or something like it. Late 80s / early 90s, British. Only it was technically a one-off TV drama shown on either BBC1 or 2 rather than a "film" film, if I remember correctly - something under a collective banner like "Play For Today" or something like that. Unfortunately I can't remember the title at all. Some other things I recall that may identify it (if it actually is the right one) - the group of schoolkids were led by this boy whose mother had died (?) and the kidnapping and torturing of the headmaster was the culmination of their activities. They pretended (after attempting to dispose of the body) that the headmaster had been abusing them to throw the police off the scent. There was a scene at the start where said lead boy is waiting until midnight in bed, and it's his birthday, so he immediately opens his presents which are beside him. Also the kidnapping of the headmaster was really ridiculous as it involved tricking him into driving to a field or something, where they all pounced on him, and then the boy inexplicably somehow managed to drive a girl member of his gang back to her home in the headmaster's car.

Having spoken to the girlfriend, it appears this ^ is the thing she was thinking of.

[Cerys]

I think it may be The Police.

And here it is on Youtube.

[SteveDave]

I think it may be The Police.

And here it is on Youtube.

Cerys WINS THE INNERNET!

It is that one. Thank you.

[Cerys]

No problem - it turns out that Google continues to be my bitch.

[mothman]

*everyone pauses to consider the ineffable concept that there might be something that ISN'T Cerys' bitch* Nah...

[Cerys]

No comment.

[billtheburger]

I've seen a screenshot in a book once (& possibly the Euroticka TV series) of a plastic (maybe metal) horse cut sideways with a naked woman inside.
I wish to find it & I can't remember it at all.

[another Mr. Lizard]

I've seen a screenshot in a book once (& possibly the Euroticka TV series) of a plastic (maybe metal) horse cut sideways with a naked woman inside.
I wish to find it & I can't remember it at all.

That's Jose Ramon Larraz's VIOLATION OF THE BITCH (1978)

As for the 'Monkey's Paw' adaptation mentioned earlier on, I have a dvd-r of a twenty-minute colour version that was made in 1984 and which I think was broadcast on late-night tv at the time.

[billtheburger]

There it is:


I was worried that my description was too shit or the film was too obscure.

Many, many thanks another Mr. Lizard.

Have you seen it?

[Steven]

That's Jose Ramon Larraz's VIOLATION OF THE BITCH (1978)

Seems a bit like the old Phoenecian Brazen Bull torture device.

As for the 'Monkey's Paw' adaptation mentioned earlier on, I have a dvd-r of a twenty-minute colour version that was made in 1984 and which I think was broadcast on late-night tv at the time.

What was this adaptation though, and was it British? Date seems wrong though, unless it was repeated, I was about 2 in 1984, I'd put it more around 87-88.

[another Mr. Lizard]

Yes I've seen VIOLATION OF THE BITCH. I'm a big fan of Larraz (his movie SYMPTOMS is a REPULSION rip-off that manages to reach the terrifying heights of its obvious source).

THE MONKEY'S PAW? Very little info seems to be available but the 1984 version was a British student short directed by Andrew Barker, screened a couple of times late night by Channel 4. It's highly possible that this aired around 87-88.

[Steven]

THE MONKEY'S PAW? Very little info seems to be available but the 1984 version was a British student short directed by Andrew Barker, screened a couple of times late night by Channel 4. It's highly possible that this aired around 87-88.

Thanks. My memory is very vague but I remember the family being Northern working class, can't remember if it was short or not, but the story isn't very long so it must have been I suppose.

[billtheburger]

Yes I've seen VIOLATION OF THE BITCH. I'm a big fan of Larraz (his movie SYMPTOMS is a REPULSION rip-off that manages to reach the terrifying heights of its obvious source).

I watched his Black Candles t'other night. It was very interesting and had some shocking moments.
Thumbs up from me.

[Steven]

According to the BFI, the Baker Monkey's Paw was made in 1988. Probably the one I'm thinking of then.

Hmm, it's the one I've already seen clips of on youtube, American cast and not at all like the one I remember, if my memory is accurate, ho-hum.

[monkfromhavana]

I might be getting two films mixed up here.

There are a brother and a sister, there mother dies and they either A: enter an incestuous relationship until the authorities come and drag the boy away... or B: the boy has a masturbation habit and does it constantly.

Saw this (these) films in the early/mid 1990s on Channel 4, late at night,

[Talulah, really!]

The Cement Garden?

[monkfromhavana]

That's the one!!! Thanks