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Artists who were naff and stayed naff

Started by ajsmith, June 15, 2015, 05:50:19 PM

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ajsmith

Black Lace
Bombalurina
Total Coelo

others?

Shoulders?-Stomach!


checkoutgirl

Daniel O'Donnell, the omnipresent galactic super emperor of naff. Started out naff, stayed consistently naff throughout his career and pop round to his house today and you're guaranteed a veritable smorgasbord of naff. He's just naff.


checkoutgirl

Dear Daniel, who aren't in heaven, naff be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be naff, on Earth as it is in heaven. Give is this day, our daily naff...


Subtle Mocking

Morrissey

Serious answer: Cliff Richard's been solidly naff for over 50 years. It's what he does best.

WesterlyWinds

Quote from: WesterlyWinds on June 04, 2015, 03:37:28 PM
Has anyone said The Kooks yet? Yes? Well it should be said on every page really. The Kooks.

Mijkediablo

Quote from: ajsmith on June 15, 2015, 05:50:19 PM
Total Coelo

I Eat Cannibals is a great tune, cheesy as hell but it gets people dancing.

The Who- might be a controversial pick, but I've just never taken to them or anything they've done.

Rolf Lundgren

Quote from: Subtle Mocking on June 15, 2015, 05:57:29 PM
Serious answer: Cliff Richard's been solidly naff for over 50 years. It's what he does best.

In Cliff's defence, he did briefly break the spell with 'Devil Woman'.

With Daniel O'Donnell it's naff quicksand. If he ever tried to get out, he'd just be even more naff. Case in point, Daniel wearing Converse:


Jockice

Quote from: Mijkediablo on June 15, 2015, 06:07:04 PM
The Who- might be a controversial pick, but I've just never taken to them or anything they've done.


Good call. Along with U2 and ACDC I don't hate them, I just don't get them. At all.

Phil_A

Ray Stevens has always epitomised naffness for me, even before he made his career comeback as a racist cunt.

I mean for fuck's sake, "The Streak" . A one-joke novelty song that has never, ever been funny. So bereft of comic invention that it actually repeats the same "reporter on the scene" bit three times in the space of a song that's barely three minutes long.

In terms of actual groups, has there ever been a naffer bunch of people in one place at a time than ersatz-salsa titans Modern Romance?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTIUikZIZYI

Jockice

Quote from: Phil_A on June 15, 2015, 07:35:43 PM

In terms of actual groups, has there ever been a naffer bunch of people in one place at a time than ersatz-salsa titans Modern Romance?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTIUikZIZYI

They started off as a 'new wave' group called Leyton Buzzards, and then became new romantics under the name Modern Romance (I have a distinct memory of seeing them on TV doing a self-titled Spandau Ballet soundalike) before jumping on the salsa bandwagon. Their frontman Geoff Deane also wrote crap sitcom Babes In The Wood, so there's a space in hell specially reserved for him.

checkoutgirl

The band Clean Bandit. In particular when they were flogging stuff for Microsoft. Even the name Clean Bandit, it's just so very very naff.


Mr Banlon

A relative of mine worked at RSO records. For my birthday in 1983, she gave me signed Modern Romance album that the guys had signed when they came into her work. It had the message "Here's to you Mr Banlon[nb]Obviously not Mr Banlon[/nb]thanks for being a super fan."
My relative asked me if I liked it. I said, "No, they're rubbish. I hate them !" She started crying[nb]I actually politely said thanks and later drew spunky dicks all over the cover[/nb]

Johnny Textface


Stoneage Dinosaurs




Brundle-Fly

Quote from: Mijkediablo on June 15, 2015, 06:07:04 PM
I Eat Cannibals is a great tune, cheesy as hell but it gets people dancing.

To be fair, Toto Cuelo barely scraped an album together and are clearly in the One Hit Wonder category.  Who else can we nominate then?

I was about to sarcastically suggest Wildchild the Renegade Master bloke until I read this...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roger_McKenzie

Blimey.

Shaky

Slipknot
Chris De Burgh
Ronan Keating

Hell of a gig that would be.



BlodwynPig

I was (being forced to) listen to The Magical Mystery Tour yesterday and there was actually a bit in one of the songs that was fantastic.

So, Not The Beatles.




Brundle-Fly

Quote from: studpuppet on June 16, 2015, 10:04:06 AM
The Swingles

Not having that. Always loved them. Listen to their beautiful version of Nick Drake's River Man. Although this is third generation Swingles, I reckon.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxQkVtvwcLk

SavageHedgehog

Modern Romance brings to mind their brothers in modernity Modern Talking, who had a UK hit with Brother Louie, and a lot of hits in Europe that sounded an awful lot like Brother Louie but which we never took to for whatever reason. I like Brother Louie, but it's undeniably naff, although I guess featuring random clips from Once Upon a Time in America in the video before it became a standard critical fave lends it a little bit of credibility.

ThickAndCreamy

Boney M, the naffest pop group in the history of the world.

Every time after I finish an episode of TOTP2 I thank the lord that I was not alive in an era where Boney M were topping the charts. They're a pop group for accountants, trudging along in wacky outfits, like a ladies night in a run down pub where everyone is dressed in pink tutus. They're the nadir of disco, a sonically dead bunch of naff gods who should be have been chucked in a skip a long time ago.

Here they are last year performing in between their stints at Pontins and Butlins nationwide, looking as naff as ever, and suitably accompanied by even naffer dancers;

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXfdVsf_Lfo

To make things worse, they also inspired the naffest parody song ever recorded. A steaming, dribbling pile of naff so bad that just watching makes me want to join a punk band and start a forest fire.

Barron Knights - A Taste of Aggro.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBUyTn_wIhc


Serge

Quote from: BlodwynPig on June 16, 2015, 10:03:27 AM
I was (being forced to) listen to The Magical Mystery Tour yesterday and there was actually a bit in one of the songs that was fantastic.

So, Not The Beatles.

Dare I ask which bit?

DangledTeeth

Michael Buble - Does his swing-pop crooning for what seems like an eternity and seems to appear on lurid ITV programmes a lot. I can imagine an advert for his latest album: the cover has an electric blue background with old Michael smirking into the distance with his jacket[nb][/nb] draped over his shoulder.  ''Michael Boo-blay, Night Stars, out on the 15th of November for the change-fumbling price of £7.56, at Tessscoooo'