Your Top 10 Hated Films Of All Time

[Mr Banlon]

I just don't like films. Like in general, as a medium.

Do you prefer séances ?

[DukeDeMondo]

Happiness. Fuck off, Happiness, you cowardly cunt of a thing.
Wild At Heart. Fuck off, Wild at Heart.
Blue Velvet. Fuck off, Blue Velvet, stick your earholes up your arse.
Blow Up. Fuck off, Blow Up.
8 1/2. Would you ever, 8 1/2? Seriously. Fuck off.
Fish Tank. Fuck off, Fish Tank.
Jeff Who Lives At Home. Get right to fuck, for fuck sake Jeff Who Lives At Home.
The Omen (2006). Go and fuck yourself The Omen (2006), you fuckin bucket of a thing.
Breaking The Waves. Break my fuck, Breaking the Waves, you pathetic bastard.
Shame. Get to fuck, Shame, just fuck off to fuck.

[holyzombiejesus]

Can only think of 4 at present.

Natural Born Killers
The Doors
Adaptation
The Element of Crime

[Blinder Data]

This is great - it's like I'm 14 again and listing all my favourite films on IMDB messageboards.

I don't really understand the hatred for Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? Loved it when I was younger, saw it again recently and I still think it's an interesting film that talks about relationships in a pleasingly raw way (not common in cinema, I feel).

[Stoneage Dinosaurs]

Do you prefer séances ?

Acorah is basically my Quenteriantino

[Fabian Thomsett]

The Exorcist. Very tedious viewing for the most part. And the simplistic good vs. evil 'morality' is not something I can take seriously.

Can only think of 4 at present.

Natural Born Killers
The Doors
The Element of Crime

Good call on the latter two. I think I gave up on Natural Born Killers somewhere around the 20 minute mark.

[SavageHedgehog]

Not sure I can work up full-on hate for them now, but these films all pissed me off with their sheer (to some degree, unexpected) uselessness when I saw them:

Empire Records
Reality Bites
Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)
Red Dragon
A Good Day to Die Hard
Away We Go
Lady in the Water
Clash of the Titans (2010)

I can't think of any more right now, so I'll make an honorable mention for Space Jam for disappointing me terribly as a child, and betraying a great pop cultural legacy but eventually becoming an icon for the smug 90s nostalgia wave. Also, the film adaptation of The Singing Detective for being the only film I've ever walked out on, although I revisited it a few years ago and I guess it's not *that* bad, but it still shouldn't have been made.

[SavageHedgehog]

The Green Mile and Braveheart also jump out looking at the IMDb Top 250.

http://www.imdb.com/chart/top?ref_=nv_ch_250_4

I take IMDB rankings with a mine of salt, but there's some really strange stuff on that list these days. Fanboy mediocrities like Days of Future Past can be easily explained, but Hachi: A Dog's Tale? I mean, I haven't seen it, and I'm sure it's perfectly pleasant, but beloved enough to get to #190? Who knew?

[checkoutgirl]

Bugsy Malone (1976) Alan Parker

What? You are mental. You need help.

[Noodle Lizard]

Reality Bites

Yes, this'd rank pretty high on my list.  A total cowpat of a movie.

[checkoutgirl]

Can I put this thread in my top 10 most hated things of all time? I hate is thread. I hate it so much I will not read it any more.

Thanks.

[Puce Moment]

I Heart Huckabees (2004) - I fucking despise David O. Russell and all his shitty films
The Darjeeling Limited (2007) - Anderson jumps between great and awful, self-satisfied shit
Crash (2004) - Probably the film I most hate - awful, sentimental dross - fuck off Haggis
The Birds (1963) -  Hitchcock is one of the most over-rated directors, and this is up there in his shit pile
Oceans Eleven (2001) & Oceans Twelve (2004) - smug, rich people having a right ol' laugh inbetween all their really socially important films, yeah?
From Dusk Till Dawn (1996) - Shit and boring - self-indulgent
Before Sunrise (1995) - argh!
Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol (2011) - An exercise in unbalanced, boring action filmmaking
Closer (2004) -  has everything I could hate in a film - smug, middle-class, jude law, clive owen, julia roberts, marber
The Hurt Locker(2008) - don't even start me

[checkoutgirl]

I hope this thread dies in a horrendous chip pan fire.

[Puce Moment]

[newbridge]

The Birds (1963) -  Hitchcock is one of the most over-rated directors, and this is up there in his shit pile

An incomplete top20:

Reservoir Dogs (1992)

May God have mercy on your soul.

[newbridge]

Also please add to my list:

Zero Dark Thirty
American Sniper

[holyzombiejesus]

The Darjeeling Limited (2007) - Anderson jumps between great and awful, self-satisfied shit

Ah, I don't think he does jump any more; his films are just vile. And, even though I actually liked Darjeeling (the last live action film of his that I could tolerate), I will add Moonrise Kingdom to my list. I think I audibly exclaimed 'oh, fuck off' in the cinema during that one.

[Small Man Big Horse]

Just five for now:

The Blair Witch Project - Stupid characters do stupid things in woods, deserve to die, we don't even get to see their spleens ripped out of their pathetic bodies. Boo.
A.I. - I don't care if Kubrick would have liked the ending or not, it's fucking rubbish and the robot boy should have been stamped on at the beginning of the film by an even bigger robot and then eaten by a robot wolf.
Garden State - Worst film of all time.
2012 - Has a great bit at the beginning when the city falls apart but then is one tired and less impressive set piece after another.
The Dark Knight Rises - Just laughably awful in so many different ways, but having Bane basically being nothing but Talia al Ghul's trained puppy was the worst decision.

[prwc]

Blow Up. Fuck off, Blow Up.

Ah, forgot about that one, tedious wank indeed. Blow Out is far better, a rare example of a [nb]unofficial[/nb]remake improving on the original.

[billtheburger]

Troy.
Death Race (2008)

I've never seen the following titles, because I hate them:
Robocop (2014)
Total Recall (2012)
The Stepford Wives (2004)
Carrie (2013)
The Manchurian Candidate (2004)
Clash of The Titans (2010)
The Karate Kid (2010)
Conan the Barbarian (2010)

[Puce Moment]

Ah, I don't think he does jump any more; his films are just vile. And, even though I actually liked Darjeeling (the last live action film of his that I could tolerate), I will add Moonrise Kingdom to my list. I think I audibly exclaimed 'oh, fuck off' in the cinema during that one.

I couldn't watch that - in fact I avoid his films as a rule, but often find myself in the position of watching them. I thought Grand Budapest Hotel was a triumph in many ways, possibly because it seemed to have less of the ensemble feel about it. Although it parachuted in most of its mates, I was pleased that it mainly focused on Fiennes and  F. Murray Abraham who are less associated with his other 'my kooky famous people friends' films.

I won't have a word said against Rushmore though. I adore that film.

[popcorn]

Moonrise Kingdom rules.

It's rare that I properly hate a movie. In recent years the only one that jumps out at me is God Help the Girl. Incompetently assembled, trite, boring, has a bizarre pro-alternative-medicine subplot - absolutely insufferably twee. I mean this is the kind of thing that people who hate twee things are complaining about, and this is coming from a Belle and Sebastian fan. Ghastly.

[garbed_attic]

Happiness. Fuck off, Happiness, you cowardly cunt of a thing.

Please expand i.e. the cowardliness! I'm intrigued as to why.

Do you reckon they should have just had the guts to call it 'Free the Pedos'?

[Noodle Lizard]

Anyone who thinks Happiness condones paedophilia (i.e. most of IMDb) is ... I dunno, but they're not good.

[garbed_attic]

I only really hate films that strike me as insincere, smug, hectoring or hypocritical... so with that in mind:
Kids
American Beauty (my love for Thora Birch however only increased when I saw a bit from an interview in which she says that it's a rubbish film she's not proud of being involved in)
Kick-Ass
Funny Games (for such a talented director Haneke's films irritate the shit out of me... the cinematic equivalent of Stewart Lee going 'aaaahhhh')
Sin City

Oh and a controversial one... Sightseers, but mostly because you guys kept harping on about its brilliance and it was wobby sub-League of Gentlemen 'so dark' nonsense. I honestly think the second series of Nighty Night has more integrity.

[garbed_attic]

Anyone who thinks Happiness condones paedophilia (i.e. most of IMDb) is ... I dunno, but they're not good.

I was being glib! I don't think that!

I think it's a little smug and off-hand and Todd Solondz probably doesn't care *all that much* about child abuse victims... but personally I think the film is melancholy, funny and well-acted enough to be considered a decent watch at worst!

[Puce Moment]

I didn't include Beyond the Sea (2004) because I didn't have especially high expectations for it, but as film's go it is fucking dross. It kind of reveals Spacey as a bit of a shyster and emperor's new clothes, given that it was his passion project. Some of the worst dialogue and dreadful singing. If you can make it past the first 25mins I salute you.

There could be a whole thread on misguided, financially disastrous, passion project film's by wealthy actors, directors, artists etc, and this would be right up there.

Now, I thought Drive was derivative and dull, but I would not include it in this thread because I can see its merits, and it would be disingenuous to list it just because so many people love it. Same goes for Gravity.

But The Immigrant (2013)? I really cannot fathom how this film got so much acclaim, apart from the casting.

If you guys hate Happiness, you should check out Storytelling. Fuckin' hell.

[Noleedmons]

All of the films that this guy likes.

Fuck me are we still pushing that joke?
Who says this place is stagnating?

[checkoutgirl]

This thread is certainly in my top 10 most hated things of all time, that's for sure. I refuse to read it.

[Steven]

Fuck me are we still pushing that joke?
Who says this place is stagnating?

I think this poster said that.