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What Is The Worst Genre Of Cinema?

Started by Dr Rock, October 01, 2015, 05:40:48 PM

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Dr Rock

Horror films? Less than 1% are any good. Rom-Coms? Same ratio. I'm tempted to vote biopics. Over to you.

Hollow

Romantic comedies are formulaic shit in a way that horror films can barely touch...I no likey.

My ex and her brother had a quite childish way of referring to films of a certain vintage that I have to admit I've ended up adopting myself.

Brown films.
Old westerns and epics from the 60's. Films where anything, human skin, period costumes, scenery, sky, the ground, fire, water... all manage to retain a hue of brown.

I know thats the talk of a philistine but I don't care. I don't like brown films. Except Jason and the Argonauts.

Custard

Sports films are usually a snoozefest for me, unless it's a documentary

Bad News Bears, A League Of Their Own, etc

There are exceptions, mind. Rocky, A Field Of Dreams, but mostly they are the white high heels of films

See also: those dancey films that were all the rage a few years back. Step Up, Footloose remake, etc. Total bobbins

holyzombiejesus

War films and, like someone said upthread, biopics. Oh yeah, biblical films too.

Mr Banlon

'Found-footage' films
British gangster/geezer/football Houlihan films.


Funcrusher

Superhero films

Sci-fi films have been mostly shit for years now. Too many nerd creatives.


Serge


shiftwork2

In reference to the tagger, Ben Dover is now doing an 'old cock' genre which isn't that dissimilar to his old gonzo porno but which now features him going 'oh is that the oldest cock you've ever had darling that is a right gnarly old cock that is, nice bottom'.

I vote for Ben Dover's old cocks.  And sci-fi *runs*

newbridge

Slasher/modern-horror[nb]Does "modern-horror" make sense? "Horror" movies that aren't The Shining/Hitchcock/etc.[/nb] films are objectively awful. There has never been a good one in the history of cinema. Some are interesting only to the extent they are campy relics that invoke a past era (like the 1980s)

Hollow

Quote from: Serge on October 01, 2015, 10:32:29 PM
Films which contain Mel Gibson.

Mad Max is total shit I agree...and by 'shit' I obviously mean awesome.

Can we say 'old Mel Gibson'?

Hollow

Quote from: newbridge on October 02, 2015, 12:33:09 AM
Slasher/modern-horror[nb]Does "modern-horror" make sense? "Horror" movies that aren't The Shining/Hitchcock/etc.[/nb] films are objectively awful. There has never been a good one in the history of cinema. Some are interesting only to the extent they are campy relics that invoke a past era (like the 1980s)

Are we including Halloween in that?...cause that's wrong...even allowing for personal opinion, manifestly wrong.

newbridge

Quote from: Hollow on October 02, 2015, 12:45:49 AM
Are we including Halloween in that?...cause that's wrong...even allowing for personal opinion, manifestly wrong.

I don't mind Halloween because at least it was original when it was made.  But objectively speaking it's not that great of a movie.

Hollow

Quote from: newbridge on October 02, 2015, 12:48:42 AM
I don't mind Halloween because at least it was original when it was made.  But objectively speaking it's not that great of a movie.

Only it is though...I suppose The Thing is objectively poor too?

There are some good 'slasher' films...what about Nightmare On Elm St? You can't say that's not a great movie.

I'm willing to admit the ratio of good to fucking awful is a bit one sided...but to say there are no good modern horror films sounds like snobbery to me.

prwc

Romance and musicals for sure.

Horror is by far my favourite, alongside experimental/generally unclassifiable stuff.

Quote from: Serge on October 01, 2015, 10:32:29 PM
Films which contain Mel Gibson.

Generally I'd agree with you, but I really like The Beaver. I'm probably alone on that one, there was only 2 other people in the cinema when I went to see it.

Mijkediablo

Most of the worst have already been named- romantic comedies especially. Also films about the love lives of teenage vampires in the twenty-first century (too obvious a reference?)

Made-for-TV biopics of still-living celebrities are invariably pretty woeful. I remember seeing one about Meat Loaf last year that was genuinely hilarious: the screenplay was shoddy as fuck, the acting amongst the worst I've ever seen, and it took itself seriously in a way Meat Loaf himself really doesn't. I can't dismiss all biopics though, because there are some great ones: La Vie En Rose, Sid And Nancy, I'm Not There, Ed Wood to name just four.

I find a lot of Westerns almost unwatchable, but within that genre you've got the work of Sergio Leone which raises the entire genre, and also the film Shane, which I loved when I was younger. I feel uneasy watching wartime propaganda films too, although I suppose that is for moral reasons rather than an inherent failing with the genre.

Mr Banlon

Quote from: Mr Banlon on October 01, 2015, 08:34:17 PM
'Found-footage' films
British gangster/geezer/football Houlihan films.
Yeah, but Man Bites Dog was a 'found footage' film you fucking dickhead.

Urinal Cake

Documentaries. They're better suited to tv and as episodes. Also it's a waste of the format to waste all that space on talking heads, found footage and shaky cams.

Puce Moment


newbridge

Quote from: Hollow on October 02, 2015, 12:52:23 AM
There are some good 'slasher' films...what about Nightmare On Elm St? You can't say that's not a great movie.

I can't? If it's enjoyable it's because it's a campy relic of the 80s. It's not a great movie.

Glebe

Quote from: Hollow on October 01, 2015, 05:47:32 PMRomantic comedies are formulaic shit in a way that horror films can barely touch...I no likey.

Yeah, nothing against a good comedy with romantic stuff in, but the whole 'chick flick' genre is so bland... here's another film with two plastic actors on the poster grinning inanely, isn't life grand?

popcorn

Quote from: Glebe on October 02, 2015, 02:17:40 AM
Yeah, nothing against a good comedy with romantic stuff in, but the whole 'chick flick' genre is so bland... here's another film with two plastic actors on the poster grinning inanely, isn't life grand?

Romantic comedies are infuriating because When Harry Met Sally proves they can be absolutely magnificent, but they never are.

Funcrusher

Quote from: newbridge on October 02, 2015, 12:48:42 AM
I don't mind Halloween because at least it was original when it was made.  But objectively speaking it's not that great of a movie.

Halloween is a very good film. Are you including Cronenbergs horror films in this? Or George Romero?

chand

Quote from: shiftwork2 on October 01, 2015, 10:36:56 PM
In reference to the tagger, Ben Dover is now doing an 'old cock' genre which isn't that dissimilar to his old gonzo porno but which now features him going 'oh is that the oldest cock you've ever had darling that is a right gnarly old cock that is, nice bottom'.

I vote for Ben Dover's old cocks.  And sci-fi *runs*

Ron Jeremy did a whole bunch of films under the banner of 'Jurassic Cock' which doesn't really work as a pun at all. Good viewing if you want to watch a really old man desperately pinching the base of his dick in a vain attempt to keep it hard as a beautiful twentysomething wriggles about trying to feel something.

Uh, also another vote for superhero films from me, always feels like a lot of bells and whistles adorning the same two or three storylines. Reasonably enjoyed Chronicle for its effort to subvert the genre and have the superpowered teens just fuck about for the first half of them, but ultimately it still ended up on the "Now we have to stop the bad guy to save this city that doesn't really feel like it has any people in it" track.

MoonDust

Agree on the horror front. The only one I like is the Blair Witch Project. There are moments in that which are genuinely unnerving and tense, which I guess is the desired feeling when watching a horror.

I watched Insidious the other night. Fucking awful, but on the plus side, it was one of them that's so bad I find it entertaining just for the cheesy element.

I suppose then I actually do like horror from an entertaining "christ this is bad" perspective rather than if I try to take them seriously, then they're shite. One thing I do find entertaining about watching horror from the not taking it seriously stance is predicting what's going to happen. This is more entertaining when watching with friends who equally aren't taking it seriously and so don't mind talking over it.

Glebe

Quote from: Funcrusher on October 02, 2015, 07:59:09 AMHalloween is a very good film.

It's a little slow in places, something Carpenter himself has acknowledged.

Hollow

#27
Quote from: Glebe on October 02, 2015, 05:54:02 PM
It's a little slow in places, something Carpenter himself has acknowledged.

Carpenter is his own worst critic though...it's a nice slow burn with a phenomenal last 25 minutes.

Nigh on perfect it is...Carpenter then went on to make the greatest sci-fi and horror film later in The Thing.

Two modern horror classics right there...with In the Mouth of Madness that's proof of Carpenters now extinct genius.

Prince of Darkness is pretty brilliant too.

Assault could probably count as a horror too, it's a virtual remake of NOTLD...even though it's Rio Bravo really, some of The Birds in there too.

Small Man Big Horse

Quote from: prwc on October 02, 2015, 01:10:55 AM
...and musicals for sure.

My other half would agree with you, but I love them to pieces. Watched Singing In The Rain the other night and it was a joyous occasion. I've no time for anything Lloyd-Webber-esque, but anything with a sense of fun about itself is a must watch for me.

I'm with several others who mentioned Westerns, just can't get on with them half of the time, I watched The Searchers a couple of decades back and was bored senseless by it, and that's how I find the majority of them. There's a couple of exceptions, but one has to get rave reviews for me to even give it half a chance.

Glebe

Yeah, musicals can be really annoying... especially romantic comedy musicals. I've only seen bits of Down With Love on TV, but by fuck, I saw enough. And the bloke went on to direct Ant Man instead of Edgar Wright, ffs.