THE GUARDIAN'S 30 worst video games

[thraxx]

I've played more shit games than I care to remember. As a kid, I would buy any football-related game I could get my hands on. Pretty much all of them were terrible. Obvious exceptions: Football Manager, Match Day 1 + 2, Emlyn Hughes'-whatever-it-was-called and, later, Kick Off 2 and Sensible Soccer.

One of the worst was Graeme Souness Vector Soccer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9tqDfR0gVis&t=2m20s

Imagine spending £10 on this and rushing home to play it. Particularly like the commentary on the video, though. Very existential.

That's Emlyn Hughes RIP International Soccer you're talking about.  You should be standing up, mate.

[Jawaka]

Duke Nukem Forever was enjoyable, played it around the release and I can honestly say it was the most fun I've had out of an FPS game since MW2. Two years of shitty shooters in between those two it seems. I'm by no means praising it but it was quite close to a weird shooter that you'd have got on the N64, a very dated game that tried to be amusing but wasn't, yet it was good enough to complete at least one play through, something I fail to achieve with a lot of post ~2008 games. Edit: To be fair, it was probably close to the earlier ones. I've never played them though.

Just saw the second list. There's so many of these I haven't played but yes, Perfect Dark Zero was awful - Could almost fit to the N64 comment but I regretted forcing myself to play it through at least once.

[Jawaka]

Ugh. Ignore.

[hedgehog90]

Resi 6 is a terrible mess of a game, but as long as you played co-op with a friend there are many laughs to be had during the cutscenes. So bad it's good kinda thing.

[Rev]

No, it's an okay game!  Completely cheeseball and overlong, but a solid enough game.  The structure is weird, but the idea that Resi 6 is shit is one of those mystifying things that has stuck for some reason.  It's far from the worst in the series.

[Spiteface]

Resi 6 is certainly nowhere near as bad as people make it out to be.

[Famous Mortimer]

But it's also a fairly long way from being "good". "30 most average games in once amazing series"?

[Hollow]

No, it's an okay game!  Completely cheeseball and overlong, but a solid enough game.  The structure is weird, but the idea that Resi 6 is shit is one of those mystifying things that has stuck for some reason.  It's far from the worst in the series.

What is then? Main series...No lightgun crap or weird online ones... you can have code veronica though.

Is five which you're probably going to (got to?) say, really a worse game than six? No...Five is a polished souless clone of 4, it has the bones of really quite a good game...six has weird controls and all round game engine, horrible sponge bosses too.

What i'm saying i don't think six is that bad either, but if it's not the worst in the main series, what is?

[Thursday]

I've not played 3, but yeah 6 is definitely the worst of the numbered series. Unless Zero counts which I've also not played. Code Veronica might as well be part of the main series even though it's not numbered.

4>REmake>1>2>5>Code Veronica>6

And yet I still agree 6 was alright, in fact maybe better than CV.

I would bet that 3 would go between 2 and 5, and Zero would go between 5 and Code Veronica.

[Hollow]

Code Veronica is probably the second best imo.

1. Remake/original.
2. Code Veronica.  (feels like a proper sequel to the original, and it's huuuuuge, really engaging plot.)
3. Resident Evil 2. (interchangable with CV, they both rule, Kamiya's hatred of horror making for a more action based approach)
4. Resident Evil 4. (shouldn't really be this high as it's such a departure, but it's also stunning)
5. Resident Evil 3.
6. Resident Evil 0. (getting a rerelease on ps4 soon, it's good enough despite some unwelcome gameplay additions, it's one of the last real resi's graphically)
7. Resident Evil 5. (lots and lots wrong plot wise here, plus it NEVER gets dark, that's crap for a horror game...gameplay still strong though.)
8. 6.

If we could deviate from the main series Revelations one and two would be after three.

[Thursday]

Oh that's a point, I've only played Resi Revelations 2, which was fun, but the guns feel too lightweight, they don't have the same satisfying pop when you land a headshot. So it clearly all feels a bit budget but structurally it has a much tighter game than 6.

I didn't get on that well with Code Veronica, but maybe it's one of those things where playing it at the time would have meant I had a lot more fun with it, but going back to it was hard and it didn't have the same charm that the original games had. Also that Steve Burnside pranny is annoying.

[Hollow]

Oh that's a point, I've only played Resi Revelations 2, which was fun, but the guns feel too lightweight, they don't have the same satisfying pop when you land a headshot. So it clearly all feels a bit budget but structurally it has a much tighter game than 6.

I didn't get on that well with Code Veronica, but maybe it's one of those things where playing it at the time would have meant I had a lot more fun with it, but going back to it was hard and it didn't have the same charm that the original games had. Also that Steve Burnside pranny is annoying.

Yeah Steve's a dick, but he does go monster half way through.

Everything after Chris appears is amazing, it's just so enormous most players bailed out before due to Claire's weaker part.

I'd spolier that but im using the ps4 browser and i cant work out how to select text.

[madhair60]

I totally understand why people dislike Resi 6.  It's a clusterfuck, no mistake.  But it's genuinely one of my favourite games ever for the following main reasons.

1. The most batshit, brilliant, technical, empowering, versatile gunplay/combat ever in any game.  You can fucking Quickshot, dive backwards and shoot up from prone, roll around on the fucking floor, melee like a champ. FUCK.  It's so good.  Makes Mercenaries even better than it was before.

2. It's like a 60 hour game and you can play the whole thing with a mate.  That is so fucking rare!

3. No other reasons.

[Thursday]

This thread made me go and buy Resi 3 for completionists sake. It's alright.

[Space ghost]

Code Veronica was designed and intended to be a numbered entry to the series and resi 3 nemesis was supposed to be the spin off title. The titles were switched round to honor the main series exclusivity deal that playstation had with capcom which is why nemesis is one of the shittest entries in the series. Code Veronica is the true sequel to resi 2.

[Hollow]

This thread made me go and buy Resi 3 for completionists sake. It's alright.

What did you get it on?

Cause if you love old school resi you really need a Gamecube, or failing that a Wii.

REmake is all well and good in it's new 1080p, but it's too smooth and well defined dammit, in 480p you could mistake it for being real at times.

There are no better versions of two and three either.

CV still belongs on the DC though.

[Thursday]

PS1 version.

[madhair60]

There are no better versions of two and three either.

What did they add to the Cube versions?  I recall N64 Resi 2 had an alternate control scheme similar to the PS4/Steam Resi 1 REmake remake. (sighs)

[Harpo Speaks]

I've played more shit games than I care to remember. As a kid, I would buy any football-related game I could get my hands on. Pretty much all of them were terrible. Obvious exceptions: Football Manager, Match Day 1 + 2, Emlyn Hughes'-whatever-it-was-called and, later, Kick Off 2 and Sensible Soccer.

Did you ever play Three Lions? It had this bizarre shooting system where an archery-style target would appear in the goal, but even if you managed to place it in the very top corner, the goalkeeper would supernaturally pluck it out of the air without breaking a sweat.

I seem to recall there was some hideous facial mapping going on in there too.

[chand]

God, I played so many football games. Gazza's Superstar Soccer, Gazza II, those Codemasters Man Utd-branded efforts, Striker, Actua Soccer, Virtua Soccer, Emlyn Hughes International Soccer, Gary Lineker's Superstar Soccer, Microprose Soccer, UEFA Striker, World Cup Italia 90, Fever Pitch, that Neo Geo one...not to mention loads of FIFAs, ISS/Pro Evo, Kick Off and SWOS. Most of them were pretty bad, I remember Actua Soccer always felt like there was a great game in there somewhere.

My favourite of the relatively obscure ones was the boringly-named 'European Club Soccer' on the Mega Drive, which was exciting because it looked really realistic to me, compared to the top-down games I'd been used to. Plus unlike WCI'90 it had club teams. Fuck knows how many games I played on that.

Although I love Pro Evo these days and am very excited to play the new one this weekend, I do sort of miss the days when there were other football games. Could do with some quirky downloadable ones that try and be a bit different.

[Hollow]

What did they add to the Cube versions?  I recall N64 Resi 2 had an alternate control scheme similar to the PS4/Steam Resi 1 REmake remake. (sighs)

It's just a graphics thing...the models on the PS1 version are atrocious at times, they made them better for the DC version, and I think again for the Gamecube...maybe not...i just love the Gamecube,

No one should use that modern control scheme though...it breaks the game a bit.

[madhair60]

I use it because I hate the old-style controls by comparison.  I also used the infinite ammo cheat when I played Resi 2 for the first time last year.  On PSP.

I bet you think i'm a right cunt.

[Thursday]

God, I played so many football games. Gazza's Superstar Soccer, Gazza II, those Codemasters Man Utd-branded efforts, Striker, Actua Soccer, Virtua Soccer, Emlyn Hughes International Soccer, Gary Lineker's Superstar Soccer, Microprose Soccer, UEFA Striker, World Cup Italia 90, Fever Pitch, that Neo Geo one...not to mention loads of FIFAs, ISS/Pro Evo, Kick Off and SWOS. Most of them were pretty bad, I remember Actua Soccer always felt like there was a great game in there somewhere.

My favourite of the relatively obscure ones was the boringly-named 'European Club Soccer' on the Mega Drive, which was exciting because it looked really realistic to me, compared to the top-down games I'd been used to. Plus unlike WCI'90 it had club teams. Fuck knows how many games I played on that.

Although I love Pro Evo these days and am very excited to play the new one this weekend, I do sort of miss the days when there were other football games. Could do with some quirky downloadable ones that try and be a bit different.

I remember playing the demo on the Official Playstation magazine of "Three Lions" (The Official England Team Game!) a lot. Not because I enjoyed it, but because they gave the game a 9/10 and I was trying to comprehend why.

Still it was fun trying to learn the quirks of all the different football games you got back then.

[Hollow]

I use it because I hate the old-style controls by comparison.  I also used the infinite ammo cheat when I played Resi 2 for the first time last year.  On PSP.

I bet you think i'm a right cunt.

LOL...yep...not really...it's just people like you have ruined it a bit for the rest of us...:)

Not really it's Capcom wanting more cash that done that.

If the graphics don't move you should be going in the same direction when the screen changes...that's why Mikami made it like that...I suppose you could get used to it...but it suddenly becomes a whole different game when you can move with agility...not horror anymore, action.

[Penfold]

Something really drew me towards Complete Onside Soccer when I was 12.

https://twitter.com/90sfootball/status/653661473034493952

I think it was the Full Management Options.

[Eight Taiwanese Teenagers]

Anyone remember Brian Clough's Football Fortunes?

[lazarou]

You haven't lived until you've played Kenny Dalglish Soccer Match.

[Phil_A]

You haven't lived until you've played Kenny Dalglish Soccer Match.

Indeed. The best part was when Kenny, apparently suffering some kind of horrible facial paralysis, would give you the benefit of his footballing wisdom.

[Beagle 2]

God, I played so many football games. Gazza's Superstar Soccer, Gazza II, those Codemasters Man Utd-branded efforts, Striker, Actua Soccer, Virtua Soccer, Emlyn Hughes International Soccer, Gary Lineker's Superstar Soccer, Microprose Soccer, UEFA Striker, World Cup Italia 90, Fever Pitch, that Neo Geo one...not to mention loads of FIFAs, ISS/Pro Evo, Kick Off and SWOS. Most of them were pretty bad, I remember Actua Soccer always felt like there was a great game in there somewhere.

My favourite of the relatively obscure ones was the boringly-named 'European Club Soccer' on the Mega Drive, which was exciting because it looked really realistic to me, compared to the top-down games I'd been used to. Plus unlike WCI'90 it had club teams. Fuck knows how many games I played on that.

Although I love Pro Evo these days and am very excited to play the new one this weekend, I do sort of miss the days when there were other football games. Could do with some quirky downloadable ones that try and be a bit different.

I think I've played pretty much all of those, and I'll throw in Adidas Power Soccer and Michael Owen's World League Soccer, which had imaginative fake names such as 'Mark Oversaturn', but featured a good old-fashioned blind spot that you could score from every time.

I still go back to ISS '98, that's just a fantastic, frenetic arcade game where you can dribble it past the entire team if you've got the skillz. Plus Ibrahim Ba is the best player on it due to it's hairstyle-based ability system.

I definitely miss the buzz of getting a new football game and your mates coming round to play it with everybody on a level playing field. Maybe it's just mates I miss. Either way, could do with a few more fun footy games.

God Microprose Soccer was shit. Must have sunk hours into that. Reno in the indoor league. I've wasted my life.

[Thursday]

ISS Pro on the playstation was the one for me, obviously it was bettered, but nothing felt better than landing a perfect through ball in that, nothing.

The one I remember most from earlier in my childhood was Empire Soccer, which had a thing where it was quite easy to score by just rounding the keeper, but I took pride in getting good enough to score properly rather than using that noob technique.